I don't know what to do with my daughter anymore, i am about to give up on her. update
My daughter is 13 years old. we have been having problems with her for awhile.
In November we had her baker acted for threatening to kill herself. she stayed the whole weekend.
Today about 30 min ago she told me she needed to get a book out of my car. she comes back in and my husband had a feeling he needed to check her pockets. She had a lighter and a cig butt in her back pocket. we jumped her ass and took her TV away from her, the only thing she has gotten back , she has lost everything else due to other problems. she start screaming she is going to kill herself tonight, she is saying it over and over again, she says she has no reason to live.
I can't do this anymore, i am through, my nerve can't deal with this anymore. I am on the verge of a nervious breakdown.
she says she isn't smoking, i asked her why did she have a cig butt , she says she don't know. I smoke and i have always talked to my kids about how bad it is and that i better not ever find out either one of them are smoking. i know lead by example, it is a habit i can't seem to break.
This whole killing herself, i don't know what to do anymore, this is the 2nd time she has said this and last time she was baker acted for the weekend this time if we did it again it would be for a month, all of this is over us finding a cig butt and a lighter in her pocket. The last time was over her TV.
She used to not be like this, all of this behavior started last year, when we moved and she started this school. This is why we are looking into moving and getting her into a different school.
I don't know what to do anymore. Someone please help me, i am lost. I am about to give up.
Tonight before she went to bed. I went to her room and try to talk to her. She wouldn't do much talking but she wasn't screaming. I asked her about the cig butt and the lighter because that is what started this whole mess. She still says she isn't smoking. She says she don't know where the cig butt came from and the lighter she got out of my car and she light to plays with lighter. I told her let say you are telling the truth. Put yourself in my position, you are a mom and you have a 13 and you find a cig butt and alighter in her back pocket, what would you think? she said that she is smoking.
Then i talked to her about the threatening to kill herself. I asked her why? she said because you took my stuff. I started crying and i told her, that i don't want to send her back to the Centers again, but i will because i don't want to wake up and find my daughter dead, i told her i love her and she has her whole life ahead of her. high school, college, a husband, children. that her stuff is just material object. She can earn her stuff back she just has to show me responsibility and maturity. I asked her if anything is going on at school and she said NO, everything is fine at school, she loves school. I told her she can talk to me about anything. I told her we are scheduling her an appointment at the center in lancanto tomorrow to see if we can find out what is going on with her but i really wished she would talk to me. I told her I love her and her and her brother are the 2 most important people in my life and it would kill me if anything happen to anyone of them.