Our newest argument? Why my dd can't go to her house.
I am just done with the drama it brings. Despite my dismal relationship with her I've let her see my daughter. I would drop her off (because we cannot be in the same building without some sort of nit picking at my life and how I live it) and she would come home and act funny, like just general acting out, not listening, what have you. It came out that because my mom decided one day she doesn't like my dh (and yes it happened like that, she loved him until he answered my phone and she started screaming into it thinking it was me, and he told her she needed to calm down and stop acting like a child, since then, hates him) anyway, she doesn't like him, so dd shouldn't like him. Shed tell dd she didn't have to listen to him, teach her all kinds of nasty little things to say, it was awful. I cut their time together right then but through the guilt of my other family members, I gradually let her back over, but only if my dad was there. Then dd comes home one day and dh asked how her visit was, what did they talk about, what did they do, etc. "Nona(my mom) wants to know why daddy doesn't work and if daddy hits mommy" Wtf! He has a perfectly good job as a parts counterman and he has never laid a hand on me. There was NO reason for that to be in my 4 year olds head. Had an argument with my mother about how that was totally unacceptable and it resulted in nobody speaking and Christmas, Halloween, thanksgiving and new years being spent totally seperate. I even got a formal phone call from my dad saying I was not invited to the house for Christmas because if I came mom would make everyone miserable. Great.
Fast forward to today. Out of no where, an impromptu, 6 text convo happened.
Mom "We want to see Ang. Is tomorrow good?"
Me "no thank you"
Mom " well when is good"
Me "not ever"
Mom" why are you doing this to her? She hasn't done anything and we've left you alone just like you wish"
(I hate that about my mom, like you wish, like I just decided one day that I didn't want her having any influence over my daughter)
Me "you mean why am I doing this to you, you're the only one I want leaving us alone. dad, (my brother and sister), all know where I live, but you forbid them all from contact and dad won't disobey because its just easier than dealing with you"
I have no doubt she has already called my grandmother to tell her all about how awful I'm being.