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thinking of holding my son back

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
in school. currently he is seven and in first grade. I've been having problems with him. like Thursday he had homework in question form. he is asked to sound each letter out to attempt in blending them to hear the word. number was the word. granted its a bigger word however I ask him to sound it out. he did every letter correctly. then claimed he read the word tree. I then asked him to point out where the t wad. he pointed to the b. he just doesn't get it. then I got the reading fluency paper today. at this point in the year, he is expected to be reading 35-40 words per minute. My son is reading 27. at the end of the year he should be reading 60 words per minute. honestly at this point out is an unrealistic goal for him to set with less than 90 days of school. so I talked to his teacher, counselor and principal and they agree with me. what would you do
Posted by Anonymous on Feb. 12, 2013 at 11:37 PM
Replies (51-56):
melakay1981
by Platinum Member on Feb. 13, 2013 at 10:58 PM

When I search statistics and talk to my daughters oncologist I get completely different numbers but that is not even the point to what I was saying.  I do not disagree with others parents medicating their kids.  The OP did say that the school is pushing for her child to be tested for ADHD and that is wrong in my opinion.  Did you know that schools get extra funding for kids with disabilities?  Did you know that they get a leeway on their standardized testing for each child with a disability?  I just worry that schools are pushing this on parents for these reasons.  She even said she felt backed in a corner as I did, I did not feel my daughter needed to be medicated and from the way the OP sounds she does not think her son needs to be medicated.  If it is working for your son that is great and I do not think it is bad for every kid, but there are some kids walking around out there that do not need it and the only reason the parents are medicating them is because they are afraid of the repercussions from the school if they don't do it.  I even read a blog a long time ago about a mother who was threatened by the school with cps if she did not medicate her child.  To me it is wrong.


Quoting Kaybean:

I just looked it up and it says that 1500 kids in the entire US are diagnosed with a brain tumor each year. That proves what I said that the reason for a child having difficulty in the class isn't typically because of a tumor. I realize that happened to YOUR dd, but that is very unlikely to be the case with others, considering it actually is quite rare. 1500 out of hundreds of thousands of kids isn't that much. With ADHD, nearly 1 in 10 kids is diagnosed with it. So ADHD is FAR more likely to be the issue. Now don't get me wrong, ADHD is diagnosed way too quickly and yes, some kids ARE diagnosed wrong, like your dd for example, but a brain tumor is NOT typical and the OP should not just assume ADHD can't be the cause. She should look at all possibilities before just ruling anything out. If she wanted to get her son checked for a brain tumor just to be sure, there's no harm in that either, but just because your dd had something rare, that doesn't mean ADHD shouldn't be looked into because that COULD very well be what her son has. Also, just because your dd didn't do well on the meds, doesn't mean other kids don't thrive off of it, like my 10 year old son for example.


Quoting melakay1981:

Things like this are more common than you realize.  I am not one to quote Dr. Phil or anything like that but prior to all of this I wondered why anytime there was a kid on his show misbehaving he always said they where going to send that child for a complete MRI of his brain.  I never realized how many kids in the world are suffering from brain tumors.  Most people with brain tumors die in their sleep and the family does not know until the autopsy report comes back.  I am not saying all kids that are diagnosed with ADHD have brain tumors, but I do wonder how many are walking around with one and on medication for ADHD.


Quoting Kaybean:

I'm sorry that happened to your dd, but that isn't typical. I know ADHD is diagnosed too quickly, but that shouldn't mean parents flat out refuse to consider it when their child is struggling. If a child is struggling, EVERY possibility should be considered. My oldest son has ADHD. They saw the signs when he was in preschool and his K, 1st, 2nd and 3rd teachers all said he same. In 3rd grade, we finally decided to have him tested for ADHD and not only did his pediatrician agree, so did we. We first tried stress balls and certain things and jt didn't work. Then we tried a natural ADHD diet and supplements and that didn't work and we finally resorted to Adderall when he fell so far behind in 3rd grade,fever. He's in 5th grade now and is doing amazing. The meds made a night and day difference for him. My point is, Adderall isn't all bad. It really can be great for some kids, and she should cinsider all possibilities and not just automatically rule anything out. My son has zero issues with Adderall. No sweats, no headaches, nothing.


Quoting melakay1981:

If you do not feel he has ADHD do not even waste your time getting him tested.  The school tried pulling the same crap with my daughter when she was in 2nd grade.  I took her to see a psychiatrist and they gave me a prescription for Adderall.  I gave her one pill and I said I would NEVER give her another one.  She woke up sweating like crazy and she looked higher than a kite.  The only reason I did it was because I felt backed in a corner by the school, I pushed back and they finally left me alone about it.  3 years later we found out what was causing the behavioral problems....Oh she only had a cancerous brain tumor growing in her head.  Yeah everyone said she had ADHD.  They removed the tumor and all the problems disappeared.  I just wonder what effect the medication could have had on the tumor if I would have continued giving it to her.



Quoting Anonymous:

She suggested it to me as well early I the school year and I refused. But at a parent teacher conference last week she has been writing stuff down he's doing. And honestly I'm scared she'll say I'm not helping him tonight fullest advantage. So I'll get him tested but he's NOT going on meds. I'm sorry I can't give my baby boy meds I give to 70 yr old ppl with hight blood pressure. Can't do it! Creating a routine w him and getting him involved in more social settings is what I want to try. And also a lot less video games.... :\



Quoting Anonymous:

Thanks. good luck to you also. My son's teacher in the beginning of the year mentioned adhd testing and I flat out refused. I told her no. we aren't going to medicate him for something one person believes he has. Not to mention boss are taught from an early age to be rowdy and rambunctious.







Quoting Anonymous:

I know how you feel! My son is also 7 and in 1st grade he isn't so much behind. But he's having trouble focusing and staying on task :( makes me sad. His teacher and I are what seems like in constant communication and she suggest I get him tested for ADHD (of course). My aunt is a teacher and so were my grandparents and they think he's bored but idk... It's so hard!! I don't want him falling behind and he isn't as if now but I need to figure out something to help him. As a nurse I'd rather not put him on meds. I'm just honesty lost Good luck to you!! :)












Kaybean
by Ruby Member on Feb. 14, 2013 at 12:16 AM
I get what you're saying and no parent should medicate against their judgement because they feel forced. I'm not even saying her child does have ADHD or that she SHOULD medicate. All I'm saying is she should consider everything as a possibility. Parents may not "think" it's this or that, when it really is, just like a school may think it is when it isn't. Just for the record, I don't view my son as having a disability and either does his teacher. They get no benefits from him being diagnosed with it. He's in a regular class with no special ed or IEP of any kind. Again, all I'm saying is, she should at least consider each and every possibility out there. It could be ADHD, a food allergy, dyslexia, a vision problem, depression, anxiety or even something as unlikely as a brain tumor. No stone should go unturned.


Quoting melakay1981:

When I search statistics and talk to my daughters oncologist I get completely different numbers but that is not even the point to what I was saying.  I do not disagree with others parents medicating their kids.  The OP did say that the school is pushing for her child to be tested for ADHD and that is wrong in my opinion.  Did you know that schools get extra funding for kids with disabilities?  Did you know that they get a leeway on their standardized testing for each child with a disability?  I just worry that schools are pushing this on parents for these reasons.  She even said she felt backed in a corner as I did, I did not feel my daughter needed to be medicated and from the way the OP sounds she does not think her son needs to be medicated.  If it is working for your son that is great and I do not think it is bad for every kid, but there are some kids walking around out there that do not need it and the only reason the parents are medicating them is because they are afraid of the repercussions from the school if they don't do it.  I even read a blog a long time ago about a mother who was threatened by the school with cps if she did not medicate her child.  To me it is wrong.



Quoting Kaybean:

I just looked it up and it says that 1500 kids in the entire US are diagnosed with a brain tumor each year. That proves what I said that the reason for a child having difficulty in the class isn't typically because of a tumor. I realize that happened to YOUR dd, but that is very unlikely to be the case with others, considering it actually is quite rare. 1500 out of hundreds of thousands of kids isn't that much. With ADHD, nearly 1 in 10 kids is diagnosed with it. So ADHD is FAR more likely to be the issue. Now don't get me wrong, ADHD is diagnosed way too quickly and yes, some kids ARE diagnosed wrong, like your dd for example, but a brain tumor is NOT typical and the OP should not just assume ADHD can't be the cause. She should look at all possibilities before just ruling anything out. If she wanted to get her son checked for a brain tumor just to be sure, there's no harm in that either, but just because your dd had something rare, that doesn't mean ADHD shouldn't be looked into because that COULD very well be what her son has. Also, just because your dd didn't do well on the meds, doesn't mean other kids don't thrive off of it, like my 10 year old son for example.




Quoting melakay1981:


Things like this are more common than you realize.  I am not one to quote Dr. Phil or anything like that but prior to all of this I wondered why anytime there was a kid on his show misbehaving he always said they where going to send that child for a complete MRI of his brain.  I never realized how many kids in the world are suffering from brain tumors.  Most people with brain tumors die in their sleep and the family does not know until the autopsy report comes back.  I am not saying all kids that are diagnosed with ADHD have brain tumors, but I do wonder how many are walking around with one and on medication for ADHD.




Quoting Kaybean:

I'm sorry that happened to your dd, but that isn't typical. I know ADHD is diagnosed too quickly, but that shouldn't mean parents flat out refuse to consider it when their child is struggling. If a child is struggling, EVERY possibility should be considered. My oldest son has ADHD. They saw the signs when he was in preschool and his K, 1st, 2nd and 3rd teachers all said he same. In 3rd grade, we finally decided to have him tested for ADHD and not only did his pediatrician agree, so did we. We first tried stress balls and certain things and jt didn't work. Then we tried a natural ADHD diet and supplements and that didn't work and we finally resorted to Adderall when he fell so far behind in 3rd grade,fever. He's in 5th grade now and is doing amazing. The meds made a night and day difference for him. My point is, Adderall isn't all bad. It really can be great for some kids, and she should cinsider all possibilities and not just automatically rule anything out. My son has zero issues with Adderall. No sweats, no headaches, nothing.



Quoting melakay1981:


If you do not feel he has ADHD do not even waste your time getting him tested.  The school tried pulling the same crap with my daughter when she was in 2nd grade.  I took her to see a psychiatrist and they gave me a prescription for Adderall.  I gave her one pill and I said I would NEVER give her another one.  She woke up sweating like crazy and she looked higher than a kite.  The only reason I did it was because I felt backed in a corner by the school, I pushed back and they finally left me alone about it.  3 years later we found out what was causing the behavioral problems....Oh she only had a cancerous brain tumor growing in her head.  Yeah everyone said she had ADHD.  They removed the tumor and all the problems disappeared.  I just wonder what effect the medication could have had on the tumor if I would have continued giving it to her.





Quoting Anonymous:

She suggested it to me as well early I the school year and I refused. But at a parent teacher conference last week she has been writing stuff down he's doing. And honestly I'm scared she'll say I'm not helping him tonight fullest advantage. So I'll get him tested but he's NOT going on meds. I'm sorry I can't give my baby boy meds I give to 70 yr old ppl with hight blood pressure. Can't do it! Creating a routine w him and getting him involved in more social settings is what I want to try. And also a lot less video games.... :\




Quoting Anonymous:

Thanks. good luck to you also. My son's teacher in the beginning of the year mentioned adhd testing and I flat out refused. I told her no. we aren't going to medicate him for something one person believes he has. Not to mention boss are taught from an early age to be rowdy and rambunctious.








Quoting Anonymous:

I know how you feel! My son is also 7 and in 1st grade he isn't so much behind. But he's having trouble focusing and staying on task :( makes me sad. His teacher and I are what seems like in constant communication and she suggest I get him tested for ADHD (of course). My aunt is a teacher and so were my grandparents and they think he's bored but idk... It's so hard!! I don't want him falling behind and he isn't as if now but I need to figure out something to help him. As a nurse I'd rather not put him on meds. I'm just honesty lost Good luck to you!! :)




















Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
melakay1981
by Platinum Member on Feb. 14, 2013 at 12:29 AM

When I took my daughter to the psychiatrist he did not want to hear anything I had to say, he was only going off of the paperwork that the school sent him.  We where in the room for no more than 10 minutes and he had her diagnosed with ADHD and handed me a prescription for Adderall.  The whole situation just left a bad taste in my mouth over kids being diagnosed with ADHD.  I know not all Dr.s are like this, and most probably do extensive testing but this one didn't and I will admit that I am a little bitter about it.  It is hard for me not to think the way I do and I will admit that when I hear of someone saying that their kid is having attention/behavioral problems I do tend to make them aware that their are other things it could be.  It was never suggested to my cousin that her kid could have a food allergy from her sons Dr.  She did some research and decided to cut things out of his diet and see if it helped, here it was red dye that made him hyper.  She cut it out of his diet and he is doing 90% better than what he was. 


Quoting Kaybean:

I get what you're saying and no parent should medicate against their judgement because they feel forced. I'm not even saying her child does have ADHD or that she SHOULD medicate. All I'm saying is she should consider everything as a possibility. Parents may not "think" it's this or that, when it really is, just like a school may think it is when it isn't. Just for the record, I don't view my son as having a disability and either does his teacher. They get no benefits from him being diagnosed with it. He's in a regular class with no special ed or IEP of any kind. Again, all I'm saying is, she should at least consider each and every possibility out there. It could be ADHD, a food allergy, dyslexia, a vision problem, depression, anxiety or even something as unlikely as a brain tumor. No stone should go unturned.


Quoting melakay1981:

When I search statistics and talk to my daughters oncologist I get completely different numbers but that is not even the point to what I was saying.  I do not disagree with others parents medicating their kids.  The OP did say that the school is pushing for her child to be tested for ADHD and that is wrong in my opinion.  Did you know that schools get extra funding for kids with disabilities?  Did you know that they get a leeway on their standardized testing for each child with a disability?  I just worry that schools are pushing this on parents for these reasons.  She even said she felt backed in a corner as I did, I did not feel my daughter needed to be medicated and from the way the OP sounds she does not think her son needs to be medicated.  If it is working for your son that is great and I do not think it is bad for every kid, but there are some kids walking around out there that do not need it and the only reason the parents are medicating them is because they are afraid of the repercussions from the school if they don't do it.  I even read a blog a long time ago about a mother who was threatened by the school with cps if she did not medicate her child.  To me it is wrong.



Quoting Kaybean:

I just looked it up and it says that 1500 kids in the entire US are diagnosed with a brain tumor each year. That proves what I said that the reason for a child having difficulty in the class isn't typically because of a tumor. I realize that happened to YOUR dd, but that is very unlikely to be the case with others, considering it actually is quite rare. 1500 out of hundreds of thousands of kids isn't that much. With ADHD, nearly 1 in 10 kids is diagnosed with it. So ADHD is FAR more likely to be the issue. Now don't get me wrong, ADHD is diagnosed way too quickly and yes, some kids ARE diagnosed wrong, like your dd for example, but a brain tumor is NOT typical and the OP should not just assume ADHD can't be the cause. She should look at all possibilities before just ruling anything out. If she wanted to get her son checked for a brain tumor just to be sure, there's no harm in that either, but just because your dd had something rare, that doesn't mean ADHD shouldn't be looked into because that COULD very well be what her son has. Also, just because your dd didn't do well on the meds, doesn't mean other kids don't thrive off of it, like my 10 year old son for example.




Quoting melakay1981:


Things like this are more common than you realize.  I am not one to quote Dr. Phil or anything like that but prior to all of this I wondered why anytime there was a kid on his show misbehaving he always said they where going to send that child for a complete MRI of his brain.  I never realized how many kids in the world are suffering from brain tumors.  Most people with brain tumors die in their sleep and the family does not know until the autopsy report comes back.  I am not saying all kids that are diagnosed with ADHD have brain tumors, but I do wonder how many are walking around with one and on medication for ADHD.




Quoting Kaybean:

I'm sorry that happened to your dd, but that isn't typical. I know ADHD is diagnosed too quickly, but that shouldn't mean parents flat out refuse to consider it when their child is struggling. If a child is struggling, EVERY possibility should be considered. My oldest son has ADHD. They saw the signs when he was in preschool and his K, 1st, 2nd and 3rd teachers all said he same. In 3rd grade, we finally decided to have him tested for ADHD and not only did his pediatrician agree, so did we. We first tried stress balls and certain things and jt didn't work. Then we tried a natural ADHD diet and supplements and that didn't work and we finally resorted to Adderall when he fell so far behind in 3rd grade,fever. He's in 5th grade now and is doing amazing. The meds made a night and day difference for him. My point is, Adderall isn't all bad. It really can be great for some kids, and she should cinsider all possibilities and not just automatically rule anything out. My son has zero issues with Adderall. No sweats, no headaches, nothing.



Quoting melakay1981:


If you do not feel he has ADHD do not even waste your time getting him tested.  The school tried pulling the same crap with my daughter when she was in 2nd grade.  I took her to see a psychiatrist and they gave me a prescription for Adderall.  I gave her one pill and I said I would NEVER give her another one.  She woke up sweating like crazy and she looked higher than a kite.  The only reason I did it was because I felt backed in a corner by the school, I pushed back and they finally left me alone about it.  3 years later we found out what was causing the behavioral problems....Oh she only had a cancerous brain tumor growing in her head.  Yeah everyone said she had ADHD.  They removed the tumor and all the problems disappeared.  I just wonder what effect the medication could have had on the tumor if I would have continued giving it to her.





Quoting Anonymous:

She suggested it to me as well early I the school year and I refused. But at a parent teacher conference last week she has been writing stuff down he's doing. And honestly I'm scared she'll say I'm not helping him tonight fullest advantage. So I'll get him tested but he's NOT going on meds. I'm sorry I can't give my baby boy meds I give to 70 yr old ppl with hight blood pressure. Can't do it! Creating a routine w him and getting him involved in more social settings is what I want to try. And also a lot less video games.... :\




Quoting Anonymous:

Thanks. good luck to you also. My son's teacher in the beginning of the year mentioned adhd testing and I flat out refused. I told her no. we aren't going to medicate him for something one person believes he has. Not to mention boss are taught from an early age to be rowdy and rambunctious.








Quoting Anonymous:

I know how you feel! My son is also 7 and in 1st grade he isn't so much behind. But he's having trouble focusing and staying on task :( makes me sad. His teacher and I are what seems like in constant communication and she suggest I get him tested for ADHD (of course). My aunt is a teacher and so were my grandparents and they think he's bored but idk... It's so hard!! I don't want him falling behind and he isn't as if now but I need to figure out something to help him. As a nurse I'd rather not put him on meds. I'm just honesty lost Good luck to you!! :)






















Kaybean
by Ruby Member on Feb. 14, 2013 at 12:53 AM
Yeah, I don't like that either. Even with my son having ADHD, I still hate how overly diagnosed it is and how quick people are to try and drug a child because they don't want to deal with them. We did try cutting things out, putting him on a soecial diet and adding supplements and after 2 months of trying it, we realized it wasn't working. My brother was put on Ritalin in middle school and hated how he felt on it and it left a bad taste in his mouth about ADHD and medication as well and in turn, he judged my decision to put my son on Adderall, but I know for my son, it was the right choice. It definitely isn't flthe solution for all kids though.


Quoting melakay1981:

When I took my daughter to the psychiatrist he did not want to hear anything I had to say, he was only going off of the paperwork that the school sent him.  We where in the room for no more than 10 minutes and he had her diagnosed with ADHD and handed me a prescription for Adderall.  The whole situation just left a bad taste in my mouth over kids being diagnosed with ADHD.  I know not all Dr.s are like this, and most probably do extensive testing but this one didn't and I will admit that I am a little bitter about it.  It is hard for me not to think the way I do and I will admit that when I hear of someone saying that their kid is having attention/behavioral problems I do tend to make them aware that their are other things it could be.  It was never suggested to my cousin that her kid could have a food allergy from her sons Dr.  She did some research and decided to cut things out of his diet and see if it helped, here it was red dye that made him hyper.  She cut it out of his diet and he is doing 90% better than what he was. 



Quoting Kaybean:

I get what you're saying and no parent should medicate against their judgement because they feel forced. I'm not even saying her child does have ADHD or that she SHOULD medicate. All I'm saying is she should consider everything as a possibility. Parents may not "think" it's this or that, when it really is, just like a school may think it is when it isn't. Just for the record, I don't view my son as having a disability and either does his teacher. They get no benefits from him being diagnosed with it. He's in a regular class with no special ed or IEP of any kind. Again, all I'm saying is, she should at least consider each and every possibility out there. It could be ADHD, a food allergy, dyslexia, a vision problem, depression, anxiety or even something as unlikely as a brain tumor. No stone should go unturned.





Quoting melakay1981:

When I search statistics and talk to my daughters oncologist I get completely different numbers but that is not even the point to what I was saying.  I do not disagree with others parents medicating their kids.  The OP did say that the school is pushing for her child to be tested for ADHD and that is wrong in my opinion.  Did you know that schools get extra funding for kids with disabilities?  Did you know that they get a leeway on their standardized testing for each child with a disability?  I just worry that schools are pushing this on parents for these reasons.  She even said she felt backed in a corner as I did, I did not feel my daughter needed to be medicated and from the way the OP sounds she does not think her son needs to be medicated.  If it is working for your son that is great and I do not think it is bad for every kid, but there are some kids walking around out there that do not need it and the only reason the parents are medicating them is because they are afraid of the repercussions from the school if they don't do it.  I even read a blog a long time ago about a mother who was threatened by the school with cps if she did not medicate her child.  To me it is wrong.




Quoting Kaybean:

I just looked it up and it says that 1500 kids in the entire US are diagnosed with a brain tumor each year. That proves what I said that the reason for a child having difficulty in the class isn't typically because of a tumor. I realize that happened to YOUR dd, but that is very unlikely to be the case with others, considering it actually is quite rare. 1500 out of hundreds of thousands of kids isn't that much. With ADHD, nearly 1 in 10 kids is diagnosed with it. So ADHD is FAR more likely to be the issue. Now don't get me wrong, ADHD is diagnosed way too quickly and yes, some kids ARE diagnosed wrong, like your dd for example, but a brain tumor is NOT typical and the OP should not just assume ADHD can't be the cause. She should look at all possibilities before just ruling anything out. If she wanted to get her son checked for a brain tumor just to be sure, there's no harm in that either, but just because your dd had something rare, that doesn't mean ADHD shouldn't be looked into because that COULD very well be what her son has. Also, just because your dd didn't do well on the meds, doesn't mean other kids don't thrive off of it, like my 10 year old son for example.






Quoting melakay1981:



Things like this are more common than you realize.  I am not one to quote Dr. Phil or anything like that but prior to all of this I wondered why anytime there was a kid on his show misbehaving he always said they where going to send that child for a complete MRI of his brain.  I never realized how many kids in the world are suffering from brain tumors.  Most people with brain tumors die in their sleep and the family does not know until the autopsy report comes back.  I am not saying all kids that are diagnosed with ADHD have brain tumors, but I do wonder how many are walking around with one and on medication for ADHD.






Quoting Kaybean:

I'm sorry that happened to your dd, but that isn't typical. I know ADHD is diagnosed too quickly, but that shouldn't mean parents flat out refuse to consider it when their child is struggling. If a child is struggling, EVERY possibility should be considered. My oldest son has ADHD. They saw the signs when he was in preschool and his K, 1st, 2nd and 3rd teachers all said he same. In 3rd grade, we finally decided to have him tested for ADHD and not only did his pediatrician agree, so did we. We first tried stress balls and certain things and jt didn't work. Then we tried a natural ADHD diet and supplements and that didn't work and we finally resorted to Adderall when he fell so far behind in 3rd grade,fever. He's in 5th grade now and is doing amazing. The meds made a night and day difference for him. My point is, Adderall isn't all bad. It really can be great for some kids, and she should cinsider all possibilities and not just automatically rule anything out. My son has zero issues with Adderall. No sweats, no headaches, nothing.




Quoting melakay1981:



If you do not feel he has ADHD do not even waste your time getting him tested.  The school tried pulling the same crap with my daughter when she was in 2nd grade.  I took her to see a psychiatrist and they gave me a prescription for Adderall.  I gave her one pill and I said I would NEVER give her another one.  She woke up sweating like crazy and she looked higher than a kite.  The only reason I did it was because I felt backed in a corner by the school, I pushed back and they finally left me alone about it.  3 years later we found out what was causing the behavioral problems....Oh she only had a cancerous brain tumor growing in her head.  Yeah everyone said she had ADHD.  They removed the tumor and all the problems disappeared.  I just wonder what effect the medication could have had on the tumor if I would have continued giving it to her.







Quoting Anonymous:

She suggested it to me as well early I the school year and I refused. But at a parent teacher conference last week she has been writing stuff down he's doing. And honestly I'm scared she'll say I'm not helping him tonight fullest advantage. So I'll get him tested but he's NOT going on meds. I'm sorry I can't give my baby boy meds I give to 70 yr old ppl with hight blood pressure. Can't do it! Creating a routine w him and getting him involved in more social settings is what I want to try. And also a lot less video games.... :\





Quoting Anonymous:

Thanks. good luck to you also. My son's teacher in the beginning of the year mentioned adhd testing and I flat out refused. I told her no. we aren't going to medicate him for something one person believes he has. Not to mention boss are taught from an early age to be rowdy and rambunctious.









Quoting Anonymous:

I know how you feel! My son is also 7 and in 1st grade he isn't so much behind. But he's having trouble focusing and staying on task :( makes me sad. His teacher and I are what seems like in constant communication and she suggest I get him tested for ADHD (of course). My aunt is a teacher and so were my grandparents and they think he's bored but idk... It's so hard!! I don't want him falling behind and he isn't as if now but I need to figure out something to help him. As a nurse I'd rather not put him on meds. I'm just honesty lost Good luck to you!! :)
































Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
melakay1981
by Platinum Member on Feb. 14, 2013 at 1:01 AM
1 mom liked this

I am glad that it is working for your son.  A good friend of mine ended up having to do the same thing for her little boy and it worked wonders for him.  I do not judge anyone for medicating their child, most parents want the best for their children :)


Quoting Kaybean:

Yeah, I don't like that either. Even with my son having ADHD, I still hate how overly diagnosed it is and how quick people are to try and drug a child because they don't want to deal with them. We did try cutting things out, putting him on a soecial diet and adding supplements and after 2 months of trying it, we realized it wasn't working. My brother was put on Ritalin in middle school and hated how he felt on it and it left a bad taste in his mouth about ADHD and medication as well and in turn, he judged my decision to put my son on Adderall, but I know for my son, it was the right choice. It definitely isn't flthe solution for all kids though.


Quoting melakay1981:

When I took my daughter to the psychiatrist he did not want to hear anything I had to say, he was only going off of the paperwork that the school sent him.  We where in the room for no more than 10 minutes and he had her diagnosed with ADHD and handed me a prescription for Adderall.  The whole situation just left a bad taste in my mouth over kids being diagnosed with ADHD.  I know not all Dr.s are like this, and most probably do extensive testing but this one didn't and I will admit that I am a little bitter about it.  It is hard for me not to think the way I do and I will admit that when I hear of someone saying that their kid is having attention/behavioral problems I do tend to make them aware that their are other things it could be.  It was never suggested to my cousin that her kid could have a food allergy from her sons Dr.  She did some research and decided to cut things out of his diet and see if it helped, here it was red dye that made him hyper.  She cut it out of his diet and he is doing 90% better than what he was. 



Quoting Kaybean:

I get what you're saying and no parent should medicate against their judgement because they feel forced. I'm not even saying her child does have ADHD or that she SHOULD medicate. All I'm saying is she should consider everything as a possibility. Parents may not "think" it's this or that, when it really is, just like a school may think it is when it isn't. Just for the record, I don't view my son as having a disability and either does his teacher. They get no benefits from him being diagnosed with it. He's in a regular class with no special ed or IEP of any kind. Again, all I'm saying is, she should at least consider each and every possibility out there. It could be ADHD, a food allergy, dyslexia, a vision problem, depression, anxiety or even something as unlikely as a brain tumor. No stone should go unturned.





Quoting melakay1981:

When I search statistics and talk to my daughters oncologist I get completely different numbers but that is not even the point to what I was saying.  I do not disagree with others parents medicating their kids.  The OP did say that the school is pushing for her child to be tested for ADHD and that is wrong in my opinion.  Did you know that schools get extra funding for kids with disabilities?  Did you know that they get a leeway on their standardized testing for each child with a disability?  I just worry that schools are pushing this on parents for these reasons.  She even said she felt backed in a corner as I did, I did not feel my daughter needed to be medicated and from the way the OP sounds she does not think her son needs to be medicated.  If it is working for your son that is great and I do not think it is bad for every kid, but there are some kids walking around out there that do not need it and the only reason the parents are medicating them is because they are afraid of the repercussions from the school if they don't do it.  I even read a blog a long time ago about a mother who was threatened by the school with cps if she did not medicate her child.  To me it is wrong.




Quoting Kaybean:

I just looked it up and it says that 1500 kids in the entire US are diagnosed with a brain tumor each year. That proves what I said that the reason for a child having difficulty in the class isn't typically because of a tumor. I realize that happened to YOUR dd, but that is very unlikely to be the case with others, considering it actually is quite rare. 1500 out of hundreds of thousands of kids isn't that much. With ADHD, nearly 1 in 10 kids is diagnosed with it. So ADHD is FAR more likely to be the issue. Now don't get me wrong, ADHD is diagnosed way too quickly and yes, some kids ARE diagnosed wrong, like your dd for example, but a brain tumor is NOT typical and the OP should not just assume ADHD can't be the cause. She should look at all possibilities before just ruling anything out. If she wanted to get her son checked for a brain tumor just to be sure, there's no harm in that either, but just because your dd had something rare, that doesn't mean ADHD shouldn't be looked into because that COULD very well be what her son has. Also, just because your dd didn't do well on the meds, doesn't mean other kids don't thrive off of it, like my 10 year old son for example.






Quoting melakay1981:



Things like this are more common than you realize.  I am not one to quote Dr. Phil or anything like that but prior to all of this I wondered why anytime there was a kid on his show misbehaving he always said they where going to send that child for a complete MRI of his brain.  I never realized how many kids in the world are suffering from brain tumors.  Most people with brain tumors die in their sleep and the family does not know until the autopsy report comes back.  I am not saying all kids that are diagnosed with ADHD have brain tumors, but I do wonder how many are walking around with one and on medication for ADHD.






Quoting Kaybean:

I'm sorry that happened to your dd, but that isn't typical. I know ADHD is diagnosed too quickly, but that shouldn't mean parents flat out refuse to consider it when their child is struggling. If a child is struggling, EVERY possibility should be considered. My oldest son has ADHD. They saw the signs when he was in preschool and his K, 1st, 2nd and 3rd teachers all said he same. In 3rd grade, we finally decided to have him tested for ADHD and not only did his pediatrician agree, so did we. We first tried stress balls and certain things and jt didn't work. Then we tried a natural ADHD diet and supplements and that didn't work and we finally resorted to Adderall when he fell so far behind in 3rd grade,fever. He's in 5th grade now and is doing amazing. The meds made a night and day difference for him. My point is, Adderall isn't all bad. It really can be great for some kids, and she should cinsider all possibilities and not just automatically rule anything out. My son has zero issues with Adderall. No sweats, no headaches, nothing.




Quoting melakay1981:



If you do not feel he has ADHD do not even waste your time getting him tested.  The school tried pulling the same crap with my daughter when she was in 2nd grade.  I took her to see a psychiatrist and they gave me a prescription for Adderall.  I gave her one pill and I said I would NEVER give her another one.  She woke up sweating like crazy and she looked higher than a kite.  The only reason I did it was because I felt backed in a corner by the school, I pushed back and they finally left me alone about it.  3 years later we found out what was causing the behavioral problems....Oh she only had a cancerous brain tumor growing in her head.  Yeah everyone said she had ADHD.  They removed the tumor and all the problems disappeared.  I just wonder what effect the medication could have had on the tumor if I would have continued giving it to her.







Quoting Anonymous:

She suggested it to me as well early I the school year and I refused. But at a parent teacher conference last week she has been writing stuff down he's doing. And honestly I'm scared she'll say I'm not helping him tonight fullest advantage. So I'll get him tested but he's NOT going on meds. I'm sorry I can't give my baby boy meds I give to 70 yr old ppl with hight blood pressure. Can't do it! Creating a routine w him and getting him involved in more social settings is what I want to try. And also a lot less video games.... :\





Quoting Anonymous:

Thanks. good luck to you also. My son's teacher in the beginning of the year mentioned adhd testing and I flat out refused. I told her no. we aren't going to medicate him for something one person believes he has. Not to mention boss are taught from an early age to be rowdy and rambunctious.









Quoting Anonymous:

I know how you feel! My son is also 7 and in 1st grade he isn't so much behind. But he's having trouble focusing and staying on task :( makes me sad. His teacher and I are what seems like in constant communication and she suggest I get him tested for ADHD (of course). My aunt is a teacher and so were my grandparents and they think he's bored but idk... It's so hard!! I don't want him falling behind and he isn't as if now but I need to figure out something to help him. As a nurse I'd rather not put him on meds. I'm just honesty lost Good luck to you!! :)


































Bird16_J
by on Feb. 14, 2013 at 1:03 AM

Well I can't for sure for you and your son but I ended up having to hold my daughter back in Kindergarten because she missed half the year (she has autism and adhd and we spent more than half the year trying to get her meds adjusted for her and was in her specials class and spent majority of the time there instad of in her general education class) her twin sister moved to 1st. It was seriously an agonizing decision for me to do. I talked with EVERYBODY including my husband (their stepfather) because I just was torn no what to do. (their father really isn't in the picture) I finally decided that it was more important for her to repeat and learn what she needed too instead of putting her in an environment where she doesn't know what's going on and gets lost in the system. I won't allow that to happen. I guess if you don't want to hold him back try a tutor or something like that. Good luck!


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