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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Turns out, my inconsiderate neighbor has downs syndrome...

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 33 Replies

I've posted in here before about how loud and annoying my apartment neighbor has been and have ranted and raved about how inconsiderate they are with their music. I've called the apartments on them, banged on the walls, and have done everything but personally approach them about their loud music disturbing my household.

I've noticed that the music plays at the exact same time every single day. Well yesterday I'd had it and was already having a bad day. I bundled my kids up and walked behind my apartment to confront this loud neighbor. It wasn't hard to figure out which neighbor it was because the screens on her window were vibrating. I knocked on the door several times. It was so loud her DOG couldn't even hear me. I finally got the dogs attention, and she answered the door once she heard the dog barking.

I was expecting some teenaged smart-mouthed punk to answer the door, but instead it was this confused looking woman who had all the physical features of a person with downs syndrome. I'm no doctor and I'll admit that this is totally my assumption, so I don't know for sure. She didn't understand why the music was affecting me so negatively. I managed to calm down before speaking to her and let her know that the music was too loud, and was scaring my toddler (he thinks there are monsters trying to come through the walls) and making it difficult for my teething baby (hence the stress) to sleep. She looked... confused and really upset (almost pained) that I'd asked her to turn it down and was very reluctant to do so. She made a statement that she didn't mean any harm and was persistant in letting me know that it was Christian music.

I did thank her, but I'm just a little confused. I am completely ignorant when it comes to confronting someone with a disability. My husband explained to me that she probably is high functioning and the loud music is a part of her routine. Now I feel like an asshole for interfering with her routine, but I should have peace in my own home.

So tell me, am I out of line? I'm at a loss here...

Posted by Anonymous on Feb. 13, 2013 at 3:55 PM
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Anonymous
by Anonymous on Feb. 13, 2013 at 4:47 PM
6 moms liked this
Your not out of line, your husband is correct it is probably routine for her. She just doesn't understand if you have to talk to her again just explain the same way as calm ad possible it might take a couple times for her to get it.
Tal0n
by Platinum Member on Feb. 13, 2013 at 4:49 PM
3 moms liked this

You're not out of line, part of learning to live independently is learning that what you do affects people not in your direct line of contact.  Be patient, but don't let it go.  IF she keeps playing the music, you might call the police, explain the situation and maybe they have someone who can talk to her. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Feb. 13, 2013 at 6:59 PM

Thanks. I was worried I'd upset her. I've never been in thiss situation before.

Quoting Anonymous:

Your not out of line, your husband is correct it is probably routine for her. She just doesn't understand if you have to talk to her again just explain the same way as calm ad possible it might take a couple times for her to get it.


 

critter_boo
by Silver Member on Feb. 13, 2013 at 7:01 PM
You probaly didn't upset her just confused her


Quoting Anonymous:

Thanks. I was worried I'd upset her. I've never been in thiss situation before.


Quoting Anonymous:

Your not out of line, your husband is correct it is probably routine for her. She just doesn't understand if you have to talk to her again just explain the same way as calm ad possible it might take a couple times for her to get it.



 


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Anonymous
by Anonymous on Feb. 13, 2013 at 7:05 PM
She has a right to have peace in her home too. I remember having a neighbor whose kid would cry bloody fucking murder for 2 hours straight every night. Now that was a bitch. I just dealt with it. I'm sure I did shit people didn't like. That's how it goes in apartments. Unless they're breaking noise laws then I just say live and let live.
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Feb. 13, 2013 at 11:57 PM
1 mom liked this

 

Lol a picture fell off of my wall due to how loud it was. Her screens were practically bouncing off her windows. Her dog couldn't even hear me knocking as loud as I could. I'm pretty sure that qualifies as breaking noise laws. When everything in my home is shaking and rattling, it's way too loud.

Quoting Anonymous:

She has a right to have peace in her home too. I remember having a neighbor whose kid would cry bloody fucking murder for 2 hours straight every night. Now that was a bitch. I just dealt with it. I'm sure I did shit people didn't like. That's how it goes in apartments. Unless they're breaking noise laws then I just say live and let live.

 

 

opinionatedmom
by Platinum Member on Feb. 14, 2013 at 12:00 AM

 buy her some headphones you both get what you want

LiliM
by Gold Member on Feb. 14, 2013 at 12:02 AM

If it persists, go to the landlord or the super.  I am sure he/she has contact info for someone who can help adjust the routine.  It probably is routine, and the level of noise may be needed for her.  Which means she either needs to turn it down, or get headphones. 

Whoever said it above has it right - part of learning to live independantly means that you learn that you are not your own little island.  If she is able to function enough to live on her own, she can learn to live with neighbors.

And if it doesn't stop, hell yes call the cops.  Noise violations are one of my pet peeves.  I used to have neighbors that partied until 3 in the morning.  I just started calling the cops.

They're done by 9:30 on weekdays, and 10 on weekends with the really noisy bits.


amy1will
by Amethyst on Feb. 14, 2013 at 12:08 AM
People with Down Syndrome don't like having there routine messed up. It does through them off. My son has Down Syndrome and he cant have his daily routine messed up. If it is he is off balance for awhile.

You are not out of line though because you do need to have peace and quite.
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Nonobeth
by Bronze Member on Feb. 14, 2013 at 12:11 AM


Yeah!!

Quoting opinionatedmom:

 buy her some headphones you both get what you want



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