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DD's teacher ignored... *edited*

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My daughter is sensitive to red dye. It makes her crazy. It makes her hyperactive & emotional as all get out. It brings about tantrums and is just generally unpleasant. Any amount of it seems to set her off. We've discussed this with her teacher (who has seen what it does to her) and requested she not give her food or drinks containing it. Today, being Valentine's day, we knew her class would be filled with it. We sent apple juice, rice krispy treats and cookies that she could have. We even sent a bag of dye free lolly pops, in case they had candy in class. When I picked DD up today the teacher said "DD did really well today. She said you told her she could have a little bit if red dye so she just chose a few of her favorites." I was LIVID. I get my kid lied and I dealt with that but she believed a 5 year old. If I say my kid can't have something don't you think it's common sense to check before believing (in the face of temptation) that something changed? I know it's not an allergy in a medical sense and no health problems follow a slip up but the teachers irresponsibility has me so mad. DH says I need to let it go but I really want to schedule a conference and tell the teacher how angry I am and how wrong she was. What if it could have had medical consequences? we trust this lady to keep her safe. if it were your kid what would you do?





*edit* The red dye allergy, along with several other food allergies are on her medical forms, on file at the school. We send lunch, snacks, treats etc so the teacher doesn't have to read labels and guess. My daughter was in the wrong for lying and faced several consequences for it. Believe me, little bit answered for her part in things. She had to write a note to the teacher admitting that she did not tell the truth, explain what prompted her to lie and tell how she could be assured she wouldn't do so again. She had to sit out at our Valentines tea party this evening too. This mama doesn't mess around with lying. The reason I am upset is I feel like the teacher who I trust and pay to supervise my child failed to do so. Fortunately this allergy wasn't deadly, for her, others could be.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
by on Feb. 14, 2013 at 7:04 PM
Replies (11-20):
Devious333
by Ruby Member on Feb. 14, 2013 at 7:11 PM
My little brother is the same way with red dyes. I would tell your dd it was wrong to lie but I would also talk to the teacher about using common sense.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Aleta775
by on Feb. 14, 2013 at 7:14 PM

This. It would be a completely different situation if this was a life threatening allergy. I think the teacher would know better in that sort of situation. However, lots of people fudge a little bit dietary wise when it comes to certain things. It is possible that the teacher thought that you had given your dd permission to try a few things with red dye since it is sort of a holiday. There are a lot of people willing to break their own rules, or the rules for their kids once in a while when it comes to food. 

Just inform the teacher that your dd was not honest with her, and that in this case there is no fudging of the rules or exceptions. Then I would drop it. 

Quoting Cmgmqmmom:

I was the same way with red dye as a child. I would practically climb walls I was so hyper.

That being said, I think you need to drop it. Your daughter was not in any danger. She wasn't going to die from the food. If you think it needs to be addressed, a simple, calm letter just reminding the teacher that it causes her to be hyper would be sufficient. Why make it a big deal?

Now, if the same teacher does it again, I'd say make a bigger deal of it.

That's just my honest opinion. Good luck!


Anonymous
by Anonymous on Feb. 14, 2013 at 7:14 PM
1 mom liked this
To me its not a big deal...I honestly don't believe in that red dye is the cause of children acting like brats. Lack of discipline though definately is the the cause. Had my DD lied to the teacher I would be upset with her and not the teacher. My DD would be punished and would be apologizing to the teacher for being a liar
theresaphilly
by Gold Member on Feb. 14, 2013 at 7:14 PM



Quoting anotherhalf:

I would just tell her that dd lied and you will never give her permission to have red dye and leave it at that.



Dqnana
by Member on Feb. 14, 2013 at 7:15 PM
By all means schedule a conference ... but do NOT go while you are angry. The teacher made a mistake ... and so did your daughter ... but your daughter behaved WELL!! Make yourself clear and then let it go.
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Feb. 14, 2013 at 7:16 PM
1 mom liked this
You are overreacting big time. The only one at fault is your DD for lying. As you said, this is not a medical situation just an annoyance.
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Feb. 14, 2013 at 7:16 PM

Drop it. It's not an allergy. I'm sure you just didn't want ot deal with a hyper kid.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Feb. 14, 2013 at 7:17 PM


My children also have a red dye allergy and it's a bitch to deal with. You clearly have no idea.

Quoting Anonymous:

Oh boy here we go again. So was she a raging little princess when she got home?



Anonymous
by Anonymous on Feb. 14, 2013 at 7:17 PM
You are ridiculous.
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Feb. 14, 2013 at 7:18 PM

OMG. You have NO idea what you're talking about! Red dye most certainly CAN make a child act crazy. It's awful. I had it as a kid and my children have it now. It's not a discpline problem at all. 

Do some research before you make generalizations.

Quoting Anonymous:

To me its not a big deal...I honestly don't believe in that red dye is the cause of children acting like brats. Lack of discipline though definately is the the cause. Had my DD lied to the teacher I would be upset with her and not the teacher. My DD would be punished and would be apologizing to the teacher for being a liar



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