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idk what to do

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

I have no idea what to do, ds wants his friend to sleep over but dh doesnt want him to. his reasons are crazy. the kid is from the projects and dh doesn't like that. he said we need to know the parents and he isnt sure he wants to mingle with people like that. he doesnt mind that ds is friends with the kid, he just said that the parents are probably scum and he that if ds wants to sleep over there he would never ever approve of it. from what i have seen, the kid is really good and ds gets on well with him. but dh is concerned about the parents and where the kid is from

Posted by Anonymous on Feb. 16, 2013 at 9:46 AM
Replies (41-50):
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Feb. 16, 2013 at 10:25 AM

 i said i wanted to invite them over for coffee so we can meet them. I dont want ds spending the night there because it is pretty rough there but i see no problems with him staying here. I just want to make sure the parents are good people first

Quoting Lizardannie1966:

Definitely go meet the parent's of this other boy (even have them over to your home, so they can see where their child might spend the night). This way, they can also get to know you and your Dh a little and be assured that their child will be safe and have a good time if the boy's are given the green light for the sleepover.

Too, maybe it will hopefully help your husband to learn not to make a snap judgement of people before he meets them.

 

Lizardannie1966
by on Feb. 16, 2013 at 10:26 AM
1 mom liked this

lol This has nothing to do with how well your husband is able to provide for his family. That's his responsibility to begin with.

However, when he's already referring to the family of this boy as "scum" before meeting them and based on having worked in the area of where that boy lives, perhaps the time is NOW for your husband to learn to give people a chance?

Quoting Anonymous:

 hey that judgemental asshole provides very well for his family and is worried about their safety and who they hang around with. that judgemental asshole used to work where that kid lives and has seen first hand that types that live out there.

Quoting Anonymous:

Invite the kid over - let him see a Judgmental Asshole lives.



Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Feb. 16, 2013 at 10:26 AM

 I agree!

Quoting Anonymous:

I can understand not wanting your kid over there, not wanting to become best friends, but go to say "hi, we just wanted to meet face to face before we let your son spend the night" is not a big deal IMO. Then again where I grew up we were a middle class everyday family, but much of the surrounding areas of the city were very poor. It's not something that makes me uncomfortable. Usually if the kid is a good kid at least one parent is doing alright kwim?

Quoting Anonymous:

 not a brat LOL but i can see his worry. what if they turn out to be these ghetto druggies that are completely awful i know that may not be the case, they can be the best people in the world and we may not even know it. (dh isnt a people person to begin with lol)



Quoting Anonymous:

Just arrange to meet the parents when you know DH will be there, he's acting like a brat.


 

 

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Feb. 16, 2013 at 10:27 AM

 he didnt say that, he said he is concerned because most of the families that live out there are scum.

Quoting Lizardannie1966:

lol This has nothing to do with how well your husband is able to provide for his family. That's his responsibility to begin with.

However, when he's already referring to the family of this boy as "scum" before meeting them and based on having worked in the area of where that boy lives, perhaps the time is NOW for your husband to learn to give people a chance?

Quoting Anonymous:

 hey that judgemental asshole provides very well for his family and is worried about their safety and who they hang around with. that judgemental asshole used to work where that kid lives and has seen first hand that types that live out there.

Quoting Anonymous:

Invite the kid over - let him see a Judgmental Asshole lives.

 


 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Feb. 16, 2013 at 10:28 AM
Well at least you can acknowledge the obvious.

We understand that your Johnny isn't good enough to be friends with just anyone.


Quoting Anonymous:

 hey that judgemental asshole provides very well for his family and is worried about their safety and who they hang around with. that judgemental asshole used to work where that kid lives and has seen first hand that types that live out there.


Quoting Anonymous:

Invite the kid over - let him see a Judgmental Asshole lives.

 


Lizardannie1966
by on Feb. 16, 2013 at 10:28 AM

I can understand about your son staying over there, to a degree.

Just be prepared to have to explain *why* possibly if an invite is extended by them (and they like you and trust you), especially if the boy's are wondering why it's an automatic no.

Quoting Anonymous:

 i said i wanted to invite them over for coffee so we can meet them. I dont want ds spending the night there because it is pretty rough there but i see no problems with him staying here. I just want to make sure the parents are good people first

Quoting Lizardannie1966:

Definitely go meet the parent's of this other boy (even have them over to your home, so they can see where their child might spend the night). This way, they can also get to know you and your Dh a little and be assured that their child will be safe and have a good time if the boy's are given the green light for the sleepover.

Too, maybe it will hopefully help your husband to learn not to make a snap judgement of people before he meets them.



Anonymous
by Anonymous 6 on Feb. 16, 2013 at 10:30 AM

 What an arrogant ass you married.

Lizardannie1966
by on Feb. 16, 2013 at 10:30 AM

Fair enough.

However, he is making a judgement call of the possible TYPE of people they can be and based on what he believes about the people that "live out there."

Quoting Anonymous:

 he didnt say that, he said he is concerned because most of the families that live out there are scum.

Quoting Lizardannie1966:

lol This has nothing to do with how well your husband is able to provide for his family. That's his responsibility to begin with.

However, when he's already referring to the family of this boy as "scum" before meeting them and based on having worked in the area of where that boy lives, perhaps the time is NOW for your husband to learn to give people a chance?

Quoting Anonymous:

 hey that judgemental asshole provides very well for his family and is worried about their safety and who they hang around with. that judgemental asshole used to work where that kid lives and has seen first hand that types that live out there.

Quoting Anonymous:

Invite the kid over - let him see a Judgmental Asshole lives.





Anonymous
by Anonymous 7 on Feb. 16, 2013 at 10:31 AM
Maybe they don't want their kid to sleep over at a home where the patents are uppity judgemental dicks.
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Feb. 16, 2013 at 10:32 AM

 that can be a sticky situation, but if the parents are good people and i know that my son will  be safe with them, it may not even be an issue...

Quoting Lizardannie1966:

I can understand about your son staying over there, to a degree.

Just be prepared to have to explain *why* possibly if an invite is extended by them (and they like you and trust you), especially if the boy's are wondering why it's an automatic no.

Quoting Anonymous:

 i said i wanted to invite them over for coffee so we can meet them. I dont want ds spending the night there because it is pretty rough there but i see no problems with him staying here. I just want to make sure the parents are good people first

Quoting Lizardannie1966:

Definitely go meet the parent's of this other boy (even have them over to your home, so they can see where their child might spend the night). This way, they can also get to know you and your Dh a little and be assured that their child will be safe and have a good time if the boy's are given the green light for the sleepover.

Too, maybe it will hopefully help your husband to learn not to make a snap judgement of people before he meets them.

 


 

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