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Does anyone else feel that sometimes it is understandable that a woman just wants her mom there not her MIL?

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 29 Replies

 

Poll

Question: Does anyone else feel that sometimes it is understandable that a woman just wants her mom there not her MIL?

Options:

Yes, I belive there are cetain times where this is understandable like during labor and delivery

no, it is never understandable


Only group members can vote in this poll.

Total Votes: 73

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And I am asking this as a mother of 2 girls and 3 boys, don't you think that there are times where it it understandable that a woman wants her mom around but not her MIL. I mean I know some MILs and DIL are very close but as for me, when I had my kids, I wanted my mom in the room but I didn't want to see any of my in laws until I had been cleaned up and covered up.

This is somewhat in repsose to the post about the woman wanting to wait to have vistiors after her child is born but still wanting her mom in the deliver room.

For me, I think MILs should be understanding that their DILs may not be as comforatble with them as they are with their own moms and if they are not, that should be ok.

Posted by Anonymous on Feb. 16, 2013 at 10:30 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Feb. 16, 2013 at 10:31 PM
2 moms liked this

I didn't even want my own mother. Not going to have my MIL, that's for sure.

Derari
by :::Achtung::: on Feb. 16, 2013 at 10:34 PM

I think sons should help their mom's understand this too...and mil's can be explained all of this gently...although, if they had daughters too, they hold understand that their own daughters might not want mil around either;)

babid14
by on Feb. 16, 2013 at 10:34 PM
I think they should understand to. The one giving birth may noy feel comfortable with some people seeing her like that.
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KristenFowles
by Ruby Member on Feb. 16, 2013 at 10:34 PM

Yes.  Absolutely.

Jcothrine
by on Feb. 16, 2013 at 10:34 PM

i would never have had my first mother in law in there with me.. but my mother in law i have now is really cool and if her son and i had bio-kids together i would have let her come in.... i think..

and really i would probably want her there as her son would probably be at a bar drinking if i had his baby. at least that is what he always told me he'd be doing if i had a baby...lol. he doesn't believe in men being in the delivery room unless they are the doctor.. lol... he is a scaredy cat.. well in this regard anyway...

JC

robyann
by on Feb. 16, 2013 at 10:35 PM

I do think that should be ok. I was in the delivery room with my dd having her 4 kids, my ds1's wife wasn't comfortable, so I didn't go until the next day. My ds2's gf was fine with me being there so I was. It's not about the mother or mil, it's about you, the one having the baby, and whatever makes you most comfortable should be done. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Feb. 16, 2013 at 10:36 PM

 Being in labor is a personal time. You should have whomever you are comfortable with in the room.

If MIL doesn't understand, she will in time. Betcha she has a MIL too, remind her kindly about that :)

ilovemykids323
by Ruby Member on Feb. 16, 2013 at 10:36 PM

 I'd rather have my MIL in the room than my own mom... ugh. But i have a better relationship with my MIL.... I dont thin kshe would want to be in the room though lol... and i'm fine with that. and yes the MIL should just get over it if the DIL doesn't want her in there.

wooly
by Knitting Maniac on Feb. 16, 2013 at 10:38 PM

 I purposely scheduled my arrival to see my newest grandson a couple of weeks after he was born to give my son & his wife time to bond and also to let her mother come and be with my DIL and so she didn't have to worry about having us both there at the same time. Instead I got a phone call asking mke to come early. My DIl wound up needing a C-section and to my surprise didn't want her mother there. She asked my son to call me and see how fast I could get there. So, I was on a plane the next day.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Feb. 16, 2013 at 10:38 PM

My MIL was pissed that I wouldn't let her in the delivery room but had my mom in there. Her mom got in her face and told her to shut up because she had refused to let anyone in when she gave birth. It shut her up. Thank goodness.

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