Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

I would like your opinion on a situation ladies.

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

My husband invited his friends over to spend their vacation at our house without asking me first. They live in another country and ask him if they could come over. He just informed me.

I told him that wasn't acceptable and even if he was sure that I would say yes he should have told me before he agreed. His answer was I am the chief of this family and  if you want equality you have to pay your half of the bills.

I work part time and give him one of my checks. But he does not shut up about me not paying enough bills in the house. I am really tired of this. I take care of the kids , the cleaning, all the kids expenses.

I am overreacting? Is it too much to ask him to at least ask me first? They will be strangers living with me and my kids for about a month and I don't even have a say in it because I don't pay the mortgage?


Posted by Anonymous on Feb. 18, 2013 at 10:49 AM
Replies (11-20):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Feb. 18, 2013 at 10:58 AM

If this is the first time that you are realizing you have a problem, your head has been in the sand far too long.

Buggy979
by Platinum Member on Feb. 18, 2013 at 10:59 AM
4 moms liked this
I would have looked at him and said well if we were to get a divorce then why is it everything that is yours is half mine in a court of law?
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Sassy762
by CAFE SASSY HBIC on Feb. 18, 2013 at 11:00 AM
3 moms liked this

He is an ASS......

Tell Dickhead that if he wants you to be equal in the money department then you demand that he share the household chores (cooking/cleaning), care of the children equally (50/50) as well THEN you will  be able to get a job so you can contribute to the money  well

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Feb. 18, 2013 at 11:02 AM

Thank you for your reply. I would have probably said yes if he had asked me. But he set a principle.To years ago he refused that my brother stays at our house because My brother didn't call him directly. So to avoid any further trouble in my marriage my brother stayed at a hotel. So I told him his principle should be applied to his friends too. I just want him to know that as you said WE should BOTH be able to invite whomever we like.

For the bills we both agreed that I would work less because we have young kids and split the charges. I don't know why he keeps bringing it up every single time I ask him to show me respect.

Thank you again for your reply.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 6 on Feb. 18, 2013 at 11:03 AM

I make just as much as DH, but if I didn't he would never say that to me. I would have told your DH he can go back with his damn friends when they leave. I would be more mad at him telling me I don't have equal say than inviting strangers in my house.

armstrong7984
by on Feb. 18, 2013 at 11:03 AM
1 mom liked this

What is up with all these POS Hubbys and SO's today!? i cant believe ppl stay married to ppl like this.

iwillstapleyou
by on Feb. 18, 2013 at 11:05 AM
Now you know where you stand in the order of things, at least in his eyes. It's up to you to decide what you're going to do with that information.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
armstrong7984
by on Feb. 18, 2013 at 11:05 AM
1 mom liked this

 

cause he doesnt see you as an equal and doesnt have respect for you or your oppinions. and you let him get away with it, you teach people how to treat you.

Quoting Anonymous:

Thank you for your reply. I would have probably said yes if he had asked me. But he set a principle.To years ago he refused that my brother stays at our house because My brother didn't call him directly. So to avoid any further trouble in my marriage my brother stayed at a hotel. So I told him his principle should be applied to his friends too. I just want him to know that as you said WE should BOTH be able to invite whomever we like.

For the bills we both agreed that I would work less because we have young kids and split the charges. I don't know why he keeps bringing it up every single time I ask him to show me respect.

Thank you again for your reply.

 


 

momof2little1s
by Silver Member on Feb. 18, 2013 at 11:05 AM
That is not right. In a healthy marraige it's your money not my money regardless of who makes more.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous 7 on Feb. 18, 2013 at 11:08 AM
My dh has only bitched about my contribution to the household once. I calmly told him, he was welcome to start helping with 50% of the house and childcare, and I would contribute half of the money. He laughed and wasnt interested. So I submitted a bill for my time for the month, and a letter of resignation. Then I called and hired a cleaning service, cook and high end nanny. Lmao





He never complained again.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)