Is suicide always selfish? ETA/ decided to share my story and why I attempted suicide
What makes it selfish?
Someone told me that it's selfish because you are leaving behind people who will Grieve for you.
But what about when you don't have anyone that will grieve for you?
I attempted suicide at the age of 12.
Had I succeeded, no one would've grieved for me.
What wouldve made that selfish?
When I was 8 my mom remarried.
I did not like her new husband, and did not feel comfortable around him.
He would watch me bathe. Insist in helping me dress. Etc. he never molested me though.
At 10 both he and my mom were drinking heavily, and I learned be was a registered as offender,
He took off and came back. Took off and came back, over and over again.
We moved to a trailer park and my mom
Was always drunk.
She often told me how much she hated me. She'd throw anything she could get her hands on,
Shortly after I turned 12 I was raped.
My mother did not believe me. A report was never made. That bigt I attempted to hang myself from the ceiling fan in my room.
I woke up several hours later on the floor.
After that I started cutting.
At 14 1/2 I met a guy. My first boyfriend. Who was a former cutter.
He tried to convince me stop.
2 months before I turned 16 I found out I was pregnant.
I stopped cutting for the sake of my baby.
My mother never knew I was pregnant. I packed up after a fight one day and never went back.
She didn't report me as a runaway or anything.
I stayed with my boyfriend and his father.
we portioned for permission to marry. They tracked my mom down she consented and we got married.
Our daughter was Born.
We both graduated early.
we have a beautiful daughter.
I am so thankful that I failed but also at the same time do not see that I was being selfish at that point.