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Im listening to my iPod at full blast to drown out my child's crying. *etu*

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

He's 7, not a baby.  And he problems with sassing back lately.  Just constantly being contrary and sassing back.

Today I told him he needed to get out of the bath.  He sweetly asked for more time, I said 5mins.  He asked for more.  I said ok.

25mins later I said "ok sweets, time to get out"

he replied with "no! I will not! I say when I get out NOT YOU!"

Well then.  I took the plug. Said sternly without yelling "you will get out this instant and get dressed young man." and walked out.

He got out, got dressed. I tucked him in and let him know since he was so ungrateful for the extra 25mins I gave him, I would be taking the time back by not reading him a story.  I reminded him if he escalated so would his consequence.

He is now in his room screaming and crying how he hates me, trying to bait me but not leaving his room. 

So Im listening to music instead of him hoping he falls asleep and feeling frustrated, mean and exhausted.


EDIT:

I want to thank all the moms who gave me such helpful suggestions and advice.  I used a timer tonight and explained the time would not be extended, that when it went off it was done.  When it went off I went in and took the plug and left him to come out on his own (he did in a reasonable time, after doing the butt slide thing lol).

He went to bed without arguments, escalation or battles.  

The timer and no negotiation suggestions were life savers, thanks to the 2 moms that made those suggestions! You guys rock!

Posted by Anonymous on Feb. 18, 2013 at 9:53 PM
Replies (11-20):
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Feb. 18, 2013 at 9:58 PM

Did you spank him since he's screaming in his room? Hope your neighbors don't mind!

Quoting Anonymous:


I stopped giving him warnings because when I used to give them to him he would freak out.  I would tell hims top or such and such and he would do it to spite me.  Now he does not get a warning or told what the consequence is.  He is expected to just behave and learn from his mistakes.  

It actually has worked better and for the most part eliminated power struggles.

Quoting AutymsMommy:

You should have given him the possible consequence BEFORE implementing it - giving him time and a chance to change his behaviour.

So I disagree with what you did. Nothing personal though...




Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Feb. 18, 2013 at 9:59 PM


he wasnt punished for getting extra 25 mins, smh.

Quoting Anonymous:

i AGREE WITH THE FIRST COMMENTER, That was very immature of you to discipline him for you giving im extra time, it's not a punishment to let him have an extra 25 minutes in the tub and you get 25 minutes free!



mariesmama
by on Feb. 18, 2013 at 9:59 PM

i've been doing dishes my hands are pruney,so hubby gave our 3 yr old her bath tonight

LuLuThatsWho
by Platinum Member on Feb. 18, 2013 at 9:59 PM

You let him have his way 5 min at a time for 25 minutes.  Why on earth did you expect him to cooperate?  It sounds like for quite a long time he did, in fact, get to decide that he would not get out.

I don't blame you for punishing the smart mouth, but I also don't blame him for being totally confused.  Major mixed messages going on there.

HippiePotPie279
by on Feb. 18, 2013 at 10:00 PM

that's one of my favorites when I'm driving.

Quoting Anonymous:


Janis Joplin, piece of my heart 

Quoting HippiePotPie279:

he'll be alright. Glad to see not everyone on this site handles their kids like glass. lol...what song is playing right now?




jillbailey26
by Jill on Feb. 18, 2013 at 10:00 PM

If it were my kid, I'd go talk to him.  All that carrying on is a waste of time and energy.  If he has school tomorrow, he's just keeping himself up later and he may be a pain in the morning too.  So, I would discuss what happened, how to make it so it doesn't happen again, kiss him good night, and tell him it's time to settle down now.


"Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification"  Romans 14:19

momtolittleg
by Platinum Member on Feb. 18, 2013 at 10:00 PM

Been there. Sorry. They can truly test limits, can't they?

bowribbonmama
by Ruby Member on Feb. 18, 2013 at 10:00 PM
Did you not read the entire post? He is being disciplined for telling her that HE decides when he gets out, NOT her.

Quoting Anonymous:

i AGREE WITH THE FIRST COMMENTER, That was very immature of you to discipline him for you giving im extra time, it's not a punishment to let him have an extra 25 minutes in the tub and you get 25 minutes free!

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Feb. 18, 2013 at 10:01 PM


I didnt let him have his way for 5 minutes at a time for 25 minutes.  I think you misunderstood what you read.


Quoting LuLuThatsWho:

You let him have his way 5 min at a time for 25 minutes.  Why on earth did you expect him to cooperate?  It sounds like for quite a long time he did, in fact, get to decide that he would not get out.

I don't blame you for punishing the smart mouth, but I also don't blame him for being totally confused.  Major mixed messages going on there.



momtolittleg
by Platinum Member on Feb. 18, 2013 at 10:01 PM



Quoting Anonymous:

i AGREE WITH THE FIRST COMMENTER, That was very immature of you to discipline him for you giving im extra time, it's not a punishment to let him have an extra 25 minutes in the tub and you get 25 minutes free!


I believe the consequence was for sassing back, not the very liberal extra time. 

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