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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

My disgusting confession *Update*

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
And no, I do not want a cookie. No, not yay me; and no, I'm not proud. I'm confessing here because no one knows IRL and I need to somehow get it out.

I've been with my husband for almost 10 yrs, married for 6. I had always been faithful to him and always thought I would be. For some unknown reason, about 2.5 months ago I went out for ladies night and ended up bringing a guy home. My husband works late. It was a 1 night stand. It wasn't even really that great....but yet again, I did the same exact thing with someone different 2 weeks later. Again, not even great. Yet here I am, actually talking to another man whom I've been having an emotional fling with for the past month. I have planned for us to hook up next weekend.

Not sure what's wrong with me. I do love my husband, nobody is going to be able to tell me "well, if you love him, then you wouldn't be doing this." Not true. Its almost like I turn into a completely different person. I'm in mom/wife mode all day long, where I am reserved and on a scheduled routine. Then I talk and hook up with other men when I'm out of mom/ wife mode. I become a freak, and free spirited.

I think the worse part of my confession is that I have yet to feel guilty.

*update*
I'm now completely and utterly lost and my heart is broken. I've totally shattered my husband...
I emailed my therapist and wrote a quick summary about what's been going on with me. She wrote me back to schedule an apptt ASAP. I went yesterday. Basically, with telling her about my sexual and emotional affairs and looking through my past and knowing my character as a whole, she told me that she believes I have Bipolar and that I need to see a Psychiatrist to get my info and prescribe me meds. Apparently I was going through a manic episode. When I try and look back now, it almost feels physically impossible that that was me. Its almost a blur- far away distant memory that truthfully I barely remember...and it was only about 2 months ago that I had the sexual affairs. It was completely unlike me and goes against everything I believe in when it comes to my marriage with my husband. It just now seems unfathomable that it was me.... I'm now beyond depressed. More depressed than I've ever been in my entire life.
My therapist told me that I would be good to tell my husband about my recent impulses and behavior and to get him educated with Bipolar Disorder. So....I told him last night about the infidelities. He's broken. I've never seen him cry so hard. I feel like a piece of shit and I hate myself. He's not leaving me, but he's also still confused, and extremely devastated. I will get myself the help I need, manage my manic/ depression episodes with the right meds and forever do everything in my power to make it right with him and keep my family together.
Posted by Anonymous on Feb. 20, 2013 at 6:41 AM
Replies (231-240):
Karinmaximom
by Bronze Member on Feb. 21, 2013 at 8:43 AM

you need to have a faith life. go to church

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Feb. 21, 2013 at 8:56 AM

Oh please...Go to a therapist...

Quoting xtina8817:

Quoting Anonymous:

Um, if did you loved your husband, YOU WOULDN'T BE CHEATING...Thats true...


No. It's not. And I wish it were that simple.


noahscott
by Bronze Member on Feb. 21, 2013 at 8:57 AM

i was going to say its new and exciting for you and i think we all know playing mommy generally isn't exciting everyday. that was until i read your comment below. now i get it. its revenge. you might not think it is but it is. i did it when my husband cheated on me, it was horrible because his brother and cousin (girl) wanted to party and stuff but he couldnt' because he was busy being a daddy and husband so they hooked him up with this "fun girl" when he went to visit one time. I kicked him out for 4 months and while he was gone, i went crazy. he saw that someone else would actually want me and wanted to come home, so i let him and treated him like crap for about a month. he cooked and cleaned and stayed home with our son while i went out and blew money and talked to other guys. i made him feel exactly how he made me feel before and i think thats what you're trying to do.

xtina8817
by on Feb. 21, 2013 at 1:55 PM
Quoting Anonymous:


You are a judgemental bitch
Also, I DO go to a therapist. For those exact problems in the past. Guess what? I got help and my life is much better. Fortunately, I can talk to people about it kindly and offer them advice instead of being so bitter.
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Feb. 22, 2013 at 5:39 PM

Thanks for the nick name. I'm not he bitter one. :)

Quoting xtina8817:

Quoting Anonymous:


You are a judgemental bitch
Also, I DO go to a therapist. For those exact problems in the past. Guess what? I got help and my life is much better. Fortunately, I can talk to people about it kindly and offer them advice instead of being so bitter.


Anonymous
by Anonymous on Feb. 26, 2013 at 2:02 PM
1 mom liked this
Well you're a whore. There, I said it....someone needed to. And if you keep it up, your kids will be orphans with nothing but the shame and social stigma that comes with being the orphans of a whore.
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Feb. 26, 2013 at 2:10 PM

I think that's called a slut. You don't care about your husband or your children's feelings while you're out whoring around. Hope karma bites you in the ass hard and you're branded forever as a bad person. Why the fuck do you even go out if you know you can't keep your pants on. Sounds like you need a new hobby before you get an std or pregnant and your secret becomes your family's problem.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Mar. 9, 2013 at 9:46 PM
Bump
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Mar. 10, 2013 at 9:45 AM
Bump
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Mar. 10, 2013 at 9:50 AM
My sister is bipolar and se has never acted that way and she has it bad. Sorry, ou can't use beig bipolar as an excuse to you cheating on your husband. Poor guy!!!
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