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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Do you like your kids?

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
I have an older child (8) and baby (5 mo). I don't like my son. He's mean, bossy, defiant, annoying, and extremely whiney. He's gotten so much worse since his sister was born. He gets tons if attention from me and everybody and has every game and toy available! He tells me he's going to bed at 8:30, I say no bed time is 8. He argues with me and balls his fists. I ask him to brush his teeth he says no. I te him he has to and when he finaly goes to do it, he tries to stare me down as he walks by! I ask him what's wrong he says he doesn't know. He says I don't love him. I'm at my wits end. I'm so angry and annoyed with him that I don't even like him a y more. I love him but this is ridiculous. No judging or bashing please. I need good helpful advice. Could all thus be from a new baby? He's been only child for 8 years...


UPDATE: this morning he came to me very remorseful and hugged me tight and said he's sorry and he loves me very much. And also can he still go to soccer practice? Lol SMH

I also looked into that ODD and it sounds like him. I'm booking an appt. with a child councilor. Thank you all fir your comments and suggestions, and helping me feel not so hopeless.
Posted by Anonymous on Feb. 20, 2013 at 7:44 PM
Replies (31-40):
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Feb. 20, 2013 at 7:58 PM
Yes and I can imagine. We talked to dr and he attributes it to puberty and new baby and says dont worry and maybe counseling will help. That is the next step.


Quoting Anonymous:

He seems really angry, at 8 he's already balling his fists and giving you the stare down. If this continues he's going to end up coming at you, can you imagine the teen years? Have you talked to his doctor about this? Have you ever talked to him about his unacceptable behavior (the stare downs/fists)?


Anonymous
by Anonymous on Feb. 20, 2013 at 7:59 PM

Take some parenting classes, seriously.

Jessy613
by Diamond Member on Feb. 20, 2013 at 7:59 PM

Yes

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Feb. 20, 2013 at 7:59 PM
We also told him its not acceptable and he quit doing it until today. He only challenges me like this when his dad is at work.


Quoting Anonymous:

Yes and I can imagine. We talked to dr and he attributes it to puberty and new baby and says dont worry and maybe counseling will help. That is the next step.




Quoting Anonymous:

He seems really angry, at 8 he's already balling his fists and giving you the stare down. If this continues he's going to end up coming at you, can you imagine the teen years? Have you talked to his doctor about this? Have you ever talked to him about his unacceptable behavior (the stare downs/fists)?



Hanab818
by Ruby Member on Feb. 20, 2013 at 7:59 PM
Sometimes, just not when the pee, poop, or vomit on me.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Feb. 20, 2013 at 8:00 PM
He sounds spoiled.
FooLynRoo
by on Feb. 20, 2013 at 8:01 PM
1 mom liked this

Why do you ask him whats wrong? You know whats wrong, he doesn't want to listen to you.

Shrug it off, he will get over it.

When he tries to argue with you, don't argue back.

Tell him those are the rules, he complies or he gets a punishment.

If he'd like to renegotiate his bedtime he can do so at a later date, not at bed time.

Don't give into his fits, don't meet his "stare down" go about your life as usual. He's doing it because he knows it effects you.

Remain calm, show him how to be mature, by being the mature one.

Don't engage in a battle with an 8 year old.


Anonymous
by Anonymous on Feb. 20, 2013 at 8:03 PM
1 mom liked this
Most of the times I like them & my 8 yr old is the same way as yours. Like & love are 2 diff things. Of course we love our kids, but like.... lol
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Feb. 20, 2013 at 8:03 PM

my oldest is a complete bratt sometimes but she also has ADHD and cant help it most of the time. But yes i like her. You never know what she is gonna say and she is so funny

leavinglasvegas
by Bronze Member on Feb. 20, 2013 at 8:03 PM

I'm not sure if this is going to help, but here it goes. I am strict, bossy and a type A personality. I have a tendency to blow up, yell, etc. But to curb this, I take a moment and think to myself "I am a 40 year old woman. A 3 year old doesn't  tell me what to do." It puts me mentally in control and lets me back up from my personal feelings and lets me deal with the situation in a practical calm way.

If he pushes you don't "push back". Take control - because he feels he has the upper hand. Take it back. Bed at 8. Scream and yell? Don't yell back - just put him to bed. Keeps yelling? Find his currency - a toy, game, tv time, whatever - and TAKE IT FROM HIM. Stares me down? Really? Spend some time sitting at the table staring at the wall for the next however long it takes - and he had better apologize - or consequences.

Keep doing these things - calmly and consistantly. It's hard and he'll get worse before he gets better. Try it for 3 weeks and see if it curbs his behavior.

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