Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

I am in shock..........

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

My mind is spinning. My dh and I recently celebrated our 6th anniversary. I couldn't sleep last night and I saw his cell light up. So I checked it out, and while I was looking I saw a naked pic of some woman. I literally had to hold the phone in both hands bc they were shaking so bad. I felt dizzy,and I'm not a dramatic person. So I dig further, and there are message after message from him to several different people that he'd responded to under "casual encounters" or whatever on Craigslist, and the messages were explicit, and he was talking dirty in a way that I didn't recognize him. I'm no prude, but I was like, "who the hell is ths man??" I felt like I was dreaming. In his messages, he sent a pic of him, his height, weight and penis size (it's really hard to actually be typing this out). Along with telling them he is married. Then, when asked when they could meet, my dh gave them the correct time he'd be off work. So he gave ALL his real info. I have a reason for explaining all this, please bear with me! He had also made a comment to one of the women asking if her husband was going to be a part of it too!!! There were tons of naked pics of women off of Craigslist, so a lot different than masturbating to women on the internet that he'd never actually meet. There were also ads looking for bi couples, and just a bunch of crap I would have NEVER imagined.  So as soon as he woke up, I held up the phone and asked if he wanted to tell me anything. It took him forever, then his excuse was that he just masturbates alot, and it is just a fantasy thing. He said he only talked to them so they would send him a picture!! He said he's never physically cheated on me, and never would. All I could say was, "what else WOULD you tell the wife?" I told him it was all bulls***. I'm still in shock, I have maybe one friend who I can talk to about this. I don't have a clue about what to do. I feel numb, and I am at home with my little ones so I'm also having to hide my emotions. Do you think you would believe him? Please give me your opinion!   My heart is breaking, the kids are down for their nap now, so I've had a chance to read replies. Thank you for the hugs and advice. We have been married just over six years. I'll try to just reply back to the things I remember you all posted.....I NEVER was suspicious of him until today. I am NOT  naturally trusting person, and I have always been able to pick up on subleties(am sensitive to red flags, or so I thought) And someone asked if he had bi tendencies, and I would have said no for sure. I don't know what I know a

nymore. When he left for work this morning, I kept his phone so he couldn't do the obvious deleting. He was logged in to his fb, so I changed his password. I'm trying to figure out how to print everything out. He has called many times, and even had a mutual friend call me! I'm grateful for your posts, and those that offered to chat I will be taking you up on that. I had a good cry, I'm sure there will be more.....I will be back to update

Posted by Anonymous on Feb. 22, 2013 at 12:44 PM
Replies (11-20):
kgsharber
by Gold Member on Feb. 22, 2013 at 1:01 PM
1 mom liked this

 For every rat you see, there's 100 you don't. He is not even ALMOST telling you everything.

Dolphingirl2004
by on Feb. 22, 2013 at 1:04 PM

I would go with your gut feeling.....I wouldnt believe him, if it was fantasy, then he would be able to tell you!!! I am sorry, stay strong!!! xoxoxoxo

kjfamily
by Gold Member on Feb. 22, 2013 at 1:06 PM
Could just be a fantasy . I have done some things I'm not proud of and it was all talk ; I never would actually cheat but I loved the attention. He may just be bored or feeling unappreciated at home.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Feb. 22, 2013 at 1:07 PM

I was actually about to post something similar. I went through my SO's phone and there was one girl he was talking to, she lives in Hawaii and she sent him naked pictures and he was explicit with her too. However, I haven't said anything, she is no where near local, we live in Mo, and he is with me all the time. So...I did nothing. I am not going to break up with him over it, and since I'm not and that isn't really an option I would consider I haven't brought it up, to acoide the inevitable fitght that would ensue...so I have decided to leave it alone, for now.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Feb. 22, 2013 at 1:07 PM
1 mom liked this
This EXACT thing happened to my bestfriend over xmas, she found out because he accidentally posted it to her account instead of his...

He was asking girls for rim jobs and must do this and that, and said he was married so it had to be only once in awhile and discrete etc

When she confronted him he said the exact same thing your husband did... BUT if the men wanted naked pictures there's porn all over the internet!

She moved out literally the next day he admitted it had been going on for the whole 6 years they had been married she has a 2 and 5 yr old. There getting a divorce.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
mom2boys664
by Silver Member on Feb. 22, 2013 at 1:07 PM
1 mom liked this

I am so sorry, I can't imagine.  I would not beleive him, once someone lies, you really can't trust anything they are saying.  You need to get the real answers - maybe someone can watch the kids so you can go somewhere with him and talk it all out.  I would need to really get a handle on what I am dealing with first, and really, if he wanted to continue and hide it, he could.  For me the #1 biggest issue is lieing about it - if you have some weird crap you want to do, tell me and I will decide if I can live with that, but don't lie to me. It sounds more like a sexual thing, not really an emotional thing, and he may need therepy to deal with whatever is going on.  Watching porn and masturbating is one thing, contacting real people is another.

ColtsFan1912
by FriendoftheFoot on Feb. 22, 2013 at 1:09 PM

I"m really sorry. :( If you need to talk PM.  . .I've been in a slightly similar situation. 

Beenhereforever
by Gold Member on Feb. 22, 2013 at 1:09 PM
You need to go to the detective wives club right away. I mean it. Seriously.

Or pm me. Ill help you get to the bottom of this.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Feb. 22, 2013 at 1:11 PM
Soooooo your going to let him continue to cheat on you? Ignorance is truly bliss I suppose.

Quoting Anonymous:

I was actually about to post something similar. I went through my SO's phone and there was one girl he was talking to, she lives in Hawaii and she sent him naked pictures and he was explicit with her too. However, I haven't said anything, she is no where near local, we live in Mo, and he is with me all the time. So...I did nothing. I am not going to break up with him over it, and since I'm not and that isn't really an option I would consider I haven't brought it up, to acoide the inevitable fitght that would ensue...so I have decided to leave it alone, for now.

Beenhereforever
by Gold Member on Feb. 22, 2013 at 1:12 PM
I have been in this situation. I know how to set him up and see if he will meet " me" .. If he shows up, you know what he was going to do..
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)