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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

I am in shock..........

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

My mind is spinning. My dh and I recently celebrated our 6th anniversary. I couldn't sleep last night and I saw his cell light up. So I checked it out, and while I was looking I saw a naked pic of some woman. I literally had to hold the phone in both hands bc they were shaking so bad. I felt dizzy,and I'm not a dramatic person. So I dig further, and there are message after message from him to several different people that he'd responded to under "casual encounters" or whatever on Craigslist, and the messages were explicit, and he was talking dirty in a way that I didn't recognize him. I'm no prude, but I was like, "who the hell is ths man??" I felt like I was dreaming. In his messages, he sent a pic of him, his height, weight and penis size (it's really hard to actually be typing this out). Along with telling them he is married. Then, when asked when they could meet, my dh gave them the correct time he'd be off work. So he gave ALL his real info. I have a reason for explaining all this, please bear with me! He had also made a comment to one of the women asking if her husband was going to be a part of it too!!! There were tons of naked pics of women off of Craigslist, so a lot different than masturbating to women on the internet that he'd never actually meet. There were also ads looking for bi couples, and just a bunch of crap I would have NEVER imagined.  So as soon as he woke up, I held up the phone and asked if he wanted to tell me anything. It took him forever, then his excuse was that he just masturbates alot, and it is just a fantasy thing. He said he only talked to them so they would send him a picture!! He said he's never physically cheated on me, and never would. All I could say was, "what else WOULD you tell the wife?" I told him it was all bulls***. I'm still in shock, I have maybe one friend who I can talk to about this. I don't have a clue about what to do. I feel numb, and I am at home with my little ones so I'm also having to hide my emotions. Do you think you would believe him? Please give me your opinion!   My heart is breaking, the kids are down for their nap now, so I've had a chance to read replies. Thank you for the hugs and advice. We have been married just over six years. I'll try to just reply back to the things I remember you all posted.....I NEVER was suspicious of him until today. I am NOT  naturally trusting person, and I have always been able to pick up on subleties(am sensitive to red flags, or so I thought) And someone asked if he had bi tendencies, and I would have said no for sure. I don't know what I know a

nymore. When he left for work this morning, I kept his phone so he couldn't do the obvious deleting. He was logged in to his fb, so I changed his password. I'm trying to figure out how to print everything out. He has called many times, and even had a mutual friend call me! I'm grateful for your posts, and those that offered to chat I will be taking you up on that. I had a good cry, I'm sure there will be more.....I will be back to update

Posted by Anonymous on Feb. 22, 2013 at 12:44 PM
Replies (21-30):
MamaMoopsie
by on Feb. 22, 2013 at 1:14 PM

For me, that is cheating. Having sexual conversations like that with someone OTHER than your spouse is cheating. My DH feels the same way. Sure, we'll watch porn together and even sometimes alone, but it's not the same thing as searching out people and having these discussions and possibly meeting them.

I wouldn't be able to trust my DH again after that. Why can't he get satisfaction from you?

I'm so sorry you're going through this!

Luna091306
by on Feb. 22, 2013 at 1:14 PM

 Gone, gone, gone. What a bullshit excuse, "I would never physically cheat." Ugh! What he did was just as wrong.

Luna091306
by on Feb. 22, 2013 at 1:16 PM

 Exactly. My dh can watch porn all he wants but the minute he reaches out and talks to one of the women he watches he's crossing a line. It make it personal.

Quoting MamaMoopsie:

For me, that is cheating. Having sexual conversations like that with someone OTHER than your spouse is cheating. My DH feels the same way. Sure, we'll watch porn together and even sometimes alone, but it's not the same thing as searching out people and having these discussions and possibly meeting them.

I wouldn't be able to trust my DH again after that. Why can't he get satisfaction from you?

I'm so sorry you're going through this!

 

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NaturalMama1026
by on Feb. 22, 2013 at 1:21 PM
So what if you believe him. You are barely finding putt these types of things after 6 years of marriage. Maturity and commitment help people curb inclinations that they might otherwise indulge in if they were single. NOT OKAY WHEN MARRIED. Honesty and trust are the main foundation in a relationship. Sexual types of things like this are so hard because it really can change a person like drugs. So sorry you are going through this.
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Beenhereforever
by Gold Member on Feb. 22, 2013 at 3:01 PM
1 mom liked this
I still think you need to go to detective wives club.
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lustfull
by Bronze Member on Feb. 22, 2013 at 4:34 PM

 wow

Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Feb. 23, 2013 at 2:27 PM
Update?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Feb. 23, 2013 at 6:48 PM

He's not cheating on me...is he with her? No... has he had sex with her? No...he is home with me every night and that's all that really matters, we had a talk about this and everything worked out and he is no longer talking to her. But if I hadn't brought it up, I would've just left it alone, because honestly...there was nothing going on.

Quoting Anonymous:

Soooooo your going to let him continue to cheat on you? Ignorance is truly bliss I suppose.

Quoting Anonymous:

I was actually about to post something similar. I went through my SO's phone and there was one girl he was talking to, she lives in Hawaii and she sent him naked pictures and he was explicit with her too. However, I haven't said anything, she is no where near local, we live in Mo, and he is with me all the time. So...I did nothing. I am not going to break up with him over it, and since I'm not and that isn't really an option I would consider I haven't brought it up, to acoide the inevitable fitght that would ensue...so I have decided to leave it alone, for now.

 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 6 on Feb. 23, 2013 at 7:02 PM
Do yourself and get checked blood and Pap smear to be on the safe side.....
Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Feb. 23, 2013 at 10:17 PM
Naked pictures and being explicit means something IS going on.

Quoting Anonymous:

He's not cheating on me...is he with her? No... has he had sex with her? No...he is home with me every night and that's all that really matters, we had a talk about this and everything worked out and he is no longer talking to her. But if I hadn't brought it up, I would've just left it alone, because honestly...there was nothing going on.


Quoting Anonymous:

Soooooo your going to let him continue to cheat on you? Ignorance is truly bliss I suppose.


Quoting Anonymous:


I was actually about to post something similar. I went through my SO's phone and there was one girl he was talking to, she lives in Hawaii and she sent him naked pictures and he was explicit with her too. However, I haven't said anything, she is no where near local, we live in Mo, and he is with me all the time. So...I did nothing. I am not going to break up with him over it, and since I'm not and that isn't really an option I would consider I haven't brought it up, to acoide the inevitable fitght that would ensue...so I have decided to leave it alone, for now.


 

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