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How do I tell a friend they're not going to be in my wedding?

Posted by on Feb. 23, 2013 at 4:00 AM
  • 6 Replies

So, I'm getting married in September. I'm having 3 bridesmaids and my fiance is only having 2 grooms men. We wanted it that way. I think it's cute when you have an odd number. The second grooms men will walk down the aisle with 2 bridesmaids. Well my problem is that one of my bridesmaids is assuming that her boyfriend is going to be a grooms men....he's not. It's not even a possibility. He's assuming he's going to be in the wedding too. I don't know how to tell them he's not going to be in it without either of them getting mad or upset.

Any suggestions?

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by on Feb. 23, 2013 at 4:00 AM
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Replies (1-6):
opal10161973
by on Feb. 23, 2013 at 4:03 AM

Don't.  Asking men to be the groomsmen is the groom's responsibility.  Have him explain it to him. 

lammertc
by Bronze Member on Feb. 23, 2013 at 4:05 AM

Ok, I should have specified. This post is for both of us. We've been talking about it and he has no idea what to say either.

Quoting opal10161973:

Don't.  Asking men to be the groomsmen is the groom's responsibility.  Have him explain it to him. 


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DieselsMom
by Gold Member on Feb. 23, 2013 at 4:07 AM

Odd that you want it to be different...but how hard is it to just explain that to her?

opal10161973
by on Feb. 23, 2013 at 4:09 AM

IDK why they would assume that anyway.  I would never assume that I was invited to be a bridesmaid unless I was asked by the bride.  Are they young or just ignorant on how this is done?

Quoting lammertc:

Ok, I should have specified. This post is for both of us. We've been talking about it and he has no idea what to say either.

Quoting opal10161973:

Don't.  Asking men to be the groomsmen is the groom's responsibility.  Have him explain it to him. 



horseap
by Gold Member on Feb. 23, 2013 at 4:11 AM

 

Quoting opal10161973:

Don't.  Asking men to be the groomsmen is the groom's responsibility.  Have him explain it to him. 

 This.  Or just write her a note thanking HER for being in the wedding party and have her bring it up?  IDK

DHs uncle is getting married and I told his fiance that I would help if she needed(making center pieces, flower arrangements, favors and such)  I told DH that she said the rehearsal dinner was the night before the wedding and at the restaurant next door.  Hes like "Thats nice but were not going..."  uhhh... "We werent invited"  First off, Im helping set up the hall and I said if her mom were to make the food I would help her prep/cook/set everything up for the wedding so she and her girls and DHs cousins(his uncles kids) could enjoy the wedding! Were GOING to the wedding.  Invites havent even been ordered yet dummy! So NO, youre right.  We havent been invited.



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KaylasMama11
by on Feb. 23, 2013 at 4:11 AM

aww this sounds difficult. but this is your wedding one of your happiest days of your lives! you can say simply and nicely that you and your Df just wanted the two groomsman because you like the idea the odd number exactly what you told us. i mean its your wedding not hers. its kind of rude that she assumed he would be your df grooms man but its your big day and if shes really your friend she will really understand i know i would.

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