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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Would this upset you? (daycare related)

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
DS is 3.5. He goes to preschool full time, and generally likes it, except during the "aftercare" program (the last 2 hours or so). When a certain teacher is there (which is a lot lately), he gets really grumpy during the evening at home. BUT, we can never get him to talk about after care (he will talk sometimes about fun things he did during morning class).

But tonight, this was our exchange:

DS: Mommy I want to tell you a story. One day at school I went to go to the potty, and I came out and (teacher) and everyone else had left me all alone.

Me: How did that make you feel?

DS: It scared me. (*note he has never told me before that anything has scared him*)

Me: Thanks for telling me that story. I will call (director) tomorrow and make sure that doesn't happen anymore, okay?

DS: Okay mommy.

Would you be upset? I can't decide if the incident was a huge deal, or if I am just looking for more reasons to be worried about this teacher. :(
She usually doesn't do major things wrong, we just find her to be a bit out of touch with kids, and, again, DS is always crabby after being with her.

Btw, yesterday was the first day ever that he went to school with "big boy underwear" on instead of pullups. He is very new to potty training.
Posted by Anonymous on Feb. 26, 2013 at 11:57 PM
Replies (21-30):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 8 on Feb. 27, 2013 at 12:13 AM

I would be talking to someone and finding WTF is going on.

LeetjieJ
by Silver Member on Feb. 27, 2013 at 12:14 AM
I fully agree with this. When I did aftercare Ialways knew where all the kids were; particularly the littlies (close to me!)
Also, always being disgruntled after a certain teacher is a red flag.


Quoting Anonymous:

Absolutely I'd be fucking pissed. Besides having two of my own kids, I've worked child care forever and always knew to take a head count before leaving an area. Once, I because a certified child care worker as an adult, I checked even more. Every 10-15 we kept s check on our sheet and I would randomly count the kids as they got picked up one by one even if it was before the check point time and if a child was in the bathroom, I knew it. Smh.
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HuggaBug1991
by on Feb. 27, 2013 at 12:18 AM

 yes it would upset me!

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Feb. 27, 2013 at 12:18 AM
This is helpful--thanks


Quoting Anonymous:

We are taught when working for a program, a child that young is never to be out of our eyesight. If we stand outside the door because a parent insists in privacy, we leave a part of our body (like our foot or hand) by the door to reassure the child of our presence. I would still be upset if she had made my child feel completely alone at just 3.5. I was the head classroom director for 3 hour pre-k after school program of 16 kids.



Quoting Anonymous:

It's small; aftercare is usually only a handful of kids. My guess is that she was outside the door somewhere, but that he didn't know it. She should have gone in with him, especially bc he is just learning. Also, it sounds like it was the grownup bathroom, not a classroom one :(












Quoting Anonymous:

Absolutely I'd be fucking pissed. Besides having two of my own kids, I've worked child care forever and always knew to take a head count before leaving an area. Once, I because a certified child care worker as an adult, I checked even more. Every 10-15 we kept s check on our sheet and I would randomly count the kids as they got picked up one by one even if it was before the check point time and if a child was in the bathroom, I knew it. Smh.


Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Feb. 27, 2013 at 12:21 AM
I agree.

Honestly? I would like this teacher to not be here anymore.


Quoting Anonymous:

Obviously something is not right. Your ds is telling you this with his behavior and it sounds like your mommy intuition is telling you as well. I would first try to have him removed from her care whether he is put with another worker or you move him altogether. Just remember he is 3 what can a 3 year old do about his daycare? What can he do? All he has is his words and his behavior and clearly she scares him so it is less likely he will talk about it.

momma4vr
by Gold Member on Feb. 27, 2013 at 12:22 AM

i had my dd at a different daycare and she loved the morning teachers... the afternoon ones (unless it was her auntie who worked there until recently) she hated... she would have more tantrums at home.... they wouldnt feed her dinner if she was there at 6pm like all the other kids, and what did it for me is she was bit 2 times in 2 days back to back and there was only 1 teacher in the room and it was during potty time (which means there has to be 2 teachers). the daycare was like oh well kids bite.... and she might have provoked them... i watched the tape.. first time my dd was just sitting there when the kid bit her arm! the second was her face. both times my dd did nothing... i pulled her out of there and have her in a new daycare (my ex hates bc its a christian daycare and they have "church" every wed. but idc) and she loves it... tantrums still happen but shes 2 and we just found out shes autistic.... but she loves the teachers...so much that she kissed one of them goodbye the other day on the cheek lol... and they all love her. i couldnt be happier getting her out of the other daycare and into this one. trust ur mommy gut

Quoting Anonymous:

I sent the director an email tonight, and told her I want to discuss it further tomorrow.

I do know that during the days that this teacher isn't there, he is totally fine in the evenings.


Quoting crescentstar2:

my youngest is in preschool, he loves the teacher but the lady that takes care of the kids in the daycare part he didn't like. I thought she was just very stern one day I saw something I didn't like and I talked to the owner and sense then the other lady has made a 180. I'd talk to them as maybe they don't see it 



Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Feb. 27, 2013 at 12:25 AM
It may be time to move him. Too bad, bc I love his morning class.

The other issue is that I am about to have a baby, and he will be ensured a slot in this school (wait lists for babies in this city are months long)


Quoting momma4vr:

i had my dd at a different daycare and she loved the morning teachers... the afternoon ones (unless it was her auntie who worked there until recently) she hated... she would have more tantrums at home.... they wouldnt feed her dinner if she was there at 6pm like all the other kids, and what did it for me is she was bit 2 times in 2 days back to back and there was only 1 teacher in the room and it was during potty time (which means there has to be 2 teachers). the daycare was like oh well kids bite.... and she might have provoked them... i watched the tape.. first time my dd was just sitting there when the kid bit her arm! the second was her face. both times my dd did nothing... i pulled her out of there and have her in a new daycare (my ex hates bc its a christian daycare and they have "church" every wed. but idc) and she loves it... tantrums still happen but shes 2 and we just found out shes autistic.... but she loves the teachers...so much that she kissed one of them goodbye the other day on the cheek lol... and they all love her. i couldnt be happier getting her out of the other daycare and into this one. trust ur mommy gut

Quoting Anonymous:

I sent the director an email tonight, and told her I want to discuss it further tomorrow.



I do know that during the days that this teacher isn't there, he is totally fine in the evenings.





Quoting crescentstar2:

my youngest is in preschool, he loves the teacher but the lady that takes care of the kids in the daycare part he didn't like. I thought she was just very stern one day I saw something I didn't like and I talked to the owner and sense then the other lady has made a 180. I'd talk to them as maybe they don't see it 





momma4vr
by Gold Member on Feb. 27, 2013 at 12:27 AM

well... the other thing u can think of is.. if ur onna be on materinity leave for a while.. get him and the baby on a waitlist for a new daycare and let him go pt to his daycare hes at now and pick him up before the pm switch and then hopefully ur in a daycare for both when u go back to work? i hated pulling her from the am teachers at her old place too but it was so worth it in the end


Quoting Anonymous:

It may be time to move him. Too bad, bc I love his morning class.

The other issue is that I am about to have a baby, and he will be ensured a slot in this school (wait lists for babies in this city are months long)


Quoting momma4vr:

i had my dd at a different daycare and she loved the morning teachers... the afternoon ones (unless it was her auntie who worked there until recently) she hated... she would have more tantrums at home.... they wouldnt feed her dinner if she was there at 6pm like all the other kids, and what did it for me is she was bit 2 times in 2 days back to back and there was only 1 teacher in the room and it was during potty time (which means there has to be 2 teachers). the daycare was like oh well kids bite.... and she might have provoked them... i watched the tape.. first time my dd was just sitting there when the kid bit her arm! the second was her face. both times my dd did nothing... i pulled her out of there and have her in a new daycare (my ex hates bc its a christian daycare and they have "church" every wed. but idc) and she loves it... tantrums still happen but shes 2 and we just found out shes autistic.... but she loves the teachers...so much that she kissed one of them goodbye the other day on the cheek lol... and they all love her. i couldnt be happier getting her out of the other daycare and into this one. trust ur mommy gut

Quoting Anonymous:

I sent the director an email tonight, and told her I want to discuss it further tomorrow.



I do know that during the days that this teacher isn't there, he is totally fine in the evenings.





Quoting crescentstar2:

my youngest is in preschool, he loves the teacher but the lady that takes care of the kids in the daycare part he didn't like. I thought she was just very stern one day I saw something I didn't like and I talked to the owner and sense then the other lady has made a 180. I'd talk to them as maybe they don't see it 






Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Feb. 27, 2013 at 12:30 AM
This is good advice, thanks


Quoting momma4vr:

well... the other thing u can think of is.. if ur onna be on materinity leave for a while.. get him and the baby on a waitlist for a new daycare and let him go pt to his daycare hes at now and pick him up before the pm switch and then hopefully ur in a daycare for both when u go back to work? i hated pulling her from the am teachers at her old place too but it was so worth it in the end


Quoting Anonymous:

It may be time to move him. Too bad, bc I love his morning class.



The other issue is that I am about to have a baby, and he will be ensured a slot in this school (wait lists for babies in this city are months long)





Quoting momma4vr:

i had my dd at a different daycare and she loved the morning teachers... the afternoon ones (unless it was her auntie who worked there until recently) she hated... she would have more tantrums at home.... they wouldnt feed her dinner if she was there at 6pm like all the other kids, and what did it for me is she was bit 2 times in 2 days back to back and there was only 1 teacher in the room and it was during potty time (which means there has to be 2 teachers). the daycare was like oh well kids bite.... and she might have provoked them... i watched the tape.. first time my dd was just sitting there when the kid bit her arm! the second was her face. both times my dd did nothing... i pulled her out of there and have her in a new daycare (my ex hates bc its a christian daycare and they have "church" every wed. but idc) and she loves it... tantrums still happen but shes 2 and we just found out shes autistic.... but she loves the teachers...so much that she kissed one of them goodbye the other day on the cheek lol... and they all love her. i couldnt be happier getting her out of the other daycare and into this one. trust ur mommy gut

Quoting Anonymous:

I sent the director an email tonight, and told her I want to discuss it further tomorrow.





I do know that during the days that this teacher isn't there, he is totally fine in the evenings.








Quoting crescentstar2:

my youngest is in preschool, he loves the teacher but the lady that takes care of the kids in the daycare part he didn't like. I thought she was just very stern one day I saw something I didn't like and I talked to the owner and sense then the other lady has made a 180. I'd talk to them as maybe they don't see it 









Mrs.Winchester
by on Feb. 27, 2013 at 12:30 AM

I feel torn both ways because I have had the privilage of assisting in a really great preschool so when I imagine a child saying that from MY preschool I know it would be absurd.  However,  I know if MY dd were to come home and tell me that as a mother I would be really bothered.

I would definitely talk about it to the teacher's but don't go in there looking for a fight without hearing their story.

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