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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

I'm worried.. Help!

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 20 Replies

 Okay, so in April my ex and I have court to establish custody/child support. We haven't spoken in awhile, and when we do, we fight.. We can never discuss important things. (Trust me. I've tried. He always hangs up on me. And he has my # blocked, so he can only call me when he wants to talk!) Therefore, I don't really know his intentions. The child support specialists told me that we could go to mediation if he agreed with what I wanted and was put in the papers he was served with. I went with supervised visitations (for multipul reasons) and I KNOW he will not agree to that, so we will most likely have to go before a judge.

 Now, he has a job; at a restaurant. I was let go from my job in November due to cut backs and haven't been able to fund another one. Thankfully, with the money I have saved and tax returns, my DS and I are living comfortably while I look for a new job. But I'm afraid this will be something that could be used against me in the custody hearing. Also, he got a bunch of money from his dad passing away, so he will be able to afford a real good lawyer. I can't. That scares me also. 

 Everyone keeps telling me that I have nothing to worry about. That his criminal record and actions towards our DS and I, that there will be no way he will get custody. But I guess I just fear the worst. I have been the ONLY parent in our DSs life since the start. His father has been in and out. I don't want them to take my baby away from me. ;(

DS loves his Dad and I know that my ex loves DS, but he is in no way, shape or form, able to realistically care for a child on his own. He wouldn't know what to do. I don't want to keep DS away from him.. But I don't trust him to be alone with DS either.

Now before you guys bash that I shouldn't of spread my legs to some loser.. He has changed in the past 6 months. He is not the person, I fell in love with. And honestly if you want to talk crap go ahead, I don't care. I just needed to vent and no matter what.. I know there is always shit talkers.

Posted by Anonymous on Mar. 3, 2013 at 1:27 AM
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Replies (1-10):
pce68
by Patti on Mar. 3, 2013 at 1:30 AM

How old is your child?

And have you checked with the Bar Association in your state? they could give you a list of lawyers that do pro bono work that might be able to help you out.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Mar. 3, 2013 at 1:31 AM

Talk to Legal Aid in your area.  Good luck.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 3, 2013 at 1:31 AM

2. And yes, I have thought of that. I guess I am just worried they won't work as hard since they aren't getting the big bucks. Idk. Stupid.

Quoting pce68:

How old is your child?

And have you checked with the Bar Association in your state? they could give you a list of lawyers that do pro bono work that might be able to help you out.



Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 3, 2013 at 1:34 AM

I would have been okay with no child support. My state actually filed all this on him. Not me. Ex walked out on DS and I. And doesn't try to contact DS just to say hello or ask to see him. And when I do talk to him, and ask when he's going to come visit, he always says he broke. But I just seen on Facebook that he got 2 new tattoos and drove 45 minutes away to get them. :/

pce68
by Patti on Mar. 3, 2013 at 1:35 AM

I ask again how old your child is bc if he is old enough they will take his opinions into consideration. They don't always follow what the child wishes but it does influence the judge if your child says he wants to be with you.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 3, 2013 at 1:36 AM


He's only 2.

Quoting pce68:

I ask again how old your child is bc if he is old enough they will take his opinions into consideration. They don't always follow what the child wishes but it does influence the judge if your child says he wants to be with you.



Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Mar. 3, 2013 at 1:37 AM
They wont grant him custody on financial stability alone. He'll need to prove he can physically, mentally and emotionally provide your son a stable life. Good luck.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 3, 2013 at 1:39 AM


I know. Like I said.. I guess I just worry to much. It's just my baby and the thought of him bein away from me, kills me. 

Quoting Anonymous:

They wont grant him custody on financial stability alone. He'll need to prove he can physically, mentally and emotionally provide your son a stable life. Good luck.



Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Mar. 3, 2013 at 1:57 AM

 From what I hear, if the father has a criminal record and the mother does not. The mother isn't a druggie and isn't emotionally disturbed they generally go with the mother.  Sometimes the father will get the child if it's vice versa. Mother has a record, is a druggie, and/or has a history of mental problems then it will sometimes go to the father. I hope I helped a little.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Mar. 3, 2013 at 1:59 AM

 


Quoting Anonymous:

I would have been okay with no child support. My state actually filed all this on him. Not me. Ex walked out on DS and I. And doesn't try to contact DS just to say hello or ask to see him. And when I do talk to him, and ask when he's going to come visit, he always says he broke. But I just seen on Facebook that he got 2 new tattoos and drove 45 minutes away to get them. :/


 Print screen of those facebook posts and make sure you get the date and time they were posted.

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