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dating, how young is too young?

Posted by Anonymous
  • 146 Replies
I took my son to a roller skating party last night. Once a month his school has great skate night. Anyway, as we were getting our skates on I overheard a group of 4th and 5th grade girls talking. One girl asked the other if she was going out with so and so. She said yes. One girl commented how she didn't think he was very cute. Just then the guy of topic came up behind the girl who said she was dating him and put his arm around her. The girls all giggled and the two skated of holding hands. One girl got out her cell phone and was texting a friend. My son is friends with one of the girls little sister so I know they were 4th and 5th graders. Well as the night went on I noticed almost every kids 8 years old and up had cell phones and lots of girls 9 and up were talking about boys. Call me old fashioned but an 8 year old with a cell phone is like wth. 10 year old girls dating just blows me away. What cracks me up though is the same girls who said they had boyfriends and cellphones acting all grown up were all sucking on oversized light up binkies. My oldest is 7 years old and Dh and I have already agreed that he will not get a cell phone until he reaches high school and won't be dating until then either. Is 3rd, 4th and 5th to young to date? Would you allow your child of that age to date?
Posted by Anonymous on Mar. 6, 2013 at 8:13 AM
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by Platinum Member on Mar. 6, 2013 at 8:22 AM
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In my house, You're old enough to date when you can buy your own underwear & tampons, without allowance.
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by on Mar. 6, 2013 at 8:25 AM
4th-5th grade is a but young.
I know I had " boyfriends" then but it was puppy love.
I met DH at 15 so I think that's a good place to start.
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by Emerald Member on Mar. 6, 2013 at 8:30 AM
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Yes My sons dated in 5th grade. Why ? because they asked. Why did I let them because I saw other kids sneaking around doing it. We sat our boys down and told them the rules of dating.

1) call her parents and ask if you can date her (thought for sure that would end it right there)

2) make a plan of what day, where you want to go and then call her and ask her out.

3) I or dh & I chaperoned these dates.

4) we pick up the girl. Sons go to door.Go in meet parents, reiterrate the plans. ASK what time date needs to be home.

5) Treat her like a lady just like dad has shown and taught you.

6) buy her movie ticket, drink, snack & sit 1 row in front of mom

7) after date walk her to the door, thank her parents for allowing you to date her.

We did this until HS. It worked for us. Parents of the girls loved how my sons treated and respected them and their DDs.

Surround yourself with people that add to your life not subtract from it.

by Bronze Member on Mar. 6, 2013 at 8:32 AM
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The "going out with" stuff that 5th graders are talking about is rarely actual dating. Even my first "boyfriend" at 13 was hardly dating - we were neighbors who played with our TMNT action figures all the time and went out to the movies once.

by Gold Member on Mar. 6, 2013 at 8:34 AM
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While your in my house and have no job my boys will not be dating. School is more important than having a "girlfriend ".
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by on Mar. 6, 2013 at 8:34 AM

Not too young IMHO. They aren't really "dating" because they can't go anywhere on their own. My kids will probably have cell phones when they start middle school so that we can all stay in touch.

This was common when I was in 4th and 5th grade.

by Beth on Mar. 6, 2013 at 8:36 AM
My ds is 11 he's in the 5th grade it drives me crazy all his friends have girlfriends and all the girls are boy crazy.
Ds isn't into girls yet thank goodness he's only interested in sports right now.
I find notes from girls in his backpack and it's nuts how these young girls act.
One girl in 4th grade started calling my son "gay boy" because she kept bugging him and he finally had enough and told her no he isn't into her!
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by Challenger 💗 on Mar. 6, 2013 at 8:37 AM
My daughter can date when she's sixteen. I don't want to be to strict though. I want her to come to me for everything even if she's young. But 5th grade? No way in hell lol.
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by Emerald Member on Mar. 6, 2013 at 8:40 AM
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silliness.  It is way too young to date, how ridiculous.  Dating before age 16 is completely unnecessary.


I really don't understand why people would condone this. 

by Anonymous 2 on Mar. 6, 2013 at 8:41 AM
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Those pacifiers are weird, I thought that whole trend died years ago...

As far as boyfriends/girlfriends, yeah they do that. My son is in 5th and had his first GF this year, his BFF had his last year. But BF/GF isn't what you think. It's holding hands and passing notes, just with a title. That's all.

High school is a real stretch but I wish you the best of luck. Just keep in mind that being that strict may cause your kid to rebel like crazy and do it anyway (and hide it from you).

My son also has a cell phone. But he's very restricted on its usage, etc.

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