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I can't do it without a nanny

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

I have a very active 19 m old and I'm a single working mom.i am used to taking him to daycare from 7.45 to 3.30, mond to frid and a nanny comes home on tue and Thursday from 4 to 8 and sund from 2 to 6 m.

Last sund she told me that she could not come on tues anymore and I thought I was able to hande it all without her help.

i can't .

i m sick this week so it may not be the best time to evaluate this but I think I need help 3 times a week if I want a clean home, homemade meals, quality time, time at home to work and not get too stressed.

how do women do it without help?

EDIT

since people don't read responses, I am going to clarify certain things:

1) I should have used the word "maid" or helper instead of nanny. She cleans, does laundry, folds clothes, crosses the street to pick up a few groceries, organizes toys, recharges batteries, change batteries and yes, she would not  ignore my child if he wants to play but she is always around while I am home. she may change a diaper here and there or get sippy cups ready or clean high chair or help feeding him fruit after we ate dinner but she is not a "nanny" working alone

2) I took my son's first 14 months off to be with him.

3) I don't need to hear about moms that are going to school as well as unlike them, I planned on the baby after I had earned my MA and I was almost doone with my PhD

4)I don't judge SAHMs, you don't judge working moms

5) I leave the office to be home with my son but I still have to do work from home.

6) like most if you, I did have to suck it up and be a mom (whatever it means for everyone).for me, it means that I dont get my hair done twice a week, I dont get manicures and pedicures, I dont get a massage, I dont work out as much as I jused to, I dont travel as much as i used to, i dont have a different $100 bottle of perfume every month, I dont buy expensive make up, I don't hang out wiuth the same friends and etc etc...it is all about my son and i am happy but go and judge your own self

Posted by Anonymous on Mar. 6, 2013 at 10:44 PM
Replies (231-240):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 39 on Mar. 8, 2013 at 10:18 AM
So you had four kids in five years with the same man and are now single?
Beds was an auto-correct. I got what you said.


Quoting Anonymous:

Special beds? I didn't say special beds.



They have the same dad. Why does that matter?



Quoting Anonymous:

You're a single mom to 4 children with special beds, under the age of 5? Wow! No words... Just a question. How many fathers?






Quoting Anonymous:

I am a single mom to 4 kids 5 and under. They go to my sisters from 7:30 to 4:30, but I make ALL of their meals for them at my home and she just feeds it to them. They also all have special needs. It can be done. It takes strength. You can do it.


sarahbsquare
by Silver Member on Mar. 8, 2013 at 10:21 AM

you have to do what you have to do and no other mom knows what's best for your family besides you as long as you are with your baby and he doesn't see your nanny as his mom that would be awkward for me.

kgsharber
by Gold Member on Mar. 8, 2013 at 10:23 AM
1 mom liked this

 Oh Lord. If you are an educated woman who planned this pregnancy, the women in this forum will never understand you.

That's all I will say.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 42 on Mar. 8, 2013 at 10:39 AM

Wow.. I'm lucky to get my hair done once every 4 months if I'm lucky. I have never had my nails done much less my toe nails. 20$ is the most ill ever spend on perfume, my make up comes from Walmart.. And I haven't hung out with friends since high school.. 

jenval
by Bronze Member on Mar. 8, 2013 at 10:47 AM

Kudo's to you for being a single,   hard working mother. It must me difficult to raise a child by yourself, work fulll time  and get your PH.D without much help. You seem like a determined, loving mother and I bet you'll get it figured out.

you rock







ashley9603
by RunningMomma on Mar. 8, 2013 at 10:48 AM

I understand that you are used to the help and going from having it to not having it is tough.I cant really help you lol,I have been taking care of all three of mine on my own while dh works.I still go out do the shopping,pay bills,doctor appts.You just have to be able to multi task and plan well.

kgsharber
by Gold Member on Mar. 8, 2013 at 11:05 AM

 That is actually pitiful. :0(

Quoting Anonymous:

Wow.. I'm lucky to get my hair done once every 4 months if I'm lucky. I have never had my nails done much less my toe nails. 20$ is the most ill ever spend on perfume, my make up comes from Walmart.. And I haven't hung out with friends since high school.. 

 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 42 on Mar. 8, 2013 at 11:53 AM


Maybe but I had my daughter young so it's just sacrifices I make. She is 5 & I have a 9 month old! 

Quoting kgsharber:

 That is actually pitiful. :0(

Quoting Anonymous:

Wow.. I'm lucky to get my hair done once every 4 months if I'm lucky. I have never had my nails done much less my toe nails. 20$ is the most ill ever spend on perfume, my make up comes from Walmart.. And I haven't hung out with friends since high school.. 

 



Anonymous
by Anonymous 43 on Mar. 8, 2013 at 1:04 PM

And you're a mother why?

I'm not trying to bash you but this is ridiculous! I'm a single mom of a 3 1/2 year old boy, have custody of my 13 year old sister, work full time and run a business on the side. I still make breakfast every morning, dinner every night, pack lunches everyday and manage to keep my house clean, organized and spend time with both kids. Dealing with a teenager on her period complaining about everything under the sun and then having a tantrum throwing toddler in the background is not that hard, at least for me. Learn to multi-task! I also still manage to fit in some "me" time nearly every night after they're in bed and get to go out one Saturday night per month (not to a bar). I'm not exhausted or overwhelmed. I manage just fine. I enjoy being busy and the "payment" I receive at the end of every day for doing it all is amazing. Hugs, kisses and thank you's from kids are well worth it.

What's your problem that you can't do it with ONE while working at home? Why did you have a kid when you can't do it on your own without a nanny? I'm sorry, I just don't understand...

jcpeters0320
by Bronze Member on Mar. 8, 2013 at 1:17 PM
Not too poor to have a child....too poor to do anything special for myself. There's a difference you stupid bitch.


Quoting Anonymous:

Why don't you cry a river and then float away? If you're too poor to have children then you shouldn't have had them.




Quoting jcpeters0320:

Lol you don't get your hair done twice a week or any of that other vain shit? Try having to go a week without your medication because you had to make a choice between your meds and diapers. No manicure and pedicures? My shoes are tore the hell up, full of holes, because every time I have the spare money to get new shoes I've had to get shoes for my son instead since he's growing like a weed. And you have a PhD? Congrats but my God where did you get it? You can't spell or use proper grammar. And no more massages? Wtf? Boo hoo!


I haven't gotten a Christmas gift in 3 years because I told my family to only get for my son and the other kids....I haven't gotten an anniversary gift in the five years I've been married because its right after my sons birthday and we have absolutely no spare money after his birthday. I bet you have no idea what struggling really is. Struggling is having no food and only 10 bucks to last a week.


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