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Update on CPS being here yesterday

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 14 Replies
I'm sorry I keep making new posts! I'm sure its hard to keep up but there are 200+ replies to every post I make and I'm mobile so its very hard to keep up!

First to clarify. I did let the worker into my home because I have nothing to hide. I know that depending on the case this will either help or hinder me! I tried to answer her questions with as little info as possible except to say that we are definitely in no way neglectful, we even took him for weekly weight checks for the first 2 months due to his acid reflux to.make sure he was gaining weight and that we had just seen an eye specialist the day before she came to check out his blocked tear ducts. She was very nice (probably too nice and that made me nervous!). She did record the interview which was great because she cannot twist my words now (I'm sure she can TRY but the recorded tape will be proof and if it goes to court I will request she brings that tape in case she does try to twist anything!). I also did sign 1 release for the worker to talk to our pedi because, again, we have nothing to hide! We fully vax and have tried every medication suggested for his acid reflux and blocked tear ducts and our pedi loves us and will speak very highly of us. And I did give her my mothers name and number and my good friends. My SO gave his brothers number and his mothers. (All of which we called immediately to inform them to only answer questions that are asked and not to elaborate too much or give out information that is not requested. I did not sign anything else nor will I. I will not consent to a drug test of me or my baby, to have services provided, or to psychological testing.

I called her supervisor today who said that she would talk to the case manager about knowing the person who reported us (told her she recorded the interview so she could listen to that if need be), she said that she and the case worker talked after the interview and everything that was said was very positive (not sure if she is trying to lul me into a false sense of calm or not!). I told her that the case worker did not seem to be up to date on breastfeeding or co-sleeping and asked to please have her be updated on breastfeeding while on certain medications even though he had formula the entire time I was taking them and that we had showed her the open can of formula and his bottles. And that she be updated on the many benefits of co-sleeping and that the worker had stated "We do not allow co-sleeping", she apologized for the way that was put and said that they do not RECOMMEND co-sleeping but that as long as it is done safely it is the parents choice.
She asked if we had ever had DHHS involved in our home and I said, "No never, this is all very new to us!" and she said that she completely understood and that it can be very scary, especially for young parents, to have someone comr into our home and question our parenting. She said that it did not seem like the case worker didnt believe a word we were saying but that if she stated that she knew the person who reported us that it was understandable that we would feel that way. She said that she will tell the case worker to call our references immediately and if those all line up with our information we gave that the case would be closed immediately.

My son started babbling and laughing in the background as we talked and she asked if that was him and I said, "Yes he is a very vocal little boy!" and we both laughed. I am feeling better about this situation! A lot of the responses I got to yesterdays post scared the shit out of me!

I also talked to a friend of mine who works for Community Concepts and personally knows both the case worker and the supervisor and she said that our case worker likes to use scare tactics but has a horrible follow through and that her supervisor is a very kind, fair woman (so again I am so happy I called her today!). She also said that if they do open a full case that what usually happens is they will ask us to do couples therapy (which we are already doing and I'm in individual therapy but I did not want to give the case worker that information for her to just say I have "Pre existing emotional problems" though stupid stupid me let it slip that I am on Paxil for PPD, I know I'm an idiot! It just slipped out.) and probably have to take a few parenting classes and maybe have a couple of home checks.

Throughout all of this my baby has been babbling and laughing as if to say, "We'll show them mommy!" so both the case worker and supervisor know he is a very happy baby! Everyone who is to be contacted knows to call me immediately after to tell me exactly what was said and I am keeping a written log of interviews and phone calls made and what was said.

I hope they see that we are good parents and that this all blows over but you never know what will happen when CPS gets in your life! One other thing the supervisor said is that she is happy I let them talk to his pedi and family members because that is 1 of the biggest mistakes parents make when they wont let them talk to people who will confirm that the allegations are false and we are good, loving parents. Hopefully everything pans out with those phone calls and the case is immediately dropped!

Thank you to those of you who have had positive, reassuring things to say instead of just scaring me even more! I will continue to update with any phone call or interview I get!
Posted by Anonymous on Mar. 8, 2013 at 11:13 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 8, 2013 at 11:16 AM
Oh and I would stop being anon so it is easier to follow my story but who knows how many CPS workers are on this site from my state!
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Mar. 8, 2013 at 11:23 AM

 So the reason that cps was there was because of your and dh's fighting? I'm glad the visit was positive.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 8, 2013 at 11:41 AM
Because of 1 physical altercation that was reported. The reporter said we were abusive to the baby and neglectful. That I took narcotics after having my wisdom teeth removed and breastfed, that I get piss ass drunk and breastfeed. Just a bunch of false allegations.


Quoting Anonymous:

 So the reason that cps was there was because of your and dh's fighting? I'm glad the visit was positive.


cadditalbrat
by Gold Member on Mar. 8, 2013 at 11:48 AM
1 mom liked this
I'm glad you think everything went well :) hopefully the case gets dropped
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Jennahalt
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 11:52 AM
1 mom liked this
When I had surgery they cleared me to take my pain meds while breastfeeding. Some of them are safe and doesn't get enough in the milk to be a problem.
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mommybug77
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 12:00 PM

 i always tell them I am nursing so they give me something that i can use & still breastfeed.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Mar. 8, 2013 at 12:00 PM

As I said in your last post,  1 physical altercation is domestic violence and it is also 1 too many incidents.  You should not have your children in that situation! 



Quoting Anonymous:

Because of 1 physical altercation that was reported. The reporter said we were abusive to the baby and neglectful. That I took narcotics after having my wisdom teeth removed and breastfed, that I get piss ass drunk and breastfeed. Just a bunch of false allegations.


Quoting Anonymous:

 So the reason that cps was there was because of your and dh's fighting? I'm glad the visit was positive.




Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 8, 2013 at 12:03 PM
I did that as well and then looked it up on kellymom.com just to be sure! I ultimately decided to just pump and dump just in case because I didnt want him to even get a little of the narcotic for a week and a half straight and then have a cranky baby after I stopped taking them! :)


Quoting mommybug77:

 i always tell them I am nursing so they give me something that i can use & still breastfeed.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 8, 2013 at 12:10 PM
Well thats your opinion and I respect that! But without knowing the details of what exactly happened you cant really know if it is a safe environment for my child.

I dont feel that I should have to defend him or I in this matter but I will say that it was an accident. I got elbowed in the face when he was trying to get his car keys from me so that I couldnt leave with his car. I'm sure you will have something to say about me taking his car keys or him trying to take them from me but as soon as it happened he stopped and said "Oh my god are you okay!? I didnt mean to elbow you! I'm so sorry!" it was a total accident and nothing like that has ever happened in the 3 years we have been together.



Quoting Anonymous:

As I said in your last post,  1 physical altercation is domestic violence and it is also 1 too many incidents.  You should not have your children in that situation! 





Quoting Anonymous:

Because of 1 physical altercation that was reported. The reporter said we were abusive to the baby and neglectful. That I took narcotics after having my wisdom teeth removed and breastfed, that I get piss ass drunk and breastfeed. Just a bunch of false allegations.








Quoting Anonymous:

 So the reason that cps was there was because of your and dh's fighting? I'm glad the visit was positive.










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Mrs.Winchester
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 12:16 PM

Wow do you have any idea who made the call?  Someone  must really  not like you!

Quoting Anonymous:

Because of 1 physical altercation that was reported. The reporter said we were abusive to the baby and neglectful. That I took narcotics after having my wisdom teeth removed and breastfed, that I get piss ass drunk and breastfeed. Just a bunch of false allegations.


Quoting Anonymous:

 So the reason that cps was there was because of your and dh's fighting? I'm glad the visit was positive.



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