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DH isn't attracted to me anymore. Edit* UPDATE*

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 154 Replies
2 moms liked this
Yea I know that i have changed a lot in the 13 years we have known each other but come on i was 13 then and have had 3 kids since. He hasn't said anything other than making a few comments on my weight but i am working on that. 15 lbs in a month isn't that bad. It's the little things he does. We barely have sex anymore. If we do I initiate it and he doesn't even act like he enjoys it anymore. He never looks at me. Its like I scare him if I get to close. He has even pushed me away from him and gives me disgusted looks. I know I have low self esteem but he used to be so attentive to me and show me love. Idk what to do anymore. I am so unhappy but we have 3 kids together. I have talked and talked till I am blue in the face about my feelings. Any suggestions on how to make things better.





Edit* thank you ladies. You all have given me great advice. Dh and i have a night alone tonight and i am going to try to talk to him and see if i can get anywhere or anything out of him.
UPDATE*
Dh and I sit down and talked. I just told him that I could not take this anymore. I told him i loved him but if he could not talk to me about what's going on then we are not going to work. He told me that he didn't want to split up. I asked then what was the problem and that he had to be honest with me. It took him a min or two. Finally he said I had changed. My looks and attitude. He said that for one my looks. I have gained weight and he is just nervous that i will keep getting bigger. Ok but i have worked on that. He said he was proud of me for that. He then said I am moving forward and he is staying the same. He says since i had went to school and got a better job and new friends he feels that i would want someone else. I said ok thanks for talking to me and I assured him i loved only him. BUT I didn't feel right. I didn't feel that he was telling me everything. I try so so so much to be near him and show him love and i get pushed away. I call b.s. on the part about me wanting someone else. So i went snooping on his facebook. I have never ever did that. I always trusted him. Well he is talking to this women. I don't know where he met her or who she is. She is tall and skinny. It isn't sexual just talking about our marriage. How I have changed and pushed him to the side. Really whatever bs. That i am just some fat slob and he doesn't want to be with me. He said that for years he has only stayed so i would be ok. Yea fuck that he is a sahd and i support our family and the house and the cooking and the kids. He has been treated like a damn king. But oh well he can have his life back. Hope his GED gets him a good job. He didn't want to split up well sorry I am not dealing with this I am too young for this shit.
Posted by Anonymous on Mar. 8, 2013 at 2:54 PM
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Replies (1-10):
MichaelsMomm122
by Member on Mar. 8, 2013 at 2:56 PM
1 mom liked this
Just keep working on losing weight, sweetie.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Mar. 8, 2013 at 3:05 PM
Thank you. I don't think that is only issue. I only weigh 150. I'm gonna keep working though for me.


Quoting MichaelsMomm122:

Just keep working on losing weight, sweetie.

Paranoai
by Bronze Member on Mar. 8, 2013 at 3:06 PM
7 moms liked this

Maybe he's cheating

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Mar. 8, 2013 at 3:06 PM



Quoting Paranoai:

Maybe he's cheating



Kool_Aide
by Gold Member on Mar. 8, 2013 at 3:08 PM

Why do you keep saying..."but we have 3 kids together" ?

What does that have to do with his feelings towards you? Have you talked to him about it?

momsince04
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 3:09 PM
2 moms liked this
Lose the weight, and become his fantasy. Open up to ideas in the sack, take a minute and think like a man. When he comes home greet him in some sexy underwear. Get dolled up and give yourself a make over. Learn how to give him a lap dance. There are so many things you can do. Just don't be shy about it.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous on Mar. 8, 2013 at 3:09 PM
10 moms liked this

That is so disrespectful of him, I'm sorry. People age, women have babies and their bodies change, that's all a part of life. He doesn't get to mistreat you because your body does something that it's supposed to do, especially if you're exercising and trying to look nice. What happens when you talk to him, does he say anything at all? Don't let him get you down, YOU are worthy of so many things, you deserve a GOOD man. Don't let him make you feel badly about yourself.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Mar. 8, 2013 at 3:09 PM

I'm sorry. But sometimes people change. You two really need to sit down and talk. Life is too short for you to be unhappy and him to be an unattentive douche.

KylesMonkey
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 3:10 PM
1 mom liked this

Have you ever read the book "Fireproof"?  Or seen the movie?  I'm not saying there's a one size fits all cure for marriages that aren't what they used to be, but there were some points in that book that were/are very useful and make it easier for both of you to see each other with more love in your heart.  Good luck.  Weight usually isn't the problem or the answer.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Mar. 8, 2013 at 3:11 PM
They ate what keep me going and trying to make things better. I could do it on my own no problem but he is a great father and really all i know. And yea i have talked to him even suggested counseling. Idk


Quoting Kool_Aide:

Why do you keep saying..."but we have 3 kids together" ?

What does that have to do with his feelings towards you? Have you talked to him about it?


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