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He just told me I can't go on vacation with my mom edit

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 69 Replies

My mother is taking me all the woman in the family  on a cruise next month. She and my dad won the lottery (not  millions, I think it was about $75,000 though) and she decided with part of the money, she wanted to take all the adult women in the family on a cruise. I have been looking forward to this for months.

My DH got into a car accident last year and still can't work, he can do basic things around the house but working for him just isn't an option. He gets disability but that basically covers his medical expenses and not much else. He wasn't approved for disability until 6 months after the accident and the insurance only covers 80% so  in addition to paying for his current medical expenses, he is paying off the last 6 months as well so that is mostly where the money is going.

The judge did lower his child support but it is still more then he can afford on his disability so we have been paying it from our savings. We are getting by on mostly my income and the child support I get for my children but we have been having to use some of our savings on the household as well. I told him that in 6 months, we are going to run out of savings at which point, I don't know what we are going to do but at that point, the money won't be there for child support. By then he will have paid off the first 6 months of his medical expenses so that will free up some, thankfully but it still won't be enough to pay the full amount of CS and after the cuts we have already made, we can't take anymore from our household budget to make up the difference.

I am an RN and I have been working overtime for the last year (50 hours a week). Instead of taking my personal time off hours, I have been cashing them in when I am allowed. I haven't taken a vacation or sick day in almost a year. But the week I am going on the cruise, I am taking one weeks worth of my personal time off hours. The problem is, when you take time off and use your PTO hours, they don't let you put it in as overtime, you can only do 40 hours where as I am used to getting 50 and since overtime is time and a half, it's like making 55 hours.

When he found out that I will only be betting paid for 40 hours that week, he told me (yes, told me) that I couldn't go. WHAT? I have been working about 50) hours a week for the last year, I am burnt out and I need the time off and I want to spend some time with the family and especially my grandma who probably won't live much longer. My children will be at their dad's house that week (it is the week of spring break for us and it's his year to have them on spring break) so it's not like I am asking him to watch my kids while I go or anything. He says that we can't afford for me to go right now, this trip will not cost us anything but the overtime. He thinks that I should stay home, save the PTO hours and since my kids will be with their dad anyway, I should work 5, 12 hour shifts that week instead of my normal 4 (which again, is still overtime) to make more money.

I just need a break and I am so mad that after all I have done to pick up the slack for him, he is trying to take this from me. I feel like I am nothing but a paycheck to him and I am tired of it. Am I really wrong to want this one break?

I should have been more clear, I have every intention of going and I am even considering taking what's left of our savings account and putting it away since he has already spent over half of it already paying his child support

Posted by Anonymous on Mar. 9, 2013 at 10:46 AM
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Replies (1-10):
MrsDavidB25
by Stacey on Mar. 9, 2013 at 10:48 AM
6 moms liked this

 Bullshit. You go and have a wonderful time.

bethgoedeken
by Silver Member on Mar. 9, 2013 at 10:49 AM

Fuck him! Go on your trip and have a wonderful time.

EAzizM
by on Mar. 9, 2013 at 10:50 AM
3 moms liked this
Why the hell do you need permission? Go and have fun.
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catrig
by Platinum Member on Mar. 9, 2013 at 10:51 AM
Have a good trip. You can work extra another week if it's that big of a deal.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Mar. 9, 2013 at 10:51 AM
You better go! Have fun!
MommyBoha
by Ruby Member on Mar. 9, 2013 at 10:51 AM
This

Quoting EAzizM:

Why the hell do you need permission? Go and have fun.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Sassy762
by CAFE SASSY HBIC on Mar. 9, 2013 at 10:51 AM
1 mom liked this

He is your DH NOT your Master. GO on the vacation and tell him to "Suck It Up".....

                             Betty Boop Lets go to the disco.    Betty Jean Newell Smith

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Mar. 9, 2013 at 10:52 AM
Go! Seriously, just go.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Mar. 9, 2013 at 10:52 AM
go, have fun, share photos with us (I live vicariously through others lol) and tell him to be a greater at walmart or something to take the slack off of you entirely!
MooseMomma
by Platinum Member on Mar. 9, 2013 at 10:52 AM
Oh hell no. Go!!!
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