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Your kid is a brat.

Posted by on Mar. 9, 2013 at 7:24 PM
  • 19 Replies

something I saw on facebook -- a pic of a grumpy looking kid with the caption "When I was a kid, they didn't call it behavioral disorders.  They called it being a little brat."

My thought is --- "Who the fuck cares what you call it, as long as something is done to address it."

My second thought is "Brats are created by parents (mainly due to over-indulgence and inconsistent and unpredictable discipline).  Behavioral disorders (ADHD, ODD, and others) go above and beyond parenting mistakes."

Either way, it is parents' responsiblity to do something about it (the difference lies in whether the parent is or is not to blame for the problem existing in the first place). 


Your thoughts?

by on Mar. 9, 2013 at 7:24 PM
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Replies (1-10):
delilahsmom1177
by on Mar. 9, 2013 at 7:37 PM

I think my friend's ODD and ADHD are an excuse for my friend to not parent. She was never taught.. her parents sucked... Her DD def does have some issues she was born with but they are easily workable. Instead she has her on 2 different meds at 6 years old.

I'm a tattooed,pagan,pro-choice,pro-legalizing marijuana,pro-gay marriage,anti-war,non-vaxing,tree hugging,animal loving,book reading,animal testing free,depression battling, trying to raise a free spirit and letting her be who she is but still teaching her important life lessons,fighting for equal rights at the same time,don't like it get over it.

Maks1mommy
by Emerald Member on Mar. 9, 2013 at 7:39 PM
I agree with you.
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Snapdragon88
by Ruby Member on Mar. 9, 2013 at 7:43 PM
1 mom liked this
Usually, like you said, it's the lack of consistent discipline. My friend's son has been out of control lately and she just says, "I have no idea why he's acting this way!!!" Really? You don't know? Because I could name off a few reasons...
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one_on_the_way
by Silver Member on Mar. 9, 2013 at 7:44 PM



Quoting delilahsmom1177:

I think my friend's ODD and ADHD are an excuse for my friend to not parent. She was never taught.. her parents sucked... Her DD def does have some issues she was born with but they are easily workable. Instead she has her on 2 different meds at 6 years old.


Are the medications 'working'?  How does your friend 'not parent'?

one_on_the_way
by Silver Member on Mar. 9, 2013 at 7:45 PM



Quoting Snapdragon88:

Usually, like you said, it's the lack of consistent discipline. My friend's son has been out of control lately and she just says, "I have no idea why he's acting this way!!!" Really? You don't know? Because I could name off a few reasons...


Do you name off a few reasons.....or do you keep your mouth shut out of fear of 'over-stepping boundaries'?

JLS2388
by on Mar. 9, 2013 at 7:47 PM

I think a lot of times, parents use ADHD, ADD ect as excuses for their poor parenting. I understand they are real and some kids have them but many parents just say that to excuse their chidlren's poor behavior. Even with the kids who actually have it, that doesn't mean the parent can just no parent their child, they still have to, it's just harder

Mweddle
by on Mar. 9, 2013 at 7:50 PM

 I agree.  I have 4 children.  1 has ADHD and probably ODD and she is difficult.  People would think I was a crappy parent because she acts really naughty at times but I know its something beyond her control. (eta. She gets consistent discipline as do my other children)  People who say ADHD is not real has never met my daughter or a child who really struggles with it.  It sucks.  I hate it for her.  I hate being blamed for it but I really hate how it impacts her relationships with others.

Snapdragon88
by Ruby Member on Mar. 9, 2013 at 7:53 PM
I've only opened my mouth once and she got super defensive. She told him about 9 times that if he threw something across the room one more time they would have to leave. I mentioned to her that he's not listening because he knows she won't follow through. She got all pissy. Oh well... and I told her the other day that I couldn't watch him anymore because he just would not stop hitting my ds. Grrrr!!!! I love the girl... but she needs to take a class or something.

Quoting one_on_the_way:




Quoting Snapdragon88:

Usually, like you said, it's the lack of consistent discipline. My friend's son has been out of control lately and she just says, "I have no idea why he's acting this way!!!" Really? You don't know? Because I could name off a few reasons...



Do you name off a few reasons.....or do you keep your mouth shut out of fear of 'over-stepping boundaries'?

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FemaleRacer
by Member on Mar. 9, 2013 at 7:54 PM

I'm glad that you posted this.  I have a daughter who is autistic.  Sometimes she can be a brat. (Sometimes do to her autism and sensory disorders, and sometimes just becuase she's a brat.  If it is a situation (like sudden loud noises) that is out of her control then I step in and help.  If you is trying to self sooth and needs guidence I will step in.  If she is simply being bratty and needs to get her stuff together then that is exactly what I make her do.  I have explained her autism if she says something to a stranger that shows her medical problem.  I do not do this as an excuse, but rather an explanation that I follow up with a discusion with my daughter.

Sometimes in life we have to let the resposibility fall where it should.  My daughter started TaeKwonDo about 1 1/2 months ago.  The loud noise is very hard for her.  Ear plugs do not work and headsets are not allowed in competitions.  She lost her temper once and I backed up the consequence of her having to step off the dojo mats until she could show respect.  I talked to her about the noise and she still wants to keep going. 

 Sometimes in life there is not alternative option that is easier for a person to handle.  This is an important life lesson.  If I cater to her every need what will she do when I am not there in the future?  What is best for her both now and in the future?

Snapdragon88
by Ruby Member on Mar. 9, 2013 at 7:56 PM
What does ADHD even mean? I know what it stands for, but what does it mean for your daughter? Is it a self control issue or what? I'm honestly curious what it looks like because I've never known a child that had ADHD.

Quoting Mweddle:

 I agree.  I have 4 children.  1 has ADHD and probably ODD and she is difficult.  People would think I was a crappy parent because she acts really naughty at times but I know its something beyond her control. (eta. She gets consistent discipline as do my other children)  People who say ADHD is not real has never met my daughter or a child who really struggles with it.  It sucks.  I hate it for her.  I hate being blamed for it but I really hate how it impacts her relationships with others.

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