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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Did you struggle growing up? This makes me so mad! I don't understand him.

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

This isn't a bash post.. I'm honestly curious. My parents were young parents, 17.  For me, my parents were for a very short time on PA about a year.  My dad has always been an extremely hard worker.Right now he's almost 60 and works 70 hrs a week driving semi ( and has since I was a child) so he can afford my mom's medical insurance because she has stage 4  breast cancer. I feel bad for him, he's getting older and tired.  When we were growing up, my parents ALWAYS provided to the best of their ablility, we may not have always had the latest clothes and I remember one time my dad actually had to take a minimum wage job at a tourist attraction for money  when he got laid off and my mom had to get our christmas presents from a church.  My mom was always there to greet us when we got off the bus (SAHM) and she was the best! There were times when my family struggled, but we always had a nice FAMILY Christmas and we would always get the gift we wanted for birthdays or Christmas even if its the only thing we got.  Many times my dad had to take two or 3 jobs to pay bills before he got another good job and our family was filled with love.  I remember one year when I was 7, I wanted a My little pony paradise estate and my dad did extra work so I could get one. They are in a much better financial situation now, but they barely had high school educations when they had kids.  They were the best I could ask for.

My brother loves to make my parents feel awful about the things he didn't have.  He tells them, I don't want my kids raised poor like we were (Meanwhile, he delivers pizzas, cheats on his wife and treats his kids awfully).. Not only has he told my mom to "Stop using chemo as an excuse" to not watch his kids (She gets it every two weeks and is sick for about 3 days after)..  he tells my mom that my dad was a shitty dad because he didn't get everything he wanted.  He's always saying things like "my kids will never grow up like we did" to my mom constantly.  Sometimes she cries over it and my heart breaks.  He's so mean to her and I just don't understand why.  I have another brother who adores my parents as well.  He's even gone so far as to say my parents were abusive to him to other members of our family.  This NEVER happened and it makes me so sad for them!

Posted by Anonymous on Mar. 11, 2013 at 1:11 PM
Replies (11-20):
sampson200
by on Mar. 11, 2013 at 1:23 PM

My parents were married at 18 and 20. I was born when my mother was 21.

They worked very hard for everything.

My sisters nor I ever felt that we wanted for anything.

Sure, money was tight, but we had love and laughter and got toys on holidays and for birthdays and had vacations that were saved up for.

We know we were blessed. And never felt that materialism is where love or happiness is.

your brother is a Grade-A asshole and as a family, I would be dropping him pretty quickly and telling him with no softness that he needs to grow up and get over whatever perceived notions of 'unfair' he feels he had as a child. I don't allow toxic people like that in my life, family or not.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 11, 2013 at 1:24 PM

It all started because I visited my parents this past weekend. They live 7 hours away and I brought pics of the kids for my mom.  My brother than went on a huge tirade about how we never had pics taken when we were kids because we were "too poor".. My mom said that she always bought the school pictures, but bought the small package.  He said "yeah, but you never took us anywhere to get professional pics done, I'll NEVER do that to my kids" and I got upset with him and told him not to be so rude and he started screaming and left.  He's 30 years old... Not a baby.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 11, 2013 at 1:24 PM


That sounds like my family <3

Quoting sampson200:

My parents were married at 18 and 20. I was born when my mother was 21.

They worked very hard for everything.

My sisters nor I ever felt that we wanted for anything.

Sure, money was tight, but we had love and laughter and got toys on holidays and for birthdays and had vacations that were saved up for.

We know we were blessed. And never felt that materialism is where love or happiness is.

your brother is a Grade-A asshole and as a family, I would be dropping him pretty quickly and telling him with no softness that he needs to grow up and get over whatever perceived notions of 'unfair' he feels he had as a child. I don't allow toxic people like that in my life, family or not.



Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Mar. 11, 2013 at 1:26 PM
wow. does he not know that his kids shouldnt even be around her after a chemo treatment because it can leach out of her skin and into theirs? he sounds like a total dipshit :(
PISCIS29
by Gold Member on Mar. 11, 2013 at 1:26 PM
Add a lil lemon juice to heal the asses wounds.

Quoting D.O.E.:

holy shit......i would beat him with a 2x4. in a field. and then leave him there for the night.

what an asshole

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kryptomom
by Gold Member on Mar. 11, 2013 at 1:28 PM

I have a sister like that.  She insists we were beaten and degraded all the time.  When I dispute it, she claims I wasn't around to see it.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 11, 2013 at 1:29 PM

I think it bothers me the most because she's a good person who has tried her best and loved us.  I know she won't be around for a long time (i'm tearing up just writing that) and I don't want her to regret anything :(

Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Mar. 11, 2013 at 1:29 PM
We did not have the greatest childhood however I tell my Mom that she did the best that she could and that I will strive to do better and do the best that I can for my children. My grandparents physically,mentally and sexually abused my Mom and her siblings growing up. We were never sexually abuses, physical abuse was minimal and mental abuse was probably the worst. So we didn't have the best life but it wasn't the worst either :)
sampson200
by on Mar. 11, 2013 at 1:29 PM

My father once apologized for not trying harder to get me into the private college I was accepted to, instead of the state college.

We didn't have the funds, we were middle class, thus no finacial aid and they were going to have THREE children in college for 2 years at one point so we were told we all had to attend state colleges.

I would so sad that my father felt badly, years later, about this.

He paid for ALL of us to get through colleges; and my sisters even attended a Big Ten school, Indiana University, with education degrees and graduated magna cum laude and I graduated with honors at my college.

I mean, the man worked his way up to vice president of a huge company with no college degree for 40 years, got all of his children through college, still married to the same gal he fell in love with in high school, has traveled the world and did it ALL FOR US, and here he is, feeling regret because I couldn't go to a private college?

He got a huge hug that day and a "Dad, stop talking crazy. I love my life today" talk from me.

Quoting heresjohnny:

I also grew up poor. I love my parents and would NEVER throw it in their faces. A couple years ago my dad actually apologized to me about my poor upbringing. I just laughed and said there was nothing to apologize for. My brothers and I are all doing well enough financially, have no addictions, and no criminal records. There's more to being a good parent than providing material things.


spooky415
by Ruby Member on Mar. 11, 2013 at 1:31 PM
i grew up with several different family units, all with different dynamics. The best one, despite not having a lot of money, was with my aunt and uncle. While they weren't perfect and my uncle held some values I don't agree with, they gave me what I felt was the most loving home and truly cared about my wellbeing the most. However, money was an issue and I never want my son to have to experience the insecurity I sometimes felt about bills being paid. Even though I was young-it was still hinted at a lot that money was tight. I would lay in bed at night and worry about electricity and stuff like that. I would worry about my aunt being able to get to work. But if they knew that I had felt that way, it probably would have broken their heart. I think because I was shuffled around so much I kind of just picked up on any type of instability because I'd learned that it could affect me directly. And I would never ever tell them that i worried about it because they did their best to give me a family life where I felt loved and wanted.
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