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Need help from Moms who don't combine their income with their DH,SO etc..

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 21 Replies

My SO and I (not married) have one joint account , both my paycheck and his goes into the same account. We always combine our money and every week like clockwork we fight about money. He spends his money and stupid shit that is no necessary. We live paycheck to paycheck and the second we get payed he is already looking at things to spend it with. It pisses me off. We are 2 months behind on our electricity bill and he doesn't seem to even care. I have been paying just 100 every 2 weeks because I don't want to get our service shut off. Anyways he told me he spent like 300 dollars on something useless. He was trying to help his cousin get insurance and he ended paying all of it for him. I was pissed ! He knows we still owe over 300 in the electric bill and we have 2 car payments every 2 weeks. I'm just tired of fighting and I need help. How do you do it with your SO if you don't combine your money? Who pays what ? Or do you split everything 50/50? How is it working for you?

Posted by Anonymous on Mar. 11, 2013 at 8:15 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Mar. 11, 2013 at 8:19 PM

When we were living together he paid the rent and I paid utilities. We split the groceries.

FL2AK
by on Mar. 11, 2013 at 8:21 PM
We each get a monthly allowance so we don't have to ask each other for money our be accountable to each other. Everything else goes into the joint account.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 11, 2013 at 8:22 PM

bump

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Mar. 11, 2013 at 8:24 PM
1 mom liked this
good thing you aren't married now you can have a clean break. He will ruin you financially if you stay in this relationship.
MysticIceWater
by Saphyres mommy on Mar. 11, 2013 at 8:26 PM

We put our money together, but We always consult each other before either one of us spends ANYTHING! We sit and talk about the budget and the kids together. We always know where everything is going. Working together has helped us start 3 college funds (1 for each kid) and 3 life insurance policies (1 for each kid). We work as a team! I suggest you telling your SO if his spending habits don't change quickly you will be getting seperate accounts, and splitting the bills No ifs ands or buts about it! And if his half falls behind out the door he goes! You can't live like that.

MistyMoo
by Ruby Member on Mar. 11, 2013 at 8:28 PM
Well, I'm not married to my SO either and I own my house. I pay pretty much everything, but if I need help he will give me money. He has some debt that I'd like him to hammer away on, so I don't have a problem with paying almost everything... When his debt is paid off I will expect it to be 50-50 though.. Everything includes: my car, insurance, mortgage, electricity, heat... I do make him pay half Of the water though because he loves his baths... He pays for everything else.. I don't like the idea of having a joint account..
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CNYmom80
by on Mar. 11, 2013 at 8:28 PM
Been married 10 years and we have never had a joint account at our banks. We get paid, we pool money for bills and whatever we need then the rest is up to us. I will never have an account with anybody other than my kids, and theirs is strictly savings!
mich.el.le
by on Mar. 11, 2013 at 8:28 PM


Quoting Anonymous:

good thing you aren't married now you can have a clean break. He will ruin you financially if you stay in this relationship.

That's exactly what I was thinking.Since I'm sure op isn't looking for ''kick him out'' advice..

Why don't you have a joint account for things like rent, electricity bill, etc. Make him pay his own car and insurance and you pay yours. Anything else that you have to pay together, goes in the joint account. If he can't be responsible enough to pay his part of the bills I would kick his ass out, FAST.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 11, 2013 at 8:32 PM


Quoting MysticIceWater:

We put our money together, but We always consult each other before either one of us spends ANYTHING! We sit and talk about the budget and the kids together. We always know where everything is going. Working together has helped us start 3 college funds (1 for each kid) and 3 life insurance policies (1 for each kid). We work as a team! I suggest you telling your SO if his spending habits don't change quickly you will be getting seperate accounts, and splitting the bills No ifs ands or buts about it! And if his half falls behind out the door he goes! You can't live like that.

Thank you ! It seems like you guys are definetly doing the right thing. When I spend like $30 on something I feel guitly for not telling him even if it's for our kids or the househould. I do tell him everytime I spend some money, but like you said I never would spend such a large amount without consutling him first. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 11, 2013 at 9:21 PM

bump

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