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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Train Up Your Child, Like the Duggars-Abuse or No?

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 89 Replies

How barbaric is this??

http://web.archive.org/web/20081119041414/http://www.achristianhome.org/to_train_up_a_child.htm



Quote:

TRAINING NOT TO TOUCH
There is much satisfaction in training up a child. It is easy and challenging. When my children were able to crawl (in the case of one, roll) around the room, I set up training sessions.

Try it yourself. Place an appealing object where they can reach it, maybe in a "No-no" corner or on an apple juice table (That's where the coffee table once sat). When they spy it and make a dive for it, in a calm voice say, "No, don't touch it." They will already be familiar with the "No," so they will pause, look at you in wonder and then turn around and grab it. Switch their hand once and simultaneously say, "No." Remember, you are not disciplining, you are training. One spat with a little switch is enough. They will again pull back their hand and consider the relationship between the object, their desire, the command and the little reinforcing pain. It may take several times, but if you are consistent, they will learn to consistently obey, even in your absence.



Quote:

Get set for training. Hold him where he can easily reach your glasses. Look him right in the eye. He reaches out. Don't pull back. Don't defend yourself.' Calmly say, No." If anything, lower your voice, don't raise it. Don't sound more serious than usual. Remember you are establishing a pattern of command to be used the rest of his youth. When he touches the glasses, again say, "No," and accompany your command with minor pain. He will pull his hand back and try to comprehend the association of grabbing the glasses and pain. (I usually just thumped their little hand with my index finger. I never knew one to cry. They don't even know that you did it. They think it was the glasses, or perhaps the "No" itself causes pain.) Inevitably, he will return to the bait to test his new theory. Sure enough, again the glasses caused pain; and the pain is always accompanied by a quiet little "No." It may take one or two more tries for him to give up his career as glasses snatcher, but he will.

Through this process of association the child will involuntarily recall the pain every time he hears the word "No." There comes a time when your word alone is sufficient to gain obedience.

You can also stop him from assaulting his mother with a bottle held by the nipple. The same holds true for hair and beard pulling. You name it, the infant can be trained to obey. Do you want to wrestle with him through his entire youth, nagging him to compliance, threatening, placing things out of reach, fearing what he might get into next? Or would it be better to take a little time to train? If nothing else, training will result in saving you time.




Posted by Anonymous on Mar. 15, 2013 at 6:44 AM
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Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Mar. 15, 2013 at 6:47 AM

OBEDIENCE TRAINING--BITING BABIES
One particularly painful experience of nursing mothers is the biting baby. My wife did not waste time finding a cure. When the baby bit, she pulled hair (an alternative has to be sought for baldheaded babies). Understand, the baby is not being punished, just conditioned. A baby learns not to stick his finger in his eyes or bite his tongue through the negative associations accompanying it. It requires no understanding or reasoning. Somewhere in the brain that information is unconsciously stored. After two or three times of biting, with the accompanying head hurting, the child programs that information away for his own comfort. The biting habit is cured before it starts. This is not discipline. It is obedience training.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Mar. 15, 2013 at 6:47 AM

That's stupid.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Mar. 15, 2013 at 6:48 AM

COME WHEN I CALL YOU
One father tells of his training sessions with each new toddler. He sets aside an evening for "booty" camp, which is a boot camp for toddlers. The child of ten to twelve months is left alone to become deeply interested in a toy or some delightful object. From across the room or just inside the other room, the father calls the child. If he ignores the call, the father goes to him and explains the necessity of immediately coming when called, and then leads him to the father's chair. The child thus led through these paces is being programmed.

He is returned to the toy and left alone long enough to again become engrossed. Another call, and, if no response, the father gives a patient explanation and demonstration of the desired response. The parent, having assured himself of the child's understanding, once again sets up the situation and calls the child. This time, if there is not an immediate response the child is lightly spanked and lectured. The father continues this throughout the evening until the child readily and immediately responds to a summons. Thereafter, until the child leaves home, he is expected to drop everything and come upon the first call. As long as the parents remain consistent, the child will consistently obey. This "obedience training" is carried out in the utmost patience and concentration. The spanking should not be viewed as punishment, but as reinforcement to commands.

XnikoX
by Gold Member on Mar. 15, 2013 at 6:49 AM
1 mom liked this

Ya I definitely dont agree with the "Training up your child" crap. Im sorry but children are not animals to be trained. Yes you need to teach them....but this particular way. No.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Mar. 15, 2013 at 6:49 AM

STEPS TO OBEDIENCE
One of our girls who developed mobility early had a fascination with crawling up the stairs. At four months she was too unknowing to be punished for disobedience. But for her own good, we attempted to train her not to climb the stairs by coordinating the voice command of "No" with little spats on the bare legs. The switch was a twelve-inch long, one-eighth-inch diameter sprig from a willow tree.

Such was her fascination with climbing that four or five sessions had not made her stop. The thought of further spankings was disconcerting, so I conceived an alternative. After one more spanking, I laid the switch on the bottom step. We later observed her crawl to the stairs and start the ascent, only to halt at the first step and stare at the switch. She backed off and never again attempted to climb the stairs, even after the switch was removed.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Mar. 15, 2013 at 6:52 AM
2 moms liked this

I take my nipple away. If he's playing then he's not hungry anymore and the only time he bites is when he's playing. If you take the nipple away then they will also learn the effect of the action. 


Quoting Anonymous:

OBEDIENCE TRAINING--BITING BABIES
One particularly painful experience of nursing mothers is the biting baby. My wife did not waste time finding a cure. When the baby bit, she pulled hair (an alternative has to be sought for baldheaded babies). Understand, the baby is not being punished, just conditioned. A baby learns not to stick his finger in his eyes or bite his tongue through the negative associations accompanying it. It requires no understanding or reasoning. Somewhere in the brain that information is unconsciously stored. After two or three times of biting, with the accompanying head hurting, the child programs that information away for his own comfort. The biting habit is cured before it starts. This is not discipline. It is obedience training.



Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Mar. 15, 2013 at 6:53 AM

maybe you should try hairpulling like this mom did...j/k


Quoting Anonymous:

I take my nipple away. If he's playing then he's not hungry anymore and the only time he bites is when he's playing. If you take the nipple away then they will also learn the effect of the action. 


Quoting Anonymous:

OBEDIENCE TRAINING--BITING BABIES
One particularly painful experience of nursing mothers is the biting baby. My wife did not waste time finding a cure. When the baby bit, she pulled hair (an alternative has to be sought for baldheaded babies). Understand, the baby is not being punished, just conditioned. A baby learns not to stick his finger in his eyes or bite his tongue through the negative associations accompanying it. It requires no understanding or reasoning. Somewhere in the brain that information is unconsciously stored. After two or three times of biting, with the accompanying head hurting, the child programs that information away for his own comfort. The biting habit is cured before it starts. This is not discipline. It is obedience training.





Anonymous
by Anonymous on Mar. 15, 2013 at 6:53 AM
1 mom liked this

This is frightening.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Mar. 15, 2013 at 6:53 AM

bump

lowencope
by Platinum Member on Mar. 15, 2013 at 6:55 AM
I'm wow. Sounds very old fashioned.
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