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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

dh thinks he and his son should still go on their fishing trip More info UPDATE

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 269 Replies

After we have already had to cancel our family vacation due to lack of funds. DH's company closed down his store and until they open up the new on in August, he doesn't have any income except unemployment but since he can't get his child support reduced, just about all of his unemployment is going to child support. I still have my job but of course going from two incomes to one has meant we have had to cut a lot of things, including our family vacation. DH has a son from another relationship (all of my kids are with him) and every year, they take a fishing trip together. The trip is over 300 miles away and DH has a boat so to bring the boat and with his truck, that is a few hundred dollars in gas. Plus the other expenses for the trip it is well over $500.

Yesterday, DH mentioned the trip. I assumed after all the cuts we have had to make, the trip would be cut too. No, he thinks they should still go. So our kids get no vacation, we have had to cut quite a bit around the house but he still thinks taking SS on a fishing trip is ok.

Ok,.thanks for letting me vent, I was just so pissed when he brought it up

I told him HELL NO. Just like our family vacation, eating out, cable and all the other cuts we have made, a fishing trip is not a necessity. Basically, I am the only one bringing in income to our household and I am not ok with our household having to give up even more so that they can take a trip.

This question is being asked a lot so I thought I would answer here.

Yes, SS is invited on the family vacation every year. DH gets 2 solid weeks with him in the summer though the court order says that he and SS's mom have to work out together when that will be. Sometimes it happens that we schedule the vacation at the same time SS's mom does because that is the only time me or DH (back when he was working) could get off work. In those cases, he doesn't come but he is always invited

I just found out that not only has DH been sneaking money for this trip, he has also been taking money and taking his son out a couple times a month (when he would pick him up on Friday). He hasn't taken our kids out in months because of the lack of money. My paycheck comes in on Friday and I am opening a new account in my name. I will pay the bills and buy the food but he will have no access to it. In total, he has been taking about $250 a month while the rest of us have made all these cuts and I am working overtime. I haven't told him yet, he will find out on Friday. As far as savings, we each have retirements but we don't have a joint savings account.


Posted by Anonymous on Mar. 19, 2013 at 4:57 PM
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Replies (1-10):
MrsDavidB25
by Stacey on Mar. 19, 2013 at 4:58 PM

 What did he say when you told him hell no?

Yogamom08
by on Mar. 19, 2013 at 4:58 PM
2 moms liked this
I agree with you
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 19, 2013 at 5:03 PM
5 moms liked this

He got mad and said this was their "bonding time". What about our kids? He doesn't need to take a trip with them or me. I told him if we can find $500, I am taking it and planning a trip for the family



Quoting MrsDavidB25:

 What did he say when you told him hell no?



aphrodite7400
by Silver Member on Mar. 19, 2013 at 5:04 PM

does he fish and catch anything? maybe you can make some fish meals in the future with what he catches.

jadedcynic
by Nerdalicious on Mar. 19, 2013 at 5:06 PM
6 moms liked this

Is there another way he and his oldest son can get together that doesn't cost money? I would hate to take away something that was important to them like that without some kind of low cost alternative. I know there has to be some kind of alternate activity they can do like camping without fishing.

Roxygurl
by Emerald Member on Mar. 19, 2013 at 5:07 PM
Sounds like this year the trip needs to be cancelled. If he wants to bond with his son bond with him at the house during the summer when I assume the kid isn't in school.

Shit happens and you have to adapt and that means no luxeries like a fishing trip.
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M0M0F03
by Silver Member on Mar. 19, 2013 at 5:07 PM
4 moms liked this

Tell him to find a local lake or stream and make it a day trip if he wants the time with his son.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 19, 2013 at 5:07 PM

Not over $500 worth and neither me nor our kids eat fish



Quoting aphrodite7400:

does he fish and catch anything? maybe you can make some fish meals in the future with what he catches.



TypeAndRun
by Bronze Member on Mar. 19, 2013 at 5:07 PM

nope    vacations are a luxery and you don't NEED them.  You would like them

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 19, 2013 at 5:08 PM
9 moms liked this

The way I see it, he gets to stay at home now until August, he can use that time to spend with his son



Quoting jadedcynic:

Is there another way he and his oldest son can get together that doesn't cost money? I would hate to take away something that was important to them like that without some kind of low cost alternative. I know there has to be some kind of alternate activity they can do like camping without fishing.



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