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who is to blame, moms or dads?

Posted by on Mar. 20, 2013 at 2:48 PM
  • 54 Replies



Question: do you believe that youth sports should involve winning, losing and special recognition for exemplary performance?





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Total Votes: 108

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DH and i were having a discussion last night about the "everyone is a winner" trend in youth sports that has developed in recent years. you know.. where everyone gets a trophy, scores aren't kept, etc etc.

he was saying that he thought that mothers had the most to do with it. i said that i didn't know a single mother personally who thought healthy competition (compete with winners, losers, and recognition for exemplary performance) was a bad thing. he couldn't believe that a dad would feel that way - he doesn't know a single man who thinks that healthy competition is a problem. i said that i believe that it is likely that the changes were brought about by moms AND dads.

so moms, please tell me what you think about 'everyone is a winner, trophies for all, etc' in youth sports. i want to show him the results of the poll later and would love to hear your thoughts on the trend too.

by on Mar. 20, 2013 at 2:48 PM
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Replies (1-10):
by ☆Mrs.Winchester☆ on Mar. 20, 2013 at 2:52 PM
Here when they play t ball everyone bats, everyone runs, no outs, no score. I told dh we arent putting dd in it.
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by on Mar. 20, 2013 at 3:00 PM

I really don't know, I always thought it was some mother who thought her child deserved an award because they felt bad when everyone else got one and they didn't.   Where I live we don't do that.  The only sport where everyone gets a turn is T-ball and that's because it's a teaching experience,  each child has the opportunity to play every position, everyone bats (they do get out if they can't hit it 3 times) and we don't keep score for the first two years I think.   My boys played tackle football starting at age 8  and  they started wrestling at the age of 4 and baseball started when they were 5.  They never recieved medals or awards they didn't earn. 

by Anonymous 1 on Mar. 20, 2013 at 3:04 PM
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I don't think everyone should get a trophy. With that said I think sports is overly competitive and I believe in the long run can really hurt kids self image. I'm not a mom who shields her kids from reality but honestly after some experiences with youth sports I'd rather my kids do something else
by on Mar. 20, 2013 at 3:05 PM

I honestly think a mum would do something like this.

by on Mar. 20, 2013 at 3:06 PM
I just think if the kids continued sports theyd be highly disappointed when not everyone wins
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by Gold Member on Mar. 20, 2013 at 3:08 PM
I honestly have thought it was pushed by these psychologists who don't want our kids exposed to any negative emotion, including being told the word "no" at two years old when they do something wrong.
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by on Mar. 20, 2013 at 3:09 PM
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It's gotta be the moms.

Personally, I do not like the idea of everyone getting a trophy. How can we encourage children to try their hardest, if we give them something for not trying at all?

by Ruby Member on Mar. 20, 2013 at 3:10 PM
I don't know that its such a bad thing for like under 4 but after that they need to start understanding not everyone wins. My dd1 is 5 and doing the science fair and 4H this year as they have 1st 2nd and 3rd place. I think its good for her. She's striving to do the best project she can because she wants to place, but understands how proud DH and I are of her even if she doesn't because she is trying her hardest
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by Kim on Mar. 20, 2013 at 3:13 PM

I think it is the moms that caused this movement. In my hometown, more of the moms are at the school/organizations complaining that their kids are not getting enough play time or that their kids should be first string. Give me a break! 

by on Mar. 20, 2013 at 3:23 PM

I like competition, winners and losers. sports should be about understanding that the goal is to win, how to acheive that goal, and that everyone playing has feelings. So don't be a sore winner or looser, let the kid that sucks play anyway, etc. So maybe I am a hybrid.

I think it is fine for the first few years of sports for 1st to get the big trophy and everyone else gets a smaller one. So everyone gets a treasure for their efforts, but the best players get the best trophy. give the kids that taste of success. Maybe around 7 or 8, only the top 2 or 3 teams get trophys.

I plan to coach my kids when they get a little older. I will try to find something positive about each player so they can have special recognition at least once in the season. Everyone can't be MVP everygame, but everyone can do something noteable at least once.

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