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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Am I obligated to...

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 48 Replies
Am I obligated to tell family about my miscarriage?

Here's the back story..fil just texted me to tell me that dh's younger brother and his "fiancée" (he's 21 and has already had 4 fiancées lol) are expecting a baby. I said congrats and all that. Then fil asked when we would be having another. I told him that since I had a miscarriage last September, I wanted to wait a little while before trying again.
Well long story short, he's super pissed that this was the first he was hearing of the miscarriage. Dh and his father are not close at all. He lives in fl we live in pa and fil wasn't ever really in dh's life until we got pregnant with ds. He says that's as a grandparent he has the right to know and a whole bunch of other stuff.

Is he right? Are we obligated to tell family that we had a miscarriage?!
Posted by Anonymous on Mar. 21, 2013 at 1:06 PM
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Replies (1-10):
sandra_t00
by ChaChi on Mar. 21, 2013 at 1:07 PM
1 mom liked this
No. He is wrong
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crashblossom
by on Mar. 21, 2013 at 1:08 PM

I didn't tell anybody about mine. It's absolutely nobody's business but your own, and DH/SO's if they're in the picture.

Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
Cmgmqmmom
by Sass Queen on Mar. 21, 2013 at 1:09 PM
None of his business. It's an emotional thing and if / when you want to share that's your decision. You're under no obligation. Many people choose to keep it private.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Mar. 21, 2013 at 1:12 PM
That's how I felt. He made me feel like I had committed some horrible act by not telling him. He said I deprived him of the chance to grieve for his lost grandchild.....

Quoting Cmgmqmmom:

None of his business. It's an emotional thing and if / when you want to share that's your decision. You're under no obligation. Many people choose to keep it private.
Cmgmqmmom
by Sass Queen on Mar. 21, 2013 at 1:19 PM
I'm so sorry, both for your loss and the fact that he has made it more difficult.


Quoting Anonymous:

That's how I felt. He made me feel like I had committed some horrible act by not telling him. He said I deprived him of the chance to grieve for his lost grandchild.....



Quoting Cmgmqmmom:

None of his business. It's an emotional thing and if / when you want to share that's your decision. You're under no obligation. Many people choose to keep it private.

Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Mar. 21, 2013 at 1:23 PM
Thanks. I was just caught off guard, like really, I didn't know what happens in my uterus is the worlds business. Now dh is mad at his dad and I feel bad but I thought maybe we were wrong for not telling him? Idk this sucks and is just bringing everything back up again

Quoting Cmgmqmmom:

I'm so sorry, both for your loss and the fact that he has made it more difficult.




Quoting Anonymous:

That's how I felt. He made me feel like I had committed some horrible act by not telling him. He said I deprived him of the chance to grieve for his lost grandchild.....





Quoting Cmgmqmmom:

None of his business. It's an emotional thing and if / when you want to share that's your decision. You're under no obligation. Many people choose to keep it private.

Cmgmqmmom
by Sass Queen on Mar. 21, 2013 at 1:25 PM
As long as you have your husband's support, I wouldn't even give it another thought.


Quoting Anonymous:

Thanks. I was just caught off guard, like really, I didn't know what happens in my uterus is the worlds business. Now dh is mad at his dad and I feel bad but I thought maybe we were wrong for not telling him? Idk this sucks and is just bringing everything back up again



Quoting Cmgmqmmom:

I'm so sorry, both for your loss and the fact that he has made it more difficult.






Quoting Anonymous:

That's how I felt. He made me feel like I had committed some horrible act by not telling him. He said I deprived him of the chance to grieve for his lost grandchild.....







Quoting Cmgmqmmom:

None of his business. It's an emotional thing and if / when you want to share that's your decision. You're under no obligation. Many people choose to keep it private.


Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Mar. 21, 2013 at 1:34 PM
K thought maybe i was just a huge bitch or crazy or something!! Sorry for your loss!

Quoting crashblossom:

I didn't tell anybody about mine. It's absolutely nobody's business but your own, and DH/SO's if they're in the picture.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Mar. 21, 2013 at 1:55 PM
Bump...
ame85
by Chemistry cat on Mar. 21, 2013 at 1:58 PM
No. It's no one's business and his reaction was rude.
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