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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Just got back from court

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

My ex decided to take me to court to have his child support lowered because he and his wife can't stop popping out kids they can't afford. They have been married 7 years and they have 3 kids together and she is pregnant again.

He has asked me in the past to lower the child support. The first time, I agreed to lower it by $200 a month (he pays $485 a month for our one child) for a year because his wife was pregnant with their second and they were having a hard time. She wasn't going to be able to go back to work after she had the baby because after daycare for 2 kids, it wasn't going to be worth it (remember that her income has no bearing on child support anyway). About 2 months after that year was up, she got pregnant again this was their 3ird child together, and again,  my ex asked me to lower the child support. At that point I said no. It was one thing when she was pregnant with their second and he asked me but for it to happen again, sorry, they need to plan better.

So we were in court and the judge asked why he wanted the support lowered and my ex told him because he is about to have 5 children total. I told the judge about the year where I let him off $200 a month after their second child. The judge asked him  if he couldn't make his child support payments in full for a while after his 2and child with his wife, why would he go and have 2 more and then expect me to do with less child support because of it? He told the judge that if we were together and had more children, our first child would live on less. The judge agreed that was true but in that case, I would have say over having those children, in this case, obviously, I didn't. My ex went on to tell the judge that I was being greedy and that our DD has more then him and his wife's kids (yeah, because I work, my DH works and we have DD and 2 kids together because we stopped having children so that we could AFFORD all of them). While it was hard, I kept my mouth shut the whole time while he kept talking back to the judge and was clearly getting on his nerves

The judge reviewed the papers and saw that he is making $500 more, per month then he was when child support was ordered. So instead of ordering a decrease in child support, he ordered it to be increased by $130 per month so now it's ordered at $615.

I was thinking about letting my ex just pay the $485 but after the way he talked about me in court, I don't think I will. It also pisses me off that instead of saying "hey, let's stop having children" he says "hey, lets just try to pay less for my first child".


Posted by Anonymous on Mar. 22, 2013 at 12:00 PM
Replies (21-30):
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Mar. 22, 2013 at 12:18 PM

Nice, it's good when judges actually use some common sense. I have friends who have dealt with crazy things in court



Quoting embrigmom:

My ex took me to court to have support lowered a year or so ago. When the judge asked why he said it was because he had a diffrent job and the pay was lower. So he did get it lowered for that. After the judge told him the new amount that he would be paying he brought up the fact that he had another child and thought that it should be lower still because of that. The jude asked me if I was the mother of that child and I told him no. My ex was then told that no his second child doesn' t effect the amount of money needed to take care of his first dd and that if he can't afford the childern he should stop having them, or stay with the mother so that he doesn't end up back in court paying childsupport for another child.



mommy_me
by ~The Three B's~ on Mar. 22, 2013 at 12:19 PM
Lol you chose to breed with him. Your choice not your kids his wife or their children.



Seems like the only ones truly suffering are his children. But good for you, got that money


Quoting Anonymous:

No, but my DD didn't ask to have a father who puts her last among his children. My DD is my responsibility, not his kids with his wife.





Quoting mommy_me:

Poor babies. They didn't ask to be born to such greedy people





Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Mar. 22, 2013 at 12:19 PM

I don't know why either but I think it's funny that she goes on about that yet she married a divorced man.



Quoting Anonymous:



Quoting Anonymous:

I know, she keeps saying "I'm Catholic, I can't use birth control" then don't have sex. Which I think is funny anyway because doesn't the Catholic church frown upon divorce?



Quoting nicolemead91:

hey at least ur child support went up.. what an ass tho. 

its not ur fault that they cant stop having children they cant afford..





I've never been able to understand why Catholics can't use birth control.  Yeah, or why the Catholic church won't support the extra kids.



bad_mama2011
by on Mar. 22, 2013 at 12:20 PM

HA HA HA HA! Justice.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Mar. 22, 2013 at 12:21 PM

I chose to have a child with a man (who BTW I was married to) who didn't have any  other children. His wife is the one who chose to have 4 children with a man who already has a child. His children are not my responsibility, they are their mom and their dad's responsibility. And yes, I got the money FOR MY CHILD.



Quoting mommy_me:

Lol you chose to breed with him. Your choice not your kids his wife or their children.

Seems like the only ones truly suffering are his children. But good for you, you that money


Quoting Anonymous:

No, but my DD didn't ask to have a father who puts her last among his children. My DD is my responsibility, not his kids with his wife.




Quoting mommy_me:

Poor babies. They didn't ask to be born to such greedy people






mommy_me
by ~The Three B's~ on Mar. 22, 2013 at 12:22 PM
Yep

Quoting Anonymous:

I chose to have a child with a man (who BTW I was married to) who didn't have any  other children. His wife is the one who chose to have 4 children with a man who already has a child. His children are not my responsibility, they are their mom and their dad's responsibility. And yes, I got the money FOR MY CHILD.




Quoting mommy_me:

Lol you chose to breed with him. Your choice not your kids his wife or their children.



Seems like the only ones truly suffering are his children. But good for you, you that money




Quoting Anonymous:

No, but my DD didn't ask to have a father who puts her last among his children. My DD is my responsibility, not his kids with his wife.





Quoting mommy_me:

Poor babies. They didn't ask to be born to such greedy people








Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Mar. 22, 2013 at 12:23 PM



Quoting Anonymous:

I don't know why either but I think it's funny that she goes on about that yet she married a divorced man.



Quoting Anonymous:



Quoting Anonymous:

I know, she keeps saying "I'm Catholic, I can't use birth control" then don't have sex. Which I think is funny anyway because doesn't the Catholic church frown upon divorce?



Quoting nicolemead91:

hey at least ur child support went up.. what an ass tho. 

its not ur fault that they cant stop having children they cant afford..





I've never been able to understand why Catholics can't use birth control.  Yeah, or why the Catholic church won't support the extra kids.




Yeah, sounds like they don't have it together.  confused

Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Mar. 22, 2013 at 12:23 PM
This made me laugh. Maybe next time he'll keep his mouth shut.
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Mar. 22, 2013 at 12:24 PM

I think that is just her excuse for having children they can't afford



Quoting Anonymous:



Quoting Anonymous:

I don't know why either but I think it's funny that she goes on about that yet she married a divorced man.



Quoting Anonymous:



Quoting Anonymous:

I know, she keeps saying "I'm Catholic, I can't use birth control" then don't have sex. Which I think is funny anyway because doesn't the Catholic church frown upon divorce?



Quoting nicolemead91:

hey at least ur child support went up.. what an ass tho. 

its not ur fault that they cant stop having children they cant afford..





I've never been able to understand why Catholics can't use birth control.  Yeah, or why the Catholic church won't support the extra kids.




Yeah, sounds like they don't have it together.  confused



Angelicembrace
by The Dorkfish on Mar. 22, 2013 at 12:27 PM

Hmm..I'm biased with this topic right now.

Anyways. I am glad that things went smoothly for you.

Whenever life gets tough I just remember this..

The Water Temple.


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