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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

stop calling my son names!

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
Yes, I yell at my son but I'm HIS MOM. HE KNOWS I LOVE HIM. You are NOT HIS DAD and he probably assumes you hate him! Especially when you say you can't "trust" him and call him a punk because even though he's been good with hitting for months, you throw it in his face like he's grown! I cannot take this! Take YOUR SON that I'm also a mom to, I'll take MY son and lets separate! I am not going to allow this behavior!
Posted by Anonymous on Mar. 22, 2013 at 3:38 PM
Replies (41-50):
marie2409
by Silver Member on Mar. 22, 2013 at 4:19 PM
Well that's no good. Hate to suggest counseling, I am not a big fan myself, but maybe would help? If could get him to go that is.

I have bio kids and full time step kids. Blending families can be super tough. It's harder than most are willing to admit.


Quoting Anonymous:

Not all his fault. Yea. Hostile at least. it gets bad and it's always him blowing up. I know how to communicate. He doesn't.



Quoting marie2409:

So it's all his fault? Not trying to bash or argue, just trying to understand. Do you and him communicate well otherwise? Are all disagreements hostile?





Quoting Anonymous:

I don't yell. He blows up. I talk calmly and he gets defensive and BOOM.







Quoting marie2409:

Have you tried actual grown up conversations? Not venting, not yelling. Sounds like you both have some anger issues, a lot of yelling and tension in your house I imagine.









Quoting Anonymous:

Come be a fly on the wall here and soon you'll see what I'm talking about. I just "vented" to DH about thus and it didn't end well. Of course I want both my kids but I don't know what else to do.











Quoting blues_pagan:

The wording of your post is simply horrible.  Really, words here speak much louder than you may think.  and the words here just say crappy mother to me.  Instead of venting about it here why not confront the guy doing this to your son.  It is verbal abuse and it seems you just let it happen.

And sorry, if he is verbally abusing one son what is going to stop him from doing it to the other when he steps our of line.  

Once again, you sound like a poor mother.

Quoting Anonymous:

DH is the one telling my 5yo he can't trust him.













They are both my sons and I love them equally.













The one who needs protecting needs me more. Youngest son is never treated poorly. I'm here every day. I know.













Quoting blues_pagan:

Actually yelling at your son isn't going to help him with trust.  If he can't trust you to stay level and keep a level tone then how can he trust anyone else?  

And the simple fact that you have a "your" son (who you are a mother to) and a "my" son simply shows that you are not a good mother.


Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Mar. 22, 2013 at 4:21 PM
He refuses counseling. The man has issues. Big ones. He is angry so easily... seemingly by the sound of his voice. He said today that my son and I are ganging up on him.

Quoting marie2409:

Well that's no good. Hate to suggest counseling, I am not a big fan myself, but maybe would help? If could get him to go that is.



I have bio kids and full time step kids. Blending families can be super tough. It's harder than most are willing to admit.




Quoting Anonymous:

Not all his fault. Yea. Hostile at least. it gets bad and it's always him blowing up. I know how to communicate. He doesn't.





Quoting marie2409:

So it's all his fault? Not trying to bash or argue, just trying to understand. Do you and him communicate well otherwise? Are all disagreements hostile?







Quoting Anonymous:

I don't yell. He blows up. I talk calmly and he gets defensive and BOOM.









Quoting marie2409:

Have you tried actual grown up conversations? Not venting, not yelling. Sounds like you both have some anger issues, a lot of yelling and tension in your house I imagine.











Quoting Anonymous:

Come be a fly on the wall here and soon you'll see what I'm talking about. I just "vented" to DH about thus and it didn't end well. Of course I want both my kids but I don't know what else to do.













Quoting blues_pagan:

The wording of your post is simply horrible.  Really, words here speak much louder than you may think.  and the words here just say crappy mother to me.  Instead of venting about it here why not confront the guy doing this to your son.  It is verbal abuse and it seems you just let it happen.

And sorry, if he is verbally abusing one son what is going to stop him from doing it to the other when he steps our of line.  

Once again, you sound like a poor mother.

Quoting Anonymous:

DH is the one telling my 5yo he can't trust him.















They are both my sons and I love them equally.















The one who needs protecting needs me more. Youngest son is never treated poorly. I'm here every day. I know.















Quoting blues_pagan:

Actually yelling at your son isn't going to help him with trust.  If he can't trust you to stay level and keep a level tone then how can he trust anyone else?  

And the simple fact that you have a "your" son (who you are a mother to) and a "my" son simply shows that you are not a good mother.


blues_pagan
by on Mar. 22, 2013 at 4:22 PM

You need to be thinking about both of yours sons regardless which son you have a stronger bond with.

Like I said, if you can't work it out with your husband then you need to take both of your sons and leave.

Quoting Anonymous:

No I didn't and it would tear me apart because my bond with toddler is stronger. I just am lost.

Quoting blues_pagan:

You woman up and take them both.  Did you stop to think that your other son will wonder why you loved his brother more than him since you didn't take them both.

Quoting Anonymous:

Come be a fly on the wall here and soon you'll see what I'm talking about. I just "vented" to DH about thus and it didn't end well. Of course I want both my kids but I don't know what else to do.



Quoting blues_pagan:

The wording of your post is simply horrible.  Really, words here speak much louder than you may think.  and the words here just say crappy mother to me.  Instead of venting about it here why not confront the guy doing this to your son.  It is verbal abuse and it seems you just let it happen.

And sorry, if he is verbally abusing one son what is going to stop him from doing it to the other when he steps our of line.  

Once again, you sound like a poor mother.

Quoting Anonymous:

DH is the one telling my 5yo he can't trust him.





They are both my sons and I love them equally.





The one who needs protecting needs me more. Youngest son is never treated poorly. I'm here every day. I know.





Quoting blues_pagan:

Actually yelling at your son isn't going to help him with trust.  If he can't trust you to stay level and keep a level tone then how can he trust anyone else?  

And the simple fact that you have a "your" son (who you are a mother to) and a "my" son simply shows that you are not a good mother.




jessi2girls
by Ruby Member on Mar. 22, 2013 at 4:24 PM

Sounds like you both are up for playing games and the childrens' expense SMH

URHonor
by Rotten.Girl on Mar. 22, 2013 at 4:25 PM

wait...what?

marie2409
by Silver Member on Mar. 22, 2013 at 4:25 PM
That's not a good situation for anyone. I hope you are able to leave with both of your kids. Would hate for the one to grow up not knowing how to handle his anger because his main role model sucked at it so bad. I wish you luck!!

Quoting Anonymous:

He refuses counseling. The man has issues. Big ones. He is angry so easily... seemingly by the sound of his voice. He said today that my son and I are ganging up on him.



Quoting marie2409:

Well that's no good. Hate to suggest counseling, I am not a big fan myself, but maybe would help? If could get him to go that is.





I have bio kids and full time step kids. Blending families can be super tough. It's harder than most are willing to admit.






Quoting Anonymous:

Not all his fault. Yea. Hostile at least. it gets bad and it's always him blowing up. I know how to communicate. He doesn't.







Quoting marie2409:

So it's all his fault? Not trying to bash or argue, just trying to understand. Do you and him communicate well otherwise? Are all disagreements hostile?









Quoting Anonymous:

I don't yell. He blows up. I talk calmly and he gets defensive and BOOM.











Quoting marie2409:

Have you tried actual grown up conversations? Not venting, not yelling. Sounds like you both have some anger issues, a lot of yelling and tension in your house I imagine.













Quoting Anonymous:

Come be a fly on the wall here and soon you'll see what I'm talking about. I just "vented" to DH about thus and it didn't end well. Of course I want both my kids but I don't know what else to do.















Quoting blues_pagan:

The wording of your post is simply horrible.  Really, words here speak much louder than you may think.  and the words here just say crappy mother to me.  Instead of venting about it here why not confront the guy doing this to your son.  It is verbal abuse and it seems you just let it happen.

And sorry, if he is verbally abusing one son what is going to stop him from doing it to the other when he steps our of line.  

Once again, you sound like a poor mother.

Quoting Anonymous:

DH is the one telling my 5yo he can't trust him.

















They are both my sons and I love them equally.

















The one who needs protecting needs me more. Youngest son is never treated poorly. I'm here every day. I know.

















Quoting blues_pagan:

Actually yelling at your son isn't going to help him with trust.  If he can't trust you to stay level and keep a level tone then how can he trust anyone else?  

And the simple fact that you have a "your" son (who you are a mother to) and a "my" son simply shows that you are not a good mother.


Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Aleta775
by on Mar. 22, 2013 at 4:28 PM
You can go to family counseling on your own. Even if he doesn't want to go it will look good for you in court that you were working to find an answer. The fact that he refuses to go will only look bad for him. It will be a plus in your corner, AND you might be able to help your oldest son a little bit in the process. It is worth a shot.

Quoting Anonymous:

He refuses counseling. The man has issues. Big ones. He is angry so easily... seemingly by the sound of his voice. He said today that my son and I are ganging up on him.



Quoting marie2409:

Well that's no good. Hate to suggest counseling, I am not a big fan myself, but maybe would help? If could get him to go that is.





I have bio kids and full time step kids. Blending families can be super tough. It's harder than most are willing to admit.






Quoting Anonymous:

Not all his fault. Yea. Hostile at least. it gets bad and it's always him blowing up. I know how to communicate. He doesn't.







Quoting marie2409:

So it's all his fault? Not trying to bash or argue, just trying to understand. Do you and him communicate well otherwise? Are all disagreements hostile?









Quoting Anonymous:

I don't yell. He blows up. I talk calmly and he gets defensive and BOOM.











Quoting marie2409:

Have you tried actual grown up conversations? Not venting, not yelling. Sounds like you both have some anger issues, a lot of yelling and tension in your house I imagine.













Quoting Anonymous:

Come be a fly on the wall here and soon you'll see what I'm talking about. I just "vented" to DH about thus and it didn't end well. Of course I want both my kids but I don't know what else to do.















Quoting blues_pagan:

The wording of your post is simply horrible.  Really, words here speak much louder than you may think.  and the words here just say crappy mother to me.  Instead of venting about it here why not confront the guy doing this to your son.  It is verbal abuse and it seems you just let it happen.

And sorry, if he is verbally abusing one son what is going to stop him from doing it to the other when he steps our of line.  

Once again, you sound like a poor mother.

Quoting Anonymous:

DH is the one telling my 5yo he can't trust him.

















They are both my sons and I love them equally.

















The one who needs protecting needs me more. Youngest son is never treated poorly. I'm here every day. I know.

















Quoting blues_pagan:

Actually yelling at your son isn't going to help him with trust.  If he can't trust you to stay level and keep a level tone then how can he trust anyone else?  

And the simple fact that you have a "your" son (who you are a mother to) and a "my" son simply shows that you are not a good mother.


Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
TheDoctorsWife
by on Mar. 22, 2013 at 4:28 PM

 That's messed up

 

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Mar. 22, 2013 at 4:29 PM

I find it interesting that you seem to believe that your  youngest son is safe simply because he's the favorite child. Once you and your oldest son leave, guess who will be the only target of your husbands emotional instability? Yeah, this is how tragic front page stories are made folks. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Mar. 22, 2013 at 4:29 PM
This is disgusting, no real mother is willing to leave one child behind. Wtf is wrong with you?

My dhs ex wife actually said in court that we could have the 3 boys, but she wanted to keep the girl. The judge laughed at her, said you dont split siblings or get to pick your favorite. We have full custody of all 4, she has supervised visitation. This will not go well for you in court, and think of the damage you are doing to your youngest if you leave him behind.
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