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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Is he being irresponsible or is it just me?

Posted by on Mar. 29, 2013 at 11:55 AM
  • 41 Replies


I posted this in 20 something moms as well. I'm posting here too so I can get as many opinions as possible.

My SO and I have our first on the way. She is due in May. I've been worried about him being able to handle everything involved with caring for a baby. I work at a daycare and take care of 4 infants at one time, so I know all the ins and outs. He has never been around babies and I know there is going to be a learning curve for him obviously. But I just feel like he isn't responsible enough for me to even trust her alone with the baby. Growing up, his mom babied him. She did pretty much everything for him. Well I've noticed just how much he doesn't do when we moved in together. He NEVER locks the door to the house. We even had people breaking in to near-by houses and still, he continued to forget to lock the door. He also won't lock the car doors either. I can literally say RIGHT before we get out "Lock the door", and he doesn't!! Also, sometimes when he is done cooking, he leaves the stove on!!!!! One night, he left the stove on ALL night because I didn't know I had to check it. Then, he is obsessed with this online PC game called Guild Wars. He will stay up until 5 or 6am playing this goddamn game even on nights when he has work or school the follow day. So he goes off of like 4-5 hours of sleep. And he puts his game before his studies as well. He just bombed a Math exam for college because he didn't study the night before. He gamed -.- Lastly, I have to do little things for him like remember to get his wallet and cell phone before he leaves, set the alarm clock or he won't, REMIND him he hasn't showered in two days. Ugh..I just feel like I have a child already. How am I suppose to trust him if I need to go some where? I feel like he won't remember to feed her or change her diaper or burp her. Do I have legitamite reason to be worried or do you think I'm being a bitch and over-reacting??

by on Mar. 29, 2013 at 11:55 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Mar. 29, 2013 at 11:57 AM
1 mom liked this

I think you have a legitimate reason to be concerned. But I think you're too late to decide to be concerned about it. He's your baby's father so you will have to take the burden of the responsibility. 

mommy_me
by ~The Three B's~ on Mar. 29, 2013 at 11:58 AM
1 mom liked this
I'm sorry I couldn't get past the I don't trust him to be responsible enough with her by himself.

please explain to me that's how you really feel then why the hell did you get pregnant in the first place
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coffeemom37043
by Silver Member on Mar. 29, 2013 at 11:59 AM


It's called an accident. She was unplanned.

Quoting mommy_me:

I'm sorry I couldn't get past the I don't trust him to be responsible enough with her by himself.

please explain to me that's how you really feel then why the hell did you get pregnant in the first place



Jade_Lufercus
by on Mar. 29, 2013 at 12:01 PM
1 mom liked this

And I thought my husband was bad! Holy crap. I'd stop doing anything for him. Obviously still check the stove, because we don't need your house to burn down, but simple things like cleaning up after him, whatever. Maybe a few weeks of him not having clean clothes, getting looked at funny for stinking, and missing school will make him wake up and smell the coffee.

mommy_me
by ~The Three B's~ on Mar. 29, 2013 at 12:01 PM
Im really sorry for your position. I cannot imagine having a baby with somebody that I don't trust to take care of them and then continue to be with that person.
good luck to you and I hope that everything works out


Quoting coffeemom37043:


It's called an accident. She was unplanned.


Quoting mommy_me:

I'm sorry I couldn't get past the I don't trust him to be responsible enough with her by himself.



please explain to me that's how you really feel then why the hell did you get pregnant in the first place




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Anonymous
by Anonymous on Mar. 29, 2013 at 12:02 PM
Uh. He needs some help. Like a slap in the face. Personally I would wait until the babys born to see if that will make a change in him.
Mommynwife26
by Gold Member on Mar. 29, 2013 at 12:02 PM

How old is he? I would be concerned but I would give him a chance. There are men who change when a child is born. Just help him out, maybe write things and post them to help remind him what needs to be done like how to clean the bottles (if you use them) or what needs to be done during diaper change (ie wipe, diaper rash cream if needed) that kind of stuff.

coffeemom37043
by Silver Member on Mar. 29, 2013 at 12:03 PM


Thank you

Quoting mommy_me:

Im really sorry for your position. I cannot imagine having a baby with somebody that I don't trust to take care of them and then continue to be with that person.
good luck to you and I hope that everything works out


Quoting coffeemom37043:


It's called an accident. She was unplanned.


Quoting mommy_me:

I'm sorry I couldn't get past the I don't trust him to be responsible enough with her by himself.



please explain to me that's how you really feel then why the hell did you get pregnant in the first place






sugareemommee
by Platinum Member on Mar. 29, 2013 at 12:03 PM
I'm sorry he's a child. He needs to get his shit together, for real.

Have you sat down and had an adult conversation about this with him?
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PinkButterfly66
by Ruby Member on Mar. 29, 2013 at 12:03 PM

Wow, you picked a winner to breed with. I would have cut my losses BEFORE I got pregnant.  Good luck hon, cause you're going to need it.  I hope your man-child eventually grows up.

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