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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Why all the advice on how to not hear your baby cry?

I have seen several 'sleep training' posts on facebook from mothers who are struggling.....and people reply "hang in there" --- "ear plugs" --- "ipod headphones" --- "you will all appreciate it in a few days!"

Do people NOT know that babies cry for a reason?!?  (reasons aren't always about being hungry, soiled, or hot/cold --- babies actually have emotional and psychological needs, too!)

People tell you it's 'for the baby's own good"  --- b/c, you know, a 6 month old needs to learn to be 'independent' and to 'self-soothe' or he/she will never, ever, sleep on his/her own!!!  *eye roll*  (and, HOW do you define 'self-soothe'?  A baby finally stopping crying doesn't mean he/she has learned to 'self-soothe'......didn't you know crying is EXHAUSTING?!?)

Learned helplessness is not self-soothing.  Sleep training is learned helplessness.  Sugar coat it however you want to make yourself feel better.  Tell yourself how happy you were you did it.....but, your baby just learned that mom won't come anymore when I need her --- that is NOT 'self-soothing'.    

Babies who never 'sleep trained', or went through 'cry it out', are actually capable of being independent and to go to sleep on their own when they are ready.

Vent over.


by on Mar. 30, 2013 at 12:10 AM
Replies (31-40):
twin_mama_x_2
by Silver Member on Mar. 30, 2013 at 1:51 AM
One of my 1st set of twins(peyton) had severe gerd(which to led to sandifers syndrome) & he also had laryngomalacia to the point where he actually had feeding aversion & would only dream feed for me-meaning for 15 months i woke up every 2 to 3 hours at night to give him bottles & when he was about 2 weeks old,he began screaming nonstop & no lie,it could go on for 12 hours because the child would NOT sleep or eat.plus i had another baby to care for-his twin Elijah who thank god was gerd/sandifers/laryngomalacia free.the gi said he felt the laryngomalacia is what set the stage for the gerd being as severe as it was & he saw a speech language pathologist until 15 months old for feeding therapy..I feel
You pain mama!happy to say though at age 3,you'd never know he had any issues at all.


Quoting banana-bear:Clearly you have never had a baby with GERD. There was no amount of love, attention, diaper changes, feedings, etc that I could have done. She just cried for hours on end. I tended to her excessively and I wish I would have thought to wear headphones with music back then. I was going insane.
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anonymous12308
by Platinum Member on Mar. 30, 2013 at 1:59 AM
With my first it was hard he had horrible colic and would scream for hours on end I hot a hr of sleep a night if I was lucky for months needless to say I went nuts.
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banana-bear
by on Mar. 30, 2013 at 4:38 AM
I'm sorry you dealt with that! But so happy to hear that he's doing fine now :o) My GERD baby is 4 now and she still shows some reflux symptoms but it's not really that bad...... not like when she was a baby.

Quoting twin_mama_x_2:

One of my 1st set of twins(peyton) had severe gerd(which to led to sandifers syndrome) & he also had laryngomalacia to the point where he actually had feeding aversion & would only dream feed for me-meaning for 15 months i woke up every 2 to 3 hours at night to give him bottles & when he was about 2 weeks old,he began screaming nonstop & no lie,it could go on for 12 hours because the child would NOT sleep or eat.plus i had another baby to care for-his twin Elijah who thank god was gerd/sandifers/laryngomalacia free.the gi said he felt the laryngomalacia is what set the stage for the gerd being as severe as it was & he saw a speech language pathologist until 15 months old for feeding therapy..I feel

You pain mama!happy to say though at age 3,you'd never know he had any issues at all.





Quoting banana-bear:Clearly you have never had a baby with GERD. There was no amount of love, attention, diaper changes, feedings, etc that I could have done. She just cried for hours on end. I tended to her excessively and I wish I would have thought to wear headphones with music back then. I was going insane.
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mattiehatter
by Mary on Mar. 30, 2013 at 4:41 AM

I can understand moms dealing with a colicky baby needing some kind of temporary relief while they are trying to soothe their baby, but to tune the child out entirely I don't understand.

20Keller12
by Gold Member on Mar. 30, 2013 at 4:43 AM
Agreed. I could never do CIO cause what if one tine you think baby needs to "self soothe" and is actually very sick or needs something?
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saralovely129
by on Mar. 30, 2013 at 4:43 AM

Agree. But when my kids have a spoiled moment it's my fault for all the times I ran to their rescue and took a few minutes out of my day to soothe them... -_____-

crumpy_gat
by No. on Mar. 30, 2013 at 4:44 AM

Yep, or colic. 

Quoting banana-bear:

Clearly you have never had a baby with GERD. There was no amount of love, attention, diaper changes, feedings, etc that I could have done. She just cried for hours on end. I tended to her excessively and I wish I would have thought to wear headphones with music back then. I was going insane.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Mar. 30, 2013 at 4:49 AM
I've never heard if GERD before. Enlighten me?


Quoting twin_mama_x_2:

One of my 1st set of twins(peyton) had severe gerd(which to led to sandifers syndrome) & he also had laryngomalacia to the point where he actually had feeding aversion & would only dream feed for me-meaning for 15 months i woke up every 2 to 3 hours at night to give him bottles & when he was about 2 weeks old,he began screaming nonstop & no lie,it could go on for 12 hours because the child would NOT sleep or eat.plus i had another baby to care for-his twin Elijah who thank god was gerd/sandifers/laryngomalacia free.the gi said he felt the laryngomalacia is what set the stage for the gerd being as severe as it was & he saw a speech language pathologist until 15 months old for feeding therapy..I feel

You pain mama!happy to say though at age 3,you'd never know he had any issues at all.





Quoting banana-bear:Clearly you have never had a baby with GERD. There was no amount of love, attention, diaper changes, feedings, etc that I could have done. She just cried for hours on end. I tended to her excessively and I wish I would have thought to wear headphones with music back then. I was going insane.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Mar. 30, 2013 at 4:52 AM

And you are an expert, why?

twin_mama_x_2
by Silver Member on Mar. 30, 2013 at 7:50 AM
Gerd if gastroesophageal reflux disease & can be quite nasty in an infant.my son had silent gerd-meaning it came up & went back down,in effect,burning his esophagus twice.


Quoting Anonymous:

I've never heard if GERD before. Enlighten me?




Quoting twin_mama_x_2:

One of my 1st set of twins(peyton) had severe gerd(which to led to sandifers syndrome) & he also had laryngomalacia to the point where he actually had feeding aversion & would only dream feed for me-meaning for 15 months i woke up every 2 to 3 hours at night to give him bottles & when he was about 2 weeks old,he began screaming nonstop & no lie,it could go on for 12 hours because the child would NOT sleep or eat.plus i had another baby to care for-his twin Elijah who thank god was gerd/sandifers/laryngomalacia free.the gi said he felt the laryngomalacia is what set the stage for the gerd being as severe as it was & he saw a speech language pathologist until 15 months old for feeding therapy..I feel


You pain mama!happy to say though at age 3,you'd never know he had any issues at all.








Quoting banana-bear:Clearly you have never had a baby with GERD. There was no amount of love, attention, diaper changes, feedings, etc that I could have done. She just cried for hours on end. I tended to her excessively and I wish I would have thought to wear headphones with music back then. I was going insane.


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