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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

It keeps me up at night.

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A lot of fucking anger, and a lot of hurt and some regret.


All of them on deep levels that I really need to deal with in time but right now I have so much HATE in my heart that I can't let go of. It eats at me and I really don't know how to let go. 90% of it is directed at one person. He's ruined me in so many ways.


So here I am. Another sleepless freaking night. I have everything that SHOULD make me happy. But I'm so fucking angry.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on Apr. 3, 2013 at 3:12 AM
Replies (41-50):
Ninjascreenname
by Gold Member on Apr. 3, 2013 at 3:26 AM
1 mom liked this
If you really wanna stop it then do these things. Block that person. Every way they can contact you. Black hole everything anyone says to you about that person- they no longer exist. Make yourself move on.


Quoting 504bbymami:

I have no idea how to stop it..




Quoting Anonymous:

You allow if to keep you up





You allow this person to have such a control over you








Why allow someone to take up so much space in your head?





You are what's holding you back from Being a happy productive person


Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
banana-bear
by on Apr. 3, 2013 at 3:26 AM
1 mom liked this
I was just teasing ;o)

Quoting mattiehatter:

 

Lol. Maybe, but it's the truth for me. It was therapeutic to burn pictures of the people that hurt me.


Quoting banana-bear:

Well that escalated quickly....



Quoting mattiehatter:

Burn pictures of the person. Feels pretty damn good.




Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Apr. 3, 2013 at 3:27 AM
2 moms liked this
Actually journaling is really a huge tool I use to come on cafemom and talk about all my problems. Now two yrs later I kinda browse under anon. I have a read a few things about you having a mental break down. Sounds silly but I would try with the library. For about six months. Just checking books about anger the brain. Amygalda. I have done this. And OMg It really helps. I don't keep a diary. I write on paper and throw it away. Your mind is a powerful thing. It's like there is u and a roommate. The struggle is to integrate the two. Regret is like a teadmill going nowhere. You need to create a visual of what you want in five years and work backwards. Good luck


Quoting 504bbymami:

I need interaction. Being in my own head makes everything much much worse.




Quoting blue.chairs:

Go write in your diary.


mattiehatter
by Mary on Apr. 3, 2013 at 3:27 AM
1 mom liked this

I knew, but I thought I would explain a bit further.


Quoting banana-bear:

I was just teasing ;o)

Quoting mattiehatter:


Lol. Maybe, but it's the truth for me. It was therapeutic to burn pictures of the people that hurt me.


Quoting banana-bear:

Well that escalated quickly....



Quoting mattiehatter:

Burn pictures of the person. Feels pretty damn good.






504bbymami
by Sapphire Member on Apr. 3, 2013 at 3:27 AM
He's used me and I put so much into him for absolutely nothing in return. Now because of him, pretty much every relationship that's been important to me is ruined and the one I have left is strained.


Quoting blue.chairs:

Ok. So then what are some of the ways he "ruined" you?




Quoting 504bbymami:

I need interaction. Being in my own head makes everything much much worse.






Quoting blue.chairs:

Go write in your diary.



Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Ninjascreenname
by Gold Member on Apr. 3, 2013 at 3:28 AM
I do. And it's my freaking antidepressant. I SHOULD remember to take it- the whole no energy thing should be a damn constant reminder, but I still don't take it. It's in the freaking van, in my purse, safe in its own little bottle.



Quoting banana-bear:

:o(



You SO do not suck at life! Try setting an alarm for the meds.




Quoting Ninjascreenname:

I'm up because I suck at life and can't remember to take my medication. :(

Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
504bbymami
by Sapphire Member on Apr. 3, 2013 at 3:31 AM
I have done that. :/ cut off all contact months ago. Had a couple slip ups that weren't my fault.

Deleted all social media and one of the main reasons was to get away from him.

Now I have even cut off all my friends who are friends with him (which is all my best friends irl) to get away from him.

But it's still fucking killing me and now I'm just isolated.


Quoting Ninjascreenname:

If you really wanna stop it then do these things. Block that person. Every way they can contact you. Black hole everything anyone says to you about that person- they no longer exist. Make yourself move on.




Quoting 504bbymami:

I have no idea how to stop it..






Quoting Anonymous:

You allow if to keep you up







You allow this person to have such a control over you











Why allow someone to take up so much space in your head?







You are what's holding you back from Being a happy productive person



Posted on CafeMom Mobile
banana-bear
by on Apr. 3, 2013 at 3:31 AM
Maybe put it by your toothbrush that way you will be reminded every time you brush (and depending on the time of day you need to take the meds).

Quoting Ninjascreenname:

I do. And it's my freaking antidepressant. I SHOULD remember to take it- the whole no energy thing should be a damn constant reminder, but I still don't take it. It's in the freaking van, in my purse, safe in its own little bottle.






Quoting banana-bear:

:o(





You SO do not suck at life! Try setting an alarm for the meds.






Quoting Ninjascreenname:

I'm up because I suck at life and can't remember to take my medication. :(

Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Ninjascreenname
by Gold Member on Apr. 3, 2013 at 3:32 AM
1 mom liked this
Ill do that! That's seriously genius!


Quoting banana-bear:

Maybe put it by your toothbrush that way you will be reminded every time you brush (and depending on the time of day you need to take the meds).



Quoting Ninjascreenname:

I do. And it's my freaking antidepressant. I SHOULD remember to take it- the whole no energy thing should be a damn constant reminder, but I still don't take it. It's in the freaking van, in my purse, safe in its own little bottle.









Quoting banana-bear:

:o(







You SO do not suck at life! Try setting an alarm for the meds.








Quoting Ninjascreenname:

I'm up because I suck at life and can't remember to take my medication. :(


Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Ninjascreenname
by Gold Member on Apr. 3, 2013 at 3:33 AM
Ill talk over pm- and not send it to the blog- if you need to. I've BTDT.


Quoting 504bbymami:

I have done that. :/ cut off all contact months ago. Had a couple slip ups that weren't my fault.



Deleted all social media and one of the main reasons was to get away from him.



Now I have even cut off all my friends who are friends with him (which is all my best friends irl) to get away from him.



But it's still fucking killing me and now I'm just isolated.




Quoting Ninjascreenname:

If you really wanna stop it then do these things. Block that person. Every way they can contact you. Black hole everything anyone says to you about that person- they no longer exist. Make yourself move on.






Quoting 504bbymami:

I have no idea how to stop it..








Quoting Anonymous:

You allow if to keep you up









You allow this person to have such a control over you














Why allow someone to take up so much space in your head?









You are what's holding you back from Being a happy productive person




Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
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