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How common is this? Mommy Friend Problems:

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My youngest daughter is extremely social. She was one of those kids in school who knew just about everyone. She never had a single issue making friends. Now that she is married and has kids of her own, though, she is having trouble finding peers. She goes to college, but the kids at her college all seem to live with their parents and when she interacts with them, they only invite her to go clubbing with them. 

Other young ladies her age (20 years) with children still live with their parents and don't have a lot in common with her. In fact a few girls at the college actually told her it was 'weird' that she is married to the father of her kids and that he is the father of both of them (she steered clear of those girls). She wants to find other mothers who are married and are around her age. 

I suggested church, but her church was full of older people. I suggested playgroups, but she said there weren't any in our large metropolitan area. I googled it to find out and she was telling the truth. There were playgroups for dogs in our area, and playgroups for Italian kids and Portuguese kids, but those were the only three that were in our city. 

Her neighborhood is an older community, full of retired people or the parents of teens. 

At a loss, I suggested the local library.

What do you young women do to befriend other parents?

My poor daughter is so miserable without having friends with the same interests as herself.

by on Apr. 3, 2013 at 3:04 PM
Replies (61-67):
by on Jun. 18, 2013 at 5:02 PM

There are lots of meetup mom sites. The library always has activities going on for kids. I am not sure how all the girls she goes to school with happened to all live with their parents. I know many people from my school that have kids and are not living at home and or if they do they dont go out and party all the time. 

I go to school and I have friends, not all of them have kids but there are some that have kids that are my age and or my kids ages. I also have lots of play grounds around where I live. I am involved with various activities through my kids school. I also have friends from where I live when I chit chat with them when my kids are at the neighborhood playground too. Or friends from HS I am still friends with. Friends from work. 

She doesnt have to have all friends with kids, I have friends that do not have kids but we go out shopping or for coffee when my kids are in school. My SO has watched the kids when one of my friends want to go out for a quick coffee and girl talk. Why cant her husband watch the kids for a few hours once in a while so she can go out?

I'm a tattooed, free spirited, CIO, circumcision, delayed vax, pro-life, anti flu shot, hiking, beach bum, early potty training, snuggling, video gaming, art therapy, natural remedies, natural health, Jesus is my home boy, Artist, sarcastic mom!

by Sapphire Member on Jun. 18, 2013 at 5:06 PM

im in the same boat.....i have no friends anymore either

by Ruby Member on Jun. 18, 2013 at 5:09 PM

When I got married (19 years ago, lol) I was like your daughter.  A wife and a mom, in that order, with an intact and whole family unit.  We had to move a few times due to dh's job.  In some places, I was on my own as there weren't any wives my age.  In other places, there were families like ours and I was able to make friends. 
I guess the advice I would give her is that she may have to be open to friendships with ladies who are at least a bit older than she is.  Surely she can meet some wives who are in their late 20s?  Even early 30s?  If I meet someone in life who is on a similar life path as me and who has similar values, I don't care if they are younger or older than I am.  Surely others wouldn't shun her friendship because she is younger than they are when their lifestyles are similar.

by Anonymous 9 on Jun. 18, 2013 at 5:10 PM

I know I am not a 20 something anymore but when I was I was in my 20's I found it hard to find friends.  I ended up befriending a lady that was 20 years my senior at the time.  I am now 43 and we are still really good friends. 

I have another good friend that just turned 60 years old this past month.  I have more in common with people that are older than me.  Why I do not know.  

by Emerald Member on Jun. 18, 2013 at 5:12 PM

Have her check out  She can find meet up groups based on interest or meet up groups based on being a mommy.  

by on Jun. 18, 2013 at 5:12 PM

I have no friends for similar reasons. 

by Anonymous 10 on Jun. 18, 2013 at 5:13 PM

Go to google and type in "macaroni kid (her city's name)". On that website is a bunch of activities for kids to do, and a calendar. Usually libraries have kid stuff, so check the local libraries website. Did you try for playgroups, or even on here? My town is small but there's a group on here for it, though no one's ever wanted to meet :/

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