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done it all! at my wits end!

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 11 Replies
Ds 7 is acting up at school. Not listening, not doing the work, fighting, spitting, kicking the walls, rolling on the floor, etc. he does not act like this at home it anywhere else! Just at school.

I asked if he was being picked on, he said no. He says he tries, but its hard to do the work. He's going tomorrow for an adhd assessment... Friday for an audiology appointment. I asked him if the work was too hard, he says a little... But at home, he can do it just fine.

I've whooped him, took away his toys, TV time, video games. Took away his outside play. I've made him do the work he didn't do at school at home, plus extra. He missed out on weekend events because his behavior at school.

I've rewarded him. Every good day, he gets to do something, gets to stay up later, watch TV, play games, etc. on the weekends, he goes to the movies, arcade, ice skating... He gets new Lego sets, etc. even if he was bad part of the day, if he got one good remark, I'd reward him for that!

Idk what else to do. My ex (who helped parent him) and others say I need to spank him with a belt until he cries 'so he doesn't forget'... I don't want to do that. Spanking him once was bad enough for me. I cried before and after. Didn't seem to really phase him.

He knows what he's supposed to do! I've talked to the counselor, getting him into a divorce group at his school.

What can I do?

This is also new behavior. Started in December, around the break up. But me and my ex are on great terms, ds sees that. We never involve him in our problems (we don't really have any problems)
Posted by Anonymous on Apr. 3, 2013 at 6:34 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 3, 2013 at 6:43 PM
Bump
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 3, 2013 at 7:01 PM
Bump
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 3, 2013 at 7:08 PM
Bump
edelweiss23
by on Apr. 3, 2013 at 7:10 PM
Take him to a children's counselor.
He is upset because of the break up and is acting out.

Help him find ways to channel his frustration, punching bad, karate lessons , etc.
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poeticrose09
by Gold Member on Apr. 3, 2013 at 7:11 PM
I have no idea here's a bump for you my brother was the same way at that age and finally out grew it in his teens. Now.he is an awesome 17 yr old. But one day he was arrested at school and that seemed to.help for awhile.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Apr. 3, 2013 at 7:13 PM

He's acting out. I would suggest some therapy.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 3, 2013 at 7:14 PM
He started karate two weeks ago. That brought on the kicking. He's talking to the school counselor... And he doesn't act up at home. I'd think he'd act up anywhere ya know

Quoting edelweiss23:

Take him to a children's counselor.

He is upset because of the break up and is acting out.



Help him find ways to channel his frustration, punching bad, karate lessons , etc.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 3, 2013 at 7:16 PM
Lol I can't deal with it until he hits his teenage years! I could deal if he was acting up at home... But not at school

Quoting poeticrose09:

I have no idea here's a bump for you my brother was the same way at that age and finally out grew it in his teens. Now.he is an awesome 17 yr old. But one day he was arrested at school and that seemed to.help for awhile.
edelweiss23
by on Apr. 3, 2013 at 7:16 PM
Try counseling.
Get him to open up about his feelings about you and his dad breaking up


Quoting Anonymous:

He started karate two weeks ago. That brought on the kicking. He's talking to the school counselor... And he doesn't act up at home. I'd think he'd act up anywhere ya know



Quoting edelweiss23:

Take him to a children's counselor.


He is upset because of the break up and is acting out.





Help him find ways to channel his frustration, punching bad, karate lessons , etc.

Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
hismommy2010
by on Apr. 3, 2013 at 7:24 PM

 First I want to say - I agree with not spanking.

I would think it does have to do with the breakup. Even though you don't let him see anything going on between the two of you. Divorce/breakups are rough on kids. They go through stages just like adults do.

Maybe try to talk to him about it, with you and the father together. On a level that he can understand. hang in there, this has made his little world crumble in a way that he didn't know was possible. Just give him more love and reassure him that you both love him.

 

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