Today I wish I would have never talked to their father, never married him or had sex with him. But I dont wanna take back my dds. I have no friends only tv/video game playing hubby. Today hes called me a b. I dont want to be here, i want a home away from him, but have no means to provide care for the children. So naturally he would get to keep them. Which makes me scream inside to think of my babys without their mother.
Im over saddened that im even considering going through with it, im unhappy, and stressed all the time, its not healthy, and i dont know what else to do.
I would love a friend to talk to but I dont have one. I love being a stay at home mom, just am tired of no respect from my husband. I believe half of the reason if not more of the reason he doesnt respect me is because i dont bring anything into the home. Things were great before dd1 was born and i was working part time. But they are not great now.
Only times he pays attention to me is when im cooking because he wants to know what im fixing. Or when he wants sex. Its just sad i am ignored the remainder along with the kids. His routine is have allarm on for an hour before getting up so it wakes me up and dd2. Then complain about me being in the kitchen when hes getting ready for work, then leave for work. Get home at 4 pm and sit on couch only moving to get up to pee, or grab dinner plate and sit back at the tv. Mean while i give the kids chores which arent done because dad calls em to watch tv, saying it can be done later. Then he bitches when i yell to get the kids todo their chores.
The weekends are him staring at the tv playing video games alone, while everyone else sits and watches, and i do house work. I ask for help i get okay one minute, and no help. He says im over reacting they are just moving slow, really still playing video games, and im still cleaning.