You expect a 4 yr old to pay for her dad's funeral?
My fiance died unexpectedly several months ago. He had a back injury and had to have surgery. 9 hours after the surgery ( while still in the hospital) he had a heart attack and died. We have a 4 yr. old child together. Obviously we are devastated and it has been a real struggle in every way. His wish was to be cremated, we had talked about this several times in the past. When he died and arrangements were being discussed his grandmother called me a liar when I expressed his desire of cremation. She said it was not going to happen and he would have never wanted that. I told her I didn't have the money for a burial and this was what he wanted. She said she would pay for it herself before that happened, she's not rich per say but she's well off. A few hours later she called me and said she made an appt at the funeral home. She made all the arrangements. I asked to be included and was allowed to be there but I had no say so in any of it. Now she's complaining about the money she spent. She's asked me for money a coupe of times. Her daughter has called and asked me for money. Most recently her granddaughter asked me for money. I have 3 children that I am solely responsible for. I don't make alot of money and like most people, I have a mortgage, car payment, utilities, insurance etc etc...Our daughter received a small settlement because his injury was work related and they all feel like I need to give that to the grandmother. He doesn't even have a grave marker (headstone) and I am trying to get one b/c it bothers me that his grave is unmarked. That is a couple of thousand dollars that I will pay on my own. The aunt said that should not be my priority, my priority should be paying her mom back. Essentially they are asking my 4 yr old to pay for her dad's funeral and I dont think thats right. I want our daughter to have a relationship with his family so I am trying really hard to be nice but they are stressing me out!! Do you think they are right?? And thank you for listening, I have no one to talk to about this.