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Once a cheater...

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 61 Replies
Why women/men who have cheated before say that "once a cheater always a cheater" phrase when judging others? Is this the way you see yourself?

For those that have cheated before (go anon if you want), do you say this or think this way?
Posted by Anonymous on Apr. 9, 2013 at 5:52 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 9, 2013 at 5:56 PM
BUMP!
MilkLover0203
by on Apr. 9, 2013 at 5:58 PM
I don't see it that way.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 9, 2013 at 6:00 PM
how do you see it?


Quoting MilkLover0203:

I don't see it that way.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 9, 2013 at 6:08 PM
BUMP!
briellesmomma
by Velvet on Apr. 9, 2013 at 6:10 PM
I think people can change the behavior if they want to. Most of the time they won't.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Apr. 9, 2013 at 6:12 PM

No, I don't think this way. I think it's likely, but that it doesn't apply to all. Cheating is something that is often the result of a personality flaw in a person, so unless that flaw is recognized and fixed, the behavior is going to continue.

MilkLover0203
by on Apr. 9, 2013 at 6:18 PM
1 mom liked this
I see it as sometimes people have a hard time committing until they meet the right person.


Quoting Anonymous:

how do you see it?




Quoting MilkLover0203:

I don't see it that way.


Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
HaleyCovington
by on Apr. 9, 2013 at 6:18 PM
I agree.

Quoting MilkLover0203:

I see it as sometimes people have a hard time committing until they meet the right person.




Quoting Anonymous:

how do you see it?






Quoting MilkLover0203:

I don't see it that way.


Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
MilkLover0203
by on Apr. 9, 2013 at 6:29 PM
2 moms liked this
I'm basing this off personal experience obviously. I was married for six or seven years and a couple years in, it totally went to crap. I'd gotten pregnant with my son and he started drinking more to cope with his anxiety of becoming a parent. I'd asked him to go see a doctor, so he did. Then he was taking Xanax on top of a twelve pack a night which was a bad situation. As my tummy got bigger, I got put down by him. After baby came, I was still not good enough. I'd ask for counseling, couples therapy, whatever. He'd told me I'm the one with the problem, not him. So I decided to get a job and move on BUT I let him know that was my plan. I'd told him repeatedly that I was done since he wanted nothing to do with fixing our marriage, wouldn't stop drinking or popping pills, and he didn't ever think I was serious. It happened, we parted ways, I met an incredible guy and we started seeing each other. I was legally still married because I couldn't afford to take time off work to file the papers since he wasn't helping me financially and I was barely making enough to support us with a full paycheck. So for years he called me a whore, told me I committed adultery so he'd take our son in court (Adultery isn't against the law in California) and he eventually got over it. Technically I was a cheater. I have also cheated on boyfriends when I was younger but they weren't right for me. Yeah, it was shitty to do but I was young and dumb. Three years have passed and I'm engaged and just as happy with him as the day we met. It makes me physically ill to think of being with another man. My DF provides me with everything I need emotionally, and physically. Even if he weren't for some medical reason unable to provide me with as much physical contact, I'd love him just the same. He's the right one.


Quoting HaleyCovington:

I agree.



Quoting MilkLover0203:

I see it as sometimes people have a hard time committing until they meet the right person.






Quoting Anonymous:

how do you see it?








Quoting MilkLover0203:

I don't see it that way.



Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 9, 2013 at 6:29 PM
I think this way as well but I have a friend who got in a relationship with this guy and he is known for cheating on girls. All my other friends say he has cheated before so he's gonna do it again. But he really seems into her... At least a few of us think so but I also don't want to be on his side and then see my friend heartbroken.


Quoting MilkLover0203:

I see it as sometimes people have a hard time committing until they meet the right person.




Quoting Anonymous:

how do you see it?






Quoting MilkLover0203:

I don't see it that way.



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