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When someone you love loses everything.

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 32 Replies

I have no words. 

My parents and (adult) brothers lost everything today in a house fire.

Not looking for anything but support and an "I've been there and they will be fine"

I just dont know what to do to support them, I went to the store and bought them all new underwear, socks and a coffeepot (my mom asked for one and even though I know she wont have a use for it for a little while, she asked for it) I gave my mom my brand new just showed up in the mail today (literally, they were in the mailbox today) bras.... I bought them totes to keep the clothes they were given by generous neighbors, easier to carry around than grocery bags I figured, I bought my stepdad the brand of soap that wont irritate his skin since the generous donation from the local grocery didnt know, I bought my mom denture supplies and advil since tylenol interacts with her prescriptions (that I also picked up replacements for)

I made arrangements for the dogs, and bought them all new bowls and food, leashes, bones and toys

I folded donated clothes and sorted out the sizes that wouldnt work

I thought of all the little things (Tomorrow Im even taking them some pictures I heard them mention really being sad about) that will make their new normal easier to transition to

But I am at a loss for words, I felt when we were just sitting there watching the house burn, that it wasnt enough...

What do you say, what do you do, when loved ones are going through something like this

Posted by Anonymous on Apr. 9, 2013 at 7:19 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 9, 2013 at 7:24 PM

.

redhead-bedhead
by on Apr. 9, 2013 at 7:27 PM
1 mom liked this
That's so sad. It's wonderful that your community is coming together to help.
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lkane81
by on Apr. 9, 2013 at 7:29 PM
I am so so sorry. I am at a complete loss of words as well. Hope the insurance come through for them and they are all ok.
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auntietotty
by Ruby Member on Apr. 9, 2013 at 7:34 PM

That's so sad. :( Im sorry this happened to them. 

My niece and her family had that happen in 2009. She had a 5 mos old and 3 yr old at the time too.  It took about 6 mos for all the insurance stuff to be done and them a new home...but they made it through.  Our community helped too.

There's nothing really you can do but encourage them that it WILL be ok.  Eventually. It doesnt seem like it now..but it will.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 9, 2013 at 7:34 PM

We/They are so blessed to live here. Not even an hour after the fire started, word was out. I ran up the road to get some waters and coffees for all the family that showed up and the owner of the store waved me out the door, I tried insisting I should pay for the cigarettes my uncle requested.. but the owner said absolutely not, and to send his regards and if there was anything else he could do.

Just amazing... so many stores have gotten in touch with us with giftcards or lines of credit, and that one grocery store that donated all the toiletries, they even included razors and shaving cream AND TOILET PAPER! Who thinks of toilet paper at a time like that? It was like "we wouldnt have even thought of that, how generous and thougtful"

And bags of clothes, SO MANY BAGS OF CLOTHES... 

Just the outpour of love and support... 

Quoting redhead-bedhead:

That's so sad. It's wonderful that your community is coming together to help.


jojo_star
by on Apr. 9, 2013 at 7:37 PM

You just are there for them, help as much as you can, and don't offer any platitudes like, "It'll be ok" or "You're going to be fine". Let them grieve and realize the enormity of what has happened, then help them build their life back up. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 9, 2013 at 7:39 PM

Thank you. We hope so too, thankfully they did all get out okay, and the dogs as well... They have a camper they are able to stay in this summer, while they figure out the insurance and what they want to do

Quoting lkane81:

I am so so sorry. I am at a complete loss of words as well. Hope the insurance come through for them and they are all ok.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 9, 2013 at 7:40 PM

thank you

Quoting auntietotty:

That's so sad. :( Im sorry this happened to them. 

My niece and her family had that happen in 2009. She had a 5 mos old and 3 yr old at the time too.  It took about 6 mos for all the insurance stuff to be done and them a new home...but they made it through.  Our community helped too.

There's nothing really you can do but encourage them that it WILL be ok.  Eventually. It doesnt seem like it now..but it will.


Tatum2U
by Platinum Member on Apr. 9, 2013 at 7:43 PM

We lost a home to fire. I hope they have good insurance. They will be fine , just takes time. Your a great daughter !!

Newtons06
by Member on Apr. 9, 2013 at 7:43 PM
First house I owned burned down in 2007. Lost everything and actually are just now getting back on track, slowly. I know how they feel. More than anything, just be there for them. Help make an inventory for the insurance company. It takes a lot of time and several memories to inventory every single thing that was in the house. Let them cry on your shoulder and when things get stressful in the next few weeks let them vent. If you need any advice then feel free to message me.
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