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Whiney McWhiney at your service

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 10 Replies

 I'm just gong to take a minute or two to whine for a little while. I'm going anon because I'm not popular but I'm known, sorta. I'd just rather not. If you know who I am, please keep it on the DL, if you don't mind. This is far out from my "character" so whatever. Here goes nothing:

I'm the type who has always hid how I feel and still do but it doesn't negate how I feel. I try my best to be a good person, to be a person anyone can turn to. I enjoy making people happy and laugh. The problem? I'm really sick of being taken advantage of or used and played. I've been used and played twice and once very recently, which is where I think this is all stemming from. I'm so sick of being the second option and back up plan. First time, I gave an open mind and an open heart even after going through something bad and have an extremely difficult time trusting anyone or letting my guard down. Turns out, I'm easily dropped even when I need them the most, only for emotional support at that. I dished out over $300, devoted endless amount of time helping get their state paperwork correct so they wouldn't fail a class. I stayed up for 30 hours straight to help study with them before tests. Watched their dog, helped them emotionally....and physically. When I was going through some things back in February....I hadn't heard from them in a week or so. I asked for a little help emotionally, someone to talk to........dropped. Funny thing, when they needed something, guess who was the first one to be called? Yeah. I believe in second chances...whatever. I don't have any friends, LITERALLY so I figured, whatever. Things were  back to normal for 2 weeks and BAM....been dropped AGAIN! I'm sure when they need a fill in, I'll be the first they call. :/

Second time was recent. I don't even know what I did wrong. I enjoyed having someone to text. All of a sudden.......dropped. I hadn't even spent any fun time with this person and thought of him like a little brother type of deal. Guess what happened a little while ago? I got a text asking me how to register for something really important and how to go through it step-by-step. Are you kidding me? YOU TOO? I explain it because it really is extremely important but very short and to the point. I had nothing more to say. I think I'm at that point where I'm just done getting hurt. If you want to hurt me once, fuck you....I have nothing more to say. 

I have so much worth than this, why can't anyone see that? I don't expect anything from anyone....maybe that's my problem. I don't allow myself to be a doormat because I don't realize I'm getting played. I'm too nice of a person but I'm there. I've reached my breaking point. I'm not the most easiest person in the world to be friends with, I'll admit that. I'm a very blunt and straight forward person and can go 0-100 in .2 seconds but it doesn't take away the fact that I have a genuine heart.

I'm just so done with this shit. I find two people who I really felt were my friend, wanted something to do with me, who knew my caution about letting people in my life and I STILL get fucked over. I literally do NOT have one single friend. Not one. My phone hasn't gotten a text in over 3 weeks. I have a glorified iPod...that's what my phone is. It's getting to the point where I'm extremely lonely and becoming really depressed. Ya, know...........I just fucking give up.

Posted by Anonymous on Apr. 9, 2013 at 8:47 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Apr. 9, 2013 at 10:07 PM
Bump


And...whenI mean used twice, I mean in the last 8 months. Many, many, many.....more times before.
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Apr. 9, 2013 at 10:51 PM
:(
sasaronincheese
by Member on Apr. 9, 2013 at 10:55 PM
I'm the same way. I had to learn to say no a long time ago. People suck.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Apr. 9, 2013 at 11:14 PM
I have no issues saying no, that's never been my problem. I tend to try and see the good in everyone....THAT'S what fucks me over. I've been through years if things that would make anyone leery of any type of relationship. I had known these two people about, eh, 6 months for the first one and 8 the other. They always seemed to be cool with me, seemed genuine in their pursuit of whatever.

The one point after everything that I decided to open the door, break a little of the walls...I get fucked. Awesome. I honestly, want nothing more to do with anyone. I post on CM A LOT bc I'm lonely. CM is my equivalent of going out with friends. I have more people I talk to here than I have in years. IRL, my son is all I have left. Every morning when he wakes up, I give him his good morning hugs and kisses and we look in the mirror and I say, "it's me and you against the world, kiddo." That apparently, to him, means that we're superheros!

Quoting sasaronincheese:

I'm the same way. I had to learn to say no a long time ago. People suck.
DieselsMom
by Gold Member on Apr. 9, 2013 at 11:16 PM
Friend me.....I can't text b/c I don't live in the US right now but I know what you are feeling...
vegaswife2011
by Emerald Member on Apr. 9, 2013 at 11:19 PM

I'm sorry, my story is damn near identical..

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Apr. 9, 2013 at 11:22 PM
It's a shitty feeling. I want to just let out an ugly face sob but I can never do it. I can do it, I always get a lump in my throat at least twice a day but I have zero alone time to cry.

Quoting vegaswife2011:

I'm sorry, my story is damn near identical..

vegaswife2011
by Emerald Member on Apr. 9, 2013 at 11:34 PM
1 mom liked this


Hugs. It's about the most shitty feeling there is. I'm so sick of feeling taken advantage of, by everybody! Well honestly not DH. It just pissed me off that I can't just say wtf I want and not feel guilty. Ugh!! I'm trying but it's fn hard! I was the best BFF for 10 years, she was who I looked up,to, took advice from, put more then I admit to on the line, a lot. Sorry, the list goes on. Anyways I got slapped in the face when I saw her for who and what she is. It hurts, and don't cry, you will get that true one one day.z

Quoting Anonymous:

It's a shitty feeling. I want to just let out an ugly face sob but I can never do it. I can do it, I always get a lump in my throat at least twice a day but I have zero alone time to cry.

Quoting vegaswife2011:

I'm sorry, my story is damn near identical..



vegaswife2011
by Emerald Member on Apr. 9, 2013 at 11:35 PM


She was also 9 years older 

Quoting vegaswife2011:


Hugs. It's about the most shitty feeling there is. I'm so sick of feeling taken advantage of, by everybody! Well honestly not DH. It just pissed me off that I can't just say wtf I want and not feel guilty. Ugh!! I'm trying but it's fn hard! I was the best BFF for 10 years, she was who I looked up,to, took advice from, put more then I admit to on the line, a lot. Sorry, the list goes on. Anyways I got slapped in the face when I saw her for who and what she is. It hurts, and don't cry, you will get that true one one day.z

Quoting Anonymous:

It's a shitty feeling. I want to just let out an ugly face sob but I can never do it. I can do it, I always get a lump in my throat at least twice a day but I have zero alone time to cry.

Quoting vegaswife2011:

I'm sorry, my story is damn near identical..





Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Apr. 10, 2013 at 2:10 PM
Bump
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