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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Is this fair?

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 17 Replies
My husband, myself and 4 kids just moved in w/my mom. Hubby was just diagnosed w/cancer and isn't currently working though he is trying to find a job. My mom has asked us to pay half the bills. Ok totally understandable. But...she only spends her $70 FS money (she's unemployed due to downsizing) on food. I spend all of mine (which she eats around $200 worth of mine). Should that be considered in my payments? I pay about $650 to have one room. She pays $400...hubby cuts the grass and takes out the trash. I cook most meals and clean, etc. I know she opened her house to us and i'm grateful for that but with everything going on in our lives right now (losing job, cancer, new baby, hospitalized for kidneys, gallbladder, etc.) I can't afford much and it just doesn't seem fair. Shed have to pay cash for the extra food she eats if I wasn't here so shouldn't that count toward something?
Posted by Anonymous on Apr. 10, 2013 at 3:56 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Apr. 10, 2013 at 4:03 AM
Well if you take into considerations that her utilities will increase a good bit with all the extra people living with her now it only seems fair that you would be paying a bit more as your family unit accounts for the extra usage as to where it was when it was just her. Kwim?
LivysMama
by on Apr. 10, 2013 at 4:10 AM
3 moms liked this

I think it's a little douchy for her to charge you that much. :/ I don't think you should live there for free or anything, but given your finances that seems like too much.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Apr. 10, 2013 at 4:14 AM
This plus you're seriously invading her space/life and she is making huge adjustments to help you. Neither of you are really out any money as its free food. Just budget those FS a little more wisely and it will take care of that extra portion going to her. Budget so that $200 isn't a big deal, you would be going out of your way to help her just like she's going out of her way.

Quoting Anonymous:

Well if you take into considerations that her utilities will increase a good bit with all the extra people living with her now it only seems fair that you would be paying a bit more as your family unit accounts for the extra usage as to where it was when it was just her. Kwim?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 11, 2013 at 4:26 AM
We're supposed to pay half that too, though last month we paid the whole light bill.


Quoting Anonymous:

Well if you take into considerations that her utilities will increase a good bit with all the extra people living with her now it only seems fair that you would be paying a bit more as your family unit accounts for the extra usage as to where it was when it was just her. Kwim?

MommyAddie
by Platinum Member on Apr. 11, 2013 at 4:54 AM
Yeah, sounds fair. You have 6 people and she has one. I would say what you described is exactly fair.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 11, 2013 at 4:59 AM
That I pay for her food, half the bills, and cook and clean? I wouldn't do that to someone else. Oh wait I didn't do that when it was my dad but I guess that's the difference in helping someone because you want to.


Quoting MommyAddie:

Yeah, sounds fair. You have 6 people and she has one. I would say what you described is exactly fair.

MommyAddie
by Platinum Member on Apr. 11, 2013 at 5:06 AM
What isn't fair? You moved 6 people into a place that was housing 1. You need to pay for and care for 6 people. If you move 4 kids into my house, you'd be doing the cleaning here, too. Your attitude is ridiculous. If your dad wants to help so much more than your mom and wants to allow you to only partially support your large family, go back to his house and quit asking for opinions on here. But you asked and my opinion is your mom is being absolutely fair. Everything there should cost you more than her because you are responsible for more people.
Quoting Anonymous:

That I pay for her food, half the bills, and cook and clean? I wouldn't do that to someone else. Oh wait I didn't do that when it was my dad but I guess that's the difference in helping someone because you want to.





Quoting MommyAddie:

Yeah, sounds fair. You have 6 people and she has one. I would say what you described is exactly fair.

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
MizzDeeDee
by Gold Member on Apr. 11, 2013 at 5:12 AM

You shouldn't be responsible for her food. Yes, she should take that into consideration. You should however cook and clean. Paying half is pretty generous considering the amount of people that have moved in, but yes, she should consider that you're paying for her to eat.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Apr. 11, 2013 at 5:12 AM

um yeah that's way past fair if you moved 6 people in. even with you paying just half the bills her half has gone up as well. You will be putting her in a financial bind for paying for more than she is right now. That wouldn't be fair at all. Sorry about your circumstances but this is what savings and planning is for.

209mom4you
by Gold Member on Apr. 11, 2013 at 5:14 AM
1 mom liked this
Tell her to stop eatin your food.
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