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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Disgusted and very disturbed right now!

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 8 Replies

So, my mom just told me that a new chiropractor she's been going to did something very different last time she went. She has been going to chiropractors since she was a kid, so she knows what should and shouldn't be done. Now, she usually has somebody go with her-not for safety's sake or anything, just because she's a social butterfly. Last week was the first time she went alone. Well, the doc came in and was adjusting her back. Nothing unusual....a simple adjustment. The next thing she knows, he slipped both of his hands under her pants and underwear and was massaging her butt. She was so shocked, she jumped and asked him what that was. He didn't miss a beat, he calmly explained that he had liniment (sp?) on his hands and kept right on massaging. She said he used his bare hands for at least a minute. Now, my mom is very outspoken, but she was so shocked that in the moment, that she didn't question him further. After she left, it was all she could think of. It just bothered her, because no chiro has EVER done that before.

Here's what really upsets me about this. My mom is a survivor of some horrific sexual abuse as a child. Her stepfather and his friends basically used her and her sisters as playthings. My mom is one of the older sisters, and she took the brunt of it because she knew if she didn't, her little sisters would suffer. And this was back in the 50s and 60s, when the subject was pretty much shunned and nobody did anything to help. My heart is breaking for her, because I know this has reopened a major can of worms. She has dealt with her past the best that I think she possibly can, and then this asshole comes along and takes advantage. And I can't stop thinking about it .

She has gone to the police and filed a report. The police agreed that this was definite misconduct on his part. My BIL is a chiro in another state, and I asked him if there's any reason whatsoever that this was a normal part of an adjustment. He was adamant that there is no situation that calls for a "treatment" of this sort. He was quite disgusted. So I've been researching this chiro, and can't find anything! I've found a few lawsuits, one which alleges medical malpractice from 2002. Our biggest fear is that he is doing this to other patients as well. Which pissed me off, because what if these are people who've never been to a chiro before and don't realize that this isn't a part of treatment? And mom knows this wasn't his first rodeo, because he was so cool and collected when she protested.

I guess I'm just putting it on here because I'm so upset for my mom. I want so badly to nail this guy, but I don't know what to do. And I know the police are investigating, but what if they don't find enough evidence? My mom just wants him to be stopped from doing it to anyone else-she's not looking for money or anything like that. She said if the police can't pursue it, she'll just let it drop. Obviously, that concerns me for his current and future patients! So-any ideas on how to stop this guy if, God forbid, the police can't gather enough evidence?

Posted by Anonymous on Apr. 10, 2013 at 8:20 AM
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Replies (1-8):
EvaTheDiva29
by on Apr. 10, 2013 at 8:23 AM

hmmm idk. things are connected in weird ways, and there are muscles that connect to the butt area. i know with me the last time i had a mssage they went to the top of my butt and it felt good on my back also. could she just be freaking out bc of her past abuse and making it more than it is? 

ermka
by Platinum Member on Apr. 10, 2013 at 8:27 AM
1 mom liked this
At the very least, make a complaint to the ethics board. Even if the police can't do anything, it needs to be on his professional record.
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mrssummerlin
by Platinum Member on Apr. 10, 2013 at 8:32 AM
I guess if the police don't find any thing to go forward on then start standing outside basically protesting this doctor and give people the proper information about the adjustments and what they actually intel. Maybe it has happened to others and them seeing the info will urge them to step forward and give the cops more to go on.

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Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Apr. 10, 2013 at 8:36 AM

She is definitely not making it more than it is. This was not a massage-it was an adjustment. Everything was the same as it had been in the past when her friends were with her. He had never touched her butt in other adjustments, and she didn't have any new complaints. If he had done it over her clothes, she probably wouldn't have thought much of it. But the fact that he slipped his bare hands underneath her underwear and did this is what bothered her. Especially because it wasn't confined to the upper butt/lower back area. He actually massaged the cheeks for at least a minute. With bare hands!

As far as the freaking out due to past abuse...that's not her. She's just very matter of fact about her childhood and she's not over sensitive about it.

Quoting EvaTheDiva29:

hmmm idk. things are connected in weird ways, and there are muscles that connect to the butt area. i know with me the last time i had a mssage they went to the top of my butt and it felt good on my back also. could she just be freaking out bc of her past abuse and making it more than it is? 


 

thenameshailie
by Ruby Member on Apr. 10, 2013 at 8:51 AM

A lot of tension is carried in your butt, he might be a bit unconventional but it doesn't sound like a sexual assault to me.

HappySquirrel
by on Apr. 10, 2013 at 8:54 AM
My married, female physical therapist asked, explained and did the same thing to me. Nothing wrong with this, but he DEF should have asked!
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Stephd710
by Ruby Member on Apr. 10, 2013 at 8:58 AM

My chiro usually gives me a short massage before he adjusts me, but he's never gone below the belt.  He always asks if I would rather he work skin to skin or on top of my shirt.  Some Dr's are more unconventional and might just not ask and might use different techniques.  I can understand why your mom would be upset though.  He should have asked first.  Hell, even my gyno warns me before she touches me!!  

kthomasson
by Member on Apr. 10, 2013 at 8:58 AM

 

I agree completely with the ethics board.  Plus, the moment he realized she was uncomfortable with what she was doing he should have stopped.  Not even massage therapists go down and massage your bare buttocks....that's just wrong on his part.........

Quoting ermka:

At the very least, make a complaint to the ethics board. Even if the police can't do anything, it needs to be on his professional record.


 

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