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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Your infertility is not my issue

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
If a woman decides to have an abortion, people always like to throw out the argument that there are women who can't have kids, so other women shouldn't abort. They should adopt the kid out. Well, if the barren woman felt so strongly about adoption, she'd adopt a child that was already born. Why should I care if there are millions of women who can't have their own kids if I'm trying to figure out how I would care for another kid that I can't afford or knowing that the kid would be born into a bad situation. I wouldn't care. I'd do what was right for me, not Sally Carlisle from Charlotte, North Carolina who has been trying to conceive for the last 6 years. Her infertility is not my problem, neither is anybody else's. That argument is so lame. If that's how we're supposed to be, then we all should go without. If you have an iPhone, you shouldn't cause there's people using an Obama phone. You have a car? Give it away because somebody else is using the bus. Other people's problem are just that: other people's problems.
Posted by Anonymous on Apr. 14, 2013 at 12:31 PM
Replies (31-40):
MissMissfit
by on Apr. 14, 2013 at 12:52 PM

What did you think I said?

Quoting Anonymous:

Sorry, misunderstood you.

Quoting MissMissfit:

Adoption is extremely expensive. So unless those same people whom oppose abortion, also want to give another family $20,000 to adopt a child, they need to shut the fuck up. 


Anonymous
by Anonymous on Apr. 14, 2013 at 12:52 PM

 I agree! AGREE! More aggravating than that is when we added to our family and we got judged because a cousin or rather 3 are infertile. How the hell is that my problem?? We got the whole "well you already have 2, isn't it a little unfair for you to have another?" WHAT???? Yeah, I was a little pissed about that........

Lalalie
by Gold Member on Apr. 14, 2013 at 12:54 PM

What on earth is an Obama phone?

MissMissfit
by on Apr. 14, 2013 at 12:54 PM
6 moms liked this

I'm sorry for all you go through, but you don't speak for all infertile women. I have secondary infertility and I'm 100000% pro-choice. My fucked up Fallopian tubes don't get to dictate what other women choose to do with their bodies.

Quoting Yellowlily333:

Walk a mile in an infertile persons shoes. My husband and I have been ttc for over 7 years. I have had 2 misscarriages and FOUR failed adoptions. The last one was the worse. He was 6 when he came to us. We had him for 2 years. We loved him so much and wanted to adopt him. Now he is back with an abusive family. It hurts. We still keep trying, but we get no where. Then day after day I hear stories of abortions, kids being taken from parents, or see kids being mistreated and all the same here we are wanting more kids (we have one) and month after painful month they do not come.

Please, treat people struggling with infertility kindly-it is so hard to deal with!


Anonymous
by Anonymous on Apr. 14, 2013 at 12:54 PM
12 moms liked this
Abortions after 24 weeks are illegal except for medical reasons. They just don't do them at clinics, a doctor has to sign off on it. They are only done in severe cases... And because of this they are so very rare.

So yeah I call BS.


Quoting gothmom79:

Abortion is murder. Idc what anyone says. I've witnessed an abortion at 33 wks and it was freakin' terrible. Oh what a beautiful choice. smh.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Apr. 14, 2013 at 12:55 PM
5 moms liked this
And what about those kids that don't get adopted? Everybody knows which babies are the most sought after. If I got pregnant and didn't want it right now, put it up do adoption, God knows how long it would take for that child to be adopted. I would rather not have a child sitting up in foster care, getting evaluated and passed up for adoption just because someone is against what others choose for themselves. As a ex foster child, I remember going to these things where you were pretty much out up "for sale". People would go there and decide what kid they wanted to adopt. Just like at Petsmart when they adopt animals out. I would never put a kid through. Do you have any idea how shitty that makes a person feel? Then at Christmas time, you have people donating to you like you're charity case. Fuck that. Fuck that straight to hell.

Quoting MommyAddie:I usually keep my mouth shut on this, but here goes: nobody owes anyone a baby, I agree it's a terrible argument. But I look at it from the child's point of view - if you would kill your baby instead of letting it have a home with loving parents, you're a monster. It's about the baby, not the infertile women.

I adopted two kids that someone else chose to not abort. We both did what we did for the kids, not ourselves. I also have a biological child and am pregnant, so I know what that's like too.
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AVSpecWife4
by Ruby Member on Apr. 14, 2013 at 12:57 PM
14 moms liked this
There's no guarantee that all those children that would be aborted would get loving homes. That's a fantasy the pro lifers like to push.

Quoting MommyAddie:

I usually keep my mouth shut on this, but here goes: nobody owes anyone a baby, I agree it's a terrible argument. But I look at it from the child's point of view - if you would kill your baby instead of letting it have a home with loving parents, you're a monster. It's about the baby, not the infertile women.



I adopted two kids that someone else chose to not abort. We both did what we did for the kids, not ourselves. I also have a biological child and am pregnant, so I know what that's like too.
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Suzy_Sunshine
by Gold Member on Apr. 14, 2013 at 12:57 PM
2 moms liked this

when your own relatives suggest that you have too many children it is because you're doing a lousy job with the ones you have

just sayin'...

Quoting Anonymous:

 I agree! AGREE! More aggravating than that is when we added to our family and we got judged because a cousin or rather 3 are infertile. How the hell is that my problem?? We got the whole "well you already have 2, isn't it a little unfair for you to have another?" WHAT???? Yeah, I was a little pissed about that........


meaganmac
by Gold Member on Apr. 14, 2013 at 12:59 PM
3 moms liked this
I am pro-life and I do agree with what you're saying. That being said, I wish women would choose adoption over abortion because it's what's best for the child, not what's best for a world full of infertile women.
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GoddessNDaRuff
by on Apr. 14, 2013 at 1:00 PM
2 moms liked this

Most do only want the babies. I know you've seen the comments posted when asked why not go for an older, already waiting for a forever family child. No past issues or trauma with babies. It's not just a desire to parent but they want a clean slate to put their values into. They don't care about the effect on the family the kid is coming from or the older kid that needs a home and would be love to be part of their family even though it wasn't from birth. Adopton from foster care is supposed to be cheaper than an agency adoption. But folks are willing to pay big bucks for a shot at a new baby.

Quoting deadlights86:

Agreed!! Why do they need to adopt newborns there are tons of older kids that need homes as well if you can't get preggo don't make someone else go through a pregnancy just so you can have a newborn thats why I'm against giving babies up its like people are waiting to adopt babies but not older kids.


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