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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Boys are NOT necessarily more immature than girls.

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

I am so sick of seeing this myth, stereotype, whatever you want to call it.

I have 2 boys, and they are plenty immature; I have lots of friends with girls who are just as immature as my boys if not more so in some ways.

I am tired of people saying boys need to be redshirted (meaning held back from Kindergarten another year if they turn 5 in the summer), I believe EVERY child is an individual and should not be grouped into some lump category based on gender.

My older son is 7 1/2 now and in 2nd grade. He started K at a young 5, he turned 5 two weeks before Kinder started. He had been in Prek for going on 3 yrs, he was in daycare and they start teaching at 2 1/2 or before.

He was ready so we sent him and he did great and still does great. He has been on the Honor Roll every grading period since K, is in the Accelerated Reader Program, he is very smart. ANd his teachers don't think he is any more immature than any of the other kids, boy or girl.

I just want to say, your child is an individual. Just because he's a boy doesn't mean he isn't ready for school.

Posted by Anonymous on Apr. 19, 2013 at 10:52 AM
Replies (21-30):
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Apr. 19, 2013 at 11:23 AM

Being smart doesnt not equal mature. My step brother that is a month older than me has always been on a completely different maturity level from me. My kid brother just like my step brother is not nearly as mature as I was at his age. They both are very smart my kid brother makes all A's and B's as long as he is on his meds. But he is 13 and just started staying home alone after school where as I stayed home alone at 10 and babysat him at 13. So in every case I have seen guys have always been slower to mature but that doesn't mean they are not smart. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Apr. 19, 2013 at 11:26 AM

Thats true, maturity is not the same thing as being smart. I still don't feel children should be held back just based on their maturity level however.

Quoting Anonymous:

Being smart doesnt not equal mature. My step brother that is a month older than me has always been on a completely different maturity level from me. My kid brother just like my step brother is not nearly as mature as I was at his age. They both are very smart my kid brother makes all A's and B's as long as he is on his meds. But he is 13 and just started staying home alone after school where as I stayed home alone at 10 and babysat him at 13. So in every case I have seen guys have always been slower to mature but that doesn't mean they are not smart. 


Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Apr. 19, 2013 at 11:27 AM

HAHA its so true

Quoting Anonymous:

Yep, just look at this site. Lol.


Marti123
by Silver Member on Apr. 19, 2013 at 11:29 AM

 That's great it's working for your son.

Our pre-K program is individually tailored to where the strudents are and there are tons of extra programs in K-6 to keep kiddos engaged, so red-shirted kids really aren't getting bored. It is also occurring so much, I wanted my boys to have just as much advantage in leading in the classroom and ball field as all the others who were red-shirted.

I feel better just knowing that my boys get one more year getting their head screwed on stright prior to heading off to college and such. Adolescent brains in this generation, ay yi yi, who knows how immature my boys during their teen years, lol!!

But I fully understand every parents decision to do what is right for their kiddo.

Quoting Anonymous:

I personally feel if I had held him back a year it would be detrimental to his education. He already knew everything they taught in PreK and rehashing that same material would have caused him to become bored with learning and I did not want that.

I was always the youngest in my class as well with a June birthday, but I never felt more pressured than any other kid and I always did well  in school and loved learning.

Quoting Marti123:

I am so lucky I have Sept boys that missed the cut off so I don't have to make this decision.  I agree with you except I personally see very few drawbacks to holding a child back one year just in case.

If you had held your DS back one year, do you think that would have detrimental or just the obvious, not beneficial? 

I was he youngest in my class growing up; I felt most of the pressure when pre-adolescent, adolescent years.  1-2 years can make a pretty big difference when interacting with peer groups.

 


 

firespurity
by Ruby Member on Apr. 19, 2013 at 11:32 AM
The science says males mature slower then females. Physically and mentally. The biological aspects at least. That doesn't mean every male is immature, or that every female is mature. Just the rate of growth and biological development. The Times certain hormones are released, and certain developmental concepts mature. I can not say I've personally looked into how the effects behavior.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous on Apr. 19, 2013 at 11:33 AM

No I don't think they should either because like I said maturity level has nothing to do with being smart. But then again any child needs to be at a certain level in order to be able to sit in a classroom and pay attention. My son is only 2 and very smart but he is 2 so doesn't really have a maturity level yet


Quoting Anonymous:

Thats true, maturity is not the same thing as being smart. I still don't feel children should be held back just based on their maturity level however.

Quoting Anonymous:

Being smart doesnt not equal mature. My step brother that is a month older than me has always been on a completely different maturity level from me. My kid brother just like my step brother is not nearly as mature as I was at his age. They both are very smart my kid brother makes all A's and B's as long as he is on his meds. But he is 13 and just started staying home alone after school where as I stayed home alone at 10 and babysat him at 13. So in every case I have seen guys have always been slower to mature but that doesn't mean they are not smart. 




Roo1234
by Gold Member on Apr. 19, 2013 at 11:33 AM

I know plenty of people who redshirted their daughters.  Never occurred to me to think it was strickly a boy thing.

yperez0209
by on Apr. 19, 2013 at 11:34 AM
1 mom liked this

I agree with you, this type of thing gets under my skin. It also bothers me that so many boys are medicated when all they need is some time with a football and the ability to run around. Granted some really do have ADD or ADHD or whatever else the medical world can label them in order to make money. Why is there such a push to make boys behave, well, like girls? They are different and both equally challenging.

I have three boys and two girls. And I will tell you my 7yr old can easily be classified as one of those A terms but I choose to work with him. He has his good days and bad days in school but I work with his teacher and we use techniques to help him along. My son gets straight A's, it is possible.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Apr. 19, 2013 at 11:35 AM

I just hear "boys are more immature than girls" or "boys mature slower than girls" whenever redshirting is brought up. I don't personally know anyone who has redshirted their child, I dont think thats done very often where I live or if it is I don't hear about it.

Quoting Roo1234:

I know plenty of people who redshirted their daughters.  Never occurred to me to think it was strickly a boy thing.


elkmomma
by on Apr. 19, 2013 at 11:37 AM

Maturity level is not solely based on gender for a singular child.  However in general it is basically true.  I hate statistics that are used to benefit a specific point of view or need.   A child should never bee held back just because the stats are in favor of gender or probability, that should be based on the individual child.

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