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My husband has no sympathy

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
Ever since Monday my husband has been making jokes about the bombing. "Eh, at least they bombed the losers, not the winners", "The Boston accent must have literally driven them to insanity", etc. He made fun of me for crying when I found out about it. Tonight when I was watching the coverage he said "aren't you sick of this crap yet?".

I just don't understand how someone can not feel an ounce of sympathy for these people. If you don't want to watch the news coverage, fine, but making fun of the victims is taking it WAY too far.
Posted by Anonymous on Apr. 19, 2013 at 11:51 PM
Replies (51-53):
by Anonymous 13 on Apr. 20, 2013 at 2:58 PM

Quoting Kaelaasmom:

 I have a great deal of sympathy for the victims, but I am sick of the nonstop coverage.

by on Apr. 20, 2013 at 3:06 PM

I think your DH is exhibiting a form of grief - different from yours - where he just wants to move on.

Which you will do later. You are dealing with your emotions in the present more than he is.

You both just have different coping mechanisms and grief experiences. My guess is that if he thinks about the bombing, he feels really uncomfortable and maybe not like a man. Most men are not as comfortable with their emotions, and either don't want to say anything serious, or want to tell use humor that is crass and insensitive. So he doesn't want to think about it. But you can handle emotions, and you will not fall into despair by thinking about it - as he's afraid he will.

The two of you just need to allow yourselves to grieve in your own way. Good question.

by on Apr. 20, 2013 at 11:31 PM

Yes, especially since there were children killed as a consequence of the bombings I don't understand how he could be laughing about it. Does he show a lack of sympathy in general? You don't want your kids to copy his behavior.

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