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Family found out we have $$ hidden and now they want some

Posted by Anonymous
  • 114 Replies
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Both DF and I grew up poor. We don't want that for our children. We save $ as much as possible. I work full time as a daycare manager and DH works as a welder/mechanic. Hes graduated 4 year college and makes good $. We live off his paycheck alone and any money I make is direct deposited into a seperate checking account that we only deposit money in and never withdrawl from. I love the way we do it. I know most wouldn't like it, but i make good $, and DS gets to go to work with me everyday. I have a TV in my office, toys, and he can go play with the kids in daycare whenever he wants but still gets to spend the majority of the day with his mommy. Yesterday i deposited $ into it, and got a receipt back that said "Remaining Balance: __"  DS was playing in my purse and dumped everything out. I saw him chewing on a receipt, and not even thinking i asked MIL if she could grab that from him, just incase it was an important receipt. Her being her, super nosey, reads its and sees the remaining balance. She instantly starts complaining about how badly they are hurting for money and how it would be nice if anybody who cared could help her out as long as she paid them back, etc...

I just played dumb and "yeah, i dont know." and eventually she just flat out asked and said that she saw that we had $ and wanted to know if she could borrow some. I told her thats our savings and i'm not dipping into it. She was mad that we had been "lying" to her...But thats OUR money. Why should we have to dip into it? I work for NOTHING right now because we want to save our $. The last time we gave her money it was because she was going to be evicted if she didn't come up with 2 months rent (750 total) So we loaned her $ and she blew it on SIL and SIL's kids (We don't get along with SIL anyways so i dont want MY $ blew on her) 

I don't plan on giving her $, but i know this is going to continue and her keep begging for money. I've deposited every bi-weekly check i've ever made in a year and a half, and we try to deposit atleast 500 a month from DF's check. + some other money we got (School Grants, Birthday $$, etc...) Thats alot of time and $ saved to just hand over to her. DF agrees we aren't just giving away our $ but when his dad (who is just as greedy as MIL) starts asking...thats when i see DF giving in. He can't say no to his dad.

How do you handle this? No way will she just take no as an answer and not ask again. She asked us for $300 a week before DS was born, knowing that DF was going to take off 2 weeks and that 300 was all we had (Atleast, thats what SHE thought) 

Posted by Anonymous on Apr. 24, 2013 at 11:14 AM
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Replies (1-10):
by on Apr. 24, 2013 at 11:17 AM

Some people are just like that.

by Gold Member on Apr. 24, 2013 at 11:18 AM
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How ridiculous is she! I have a friend that is good at saving like you. You could ask her to go grab a coke with you and she'll tell you she doesn't have money even though she has thousands in savings. It takes a strong person to do that.

Good for you! I would just tell her that short of life or limb, she (nor anyone else) is getting any of that because it's for the children's education and you're not willing to let it go.

by on Apr. 24, 2013 at 11:18 AM
NO & tough shit if they don't like it, tomorrow, next week, month, year, the answers still gonna be NO
by Platinum Member on Apr. 24, 2013 at 11:19 AM
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First of all, congratulations on your saving habits. I wish we had your discipline. Good luck with the inlaws. I hope dh doesn't give in.
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by on Apr. 24, 2013 at 11:20 AM
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Do not give in! It will continue if you give them money. then ask for more and you will probably never see that money again. I would keep acting like they don't know about the money. I know you know and they know too but keep acting like that. 

by Sapphire Member on Apr. 24, 2013 at 11:21 AM
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Sounds like my dad.

If I were you I'd talk to your fiancé right now and tell him what his mom is asking for and remind him that you gave them money before and it was wasted and that the money is supposed to be saved for you guys.
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by on Apr. 24, 2013 at 11:21 AM

yea DF is like that. He would give his family the shirt off his back and shiver in the cold. Me..........not so much

by Platinum Member on Apr. 24, 2013 at 11:21 AM

 Tell her you will pay her to paint your home interior.  Lmfao. 

by on Apr. 24, 2013 at 11:23 AM
Too bad so sad.
by Cara on Apr. 24, 2013 at 11:24 AM
I can't imagine my parents ever asking me for money. That's so crazy to me. HIV would just flat out tell her no and if fil asked dh I would tell him no myself.
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