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Family found out we have $$ hidden and now they want some

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

Both DF and I grew up poor. We don't want that for our children. We save $ as much as possible. I work full time as a daycare manager and DH works as a welder/mechanic. Hes graduated 4 year college and makes good $. We live off his paycheck alone and any money I make is direct deposited into a seperate checking account that we only deposit money in and never withdrawl from. I love the way we do it. I know most wouldn't like it, but i make good $, and DS gets to go to work with me everyday. I have a TV in my office, toys, and he can go play with the kids in daycare whenever he wants but still gets to spend the majority of the day with his mommy. Yesterday i deposited $ into it, and got a receipt back that said "Remaining Balance: __"  DS was playing in my purse and dumped everything out. I saw him chewing on a receipt, and not even thinking i asked MIL if she could grab that from him, just incase it was an important receipt. Her being her, super nosey, reads its and sees the remaining balance. She instantly starts complaining about how badly they are hurting for money and how it would be nice if anybody who cared could help her out as long as she paid them back, etc...

I just played dumb and "yeah, i dont know." and eventually she just flat out asked and said that she saw that we had $ and wanted to know if she could borrow some. I told her thats our savings and i'm not dipping into it. She was mad that we had been "lying" to her...But thats OUR money. Why should we have to dip into it? I work for NOTHING right now because we want to save our $. The last time we gave her money it was because she was going to be evicted if she didn't come up with 2 months rent (750 total) So we loaned her $ and she blew it on SIL and SIL's kids (We don't get along with SIL anyways so i dont want MY $ blew on her) 

I don't plan on giving her $, but i know this is going to continue and her keep begging for money. I've deposited every bi-weekly check i've ever made in a year and a half, and we try to deposit atleast 500 a month from DF's check. + some other money we got (School Grants, Birthday $$, etc...) Thats alot of time and $ saved to just hand over to her. DF agrees we aren't just giving away our $ but when his dad (who is just as greedy as MIL) starts asking...thats when i see DF giving in. He can't say no to his dad.

How do you handle this? No way will she just take no as an answer and not ask again. She asked us for $300 a week before DS was born, knowing that DF was going to take off 2 weeks and that 300 was all we had (Atleast, thats what SHE thought) 

Posted by Anonymous on Apr. 24, 2013 at 11:14 AM
Replies (111-114):
by Ruby Member on Apr. 24, 2013 at 6:57 PM
What the fuck is wrong with her. I would straight up tell her it's none of her business.
Or tell her you can't withdraw from it.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by Ruby Member on Apr. 24, 2013 at 6:57 PM
I think that's awesome btw! You rock!
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on Apr. 24, 2013 at 7:06 PM

You need to talk with your DF. Explain that you know that he has a hard time saying no to his dad but that it is BOTH of your money and that if he agreed to give his dad anything without your OK that would be a serious breech of trust.

As far as your MIL goes, tell her to stop begging and remind her what happened last time you lent her money.

by on Apr. 24, 2013 at 9:56 PM

Quoting Anonymous:

Quoting sissy502:

I sooooo badly want to know how much you have saved this way (but I won't be rude and ask) ..

I myself need a creative way to save money & I love how you've managed this. Good for you!! Stick to your guns, tell her when money goes into that account it does not come out... PERIOD!


Thats the total in our bank account, not just from me working and depositing my checks, its all the money total we saved up.

I love the way we do it. 

   Way to go!!! Your MIL should be proud of your ability to save for your future!

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