I am so sick and tired of my ss(21y). The other day my SD(26y) was over at the house with her 5yo dd visting with me and my 2yo DS. I practically raised them myself, their mother is a horrible excuse of a mom. Never did anything for them. So my SD calls me mom. It has always annoyed ss that she calls me that. I never asked them to call me that. Anyway they were over and I had mentioned to SD that the other day when her dd was over at my house ss was on the phone to his mom (they have a very unhealthy relationship) and asked my granddaughter if she wanted to talk to her grandma. My SD has stated that she wants nothing to do with her Bio mom and doeant want her dd having anything to do with her either and ss knows his sisters wishes and is constantly ignoring them. So I felt my SD had a right to know what was going on with her dd. She was pissed. But kept her cool so when her brother immerged from his cave of a bedroom she told him once again that she doesn't want her dd talking to that women. And ss got a huge attitude! He starts getting a violent demeanor about him and he gets all up in SD face as she is sitting in the couch with her dd in her lap. And I'm sitting on the love seat with my DS. She keeps telling him to back up and stop cussing in front of the kids. He wasn't listening. So she said if he didn't back off she was calling the cops. I'm sitting there waiting for him to punch her cause he's like that. He's a violent person. So SD gets on the phone and calls DH at work saying what's going on and that he needs to control his son or she's calling the cops. ss is still spewing hurtful and stupids garbage from his mouth. And SD daughter starts giving some of it back to him saying how worthless he is, doeant help out around here, doesn't have a job, just sits in his room playing video games. He then retorts with that she should shut her whore mouth and then she brings in her dd and saying that my SD is a whore cause she doesn't know what ni***r she f^*%ed to get knocked up. My jaw hits the floor. Both of us say at the same time he needs to leave and to shut up and to quit talking like this in front of a 2 and 5yo! This whole time I had been holding my tounge but that was the last straw. Ss told SD that she doeant belong here cause its not her house and SD says that its not his either that he's just a bum freeloading off of us. And I said that SD has every right to be here. And he looks at me and points and says that I don't belong her either. That was it for me! I am so sick of the disrespectful bs that is this guy! He does nothing here and he's always bumming money from us so he can buy soda and junk food (i don't keep it in the house). He's loud doesn't shower or clean up after himself. I'm sick of playing maid to him. But I can't jot clean it cause that would make my house dirty. I want that pos out of my house. I told DH that either he goes or me and my DS go. Was I wrong to say this? I don't want him around my ds. He's toxic. He has no respect for me so therefore I have none for him. He's a grown ass man. It's time he was on his own! He's already hit me once. I was 8mo pregnant with DS when he hit me in the head during an argument. I left then and was about to make the 2day drive to my parents house when I started having regular contractions that landed me in the hospital and on bed rest for a week. I can't stand him and this outburst was the last straw. Sorry so long I'm still pissed off about this. I needed to vent.
But was I wrong to give DH an ultimatum? And I will say this ahead of time no I'm not a troll, just a mom who is sick and tired of having someone in my home I can't stand and makes me fearful of what's to come next. We had to go out and buy an even more secure gun safe cause we don't trust him. I don't let my son near him and he's never been alone with him. It's causing too much stress. I can't live like this anymore!!