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So Angry Im Crying UPDATE

Posted by on Apr. 25, 2013 at 8:00 PM
  • 343 Replies

 Im one of those types of people who when they get extreme mad they break down into tears and right now thats what Im doing. All this is over my daughter who will be 8 in June and the bitch who is my ex husband's gf. In our court orders I am to have uninterrupted phone time (since she is in CT and I am in TX) every night at 7pm EST and no one is allowed (on either side) to record or have anyone listen in. This gf breaks that every night and tells my daughter what to say and lately it was not to talk to me and made up excuses as to why. Tonight really put me over the edge when she tried again to make up an excuse and I told her no she is to talk to me since its my only way at the moment to bond with her, thats when the gf took the phone. The gf told me since they are not receiving child support that I wont be speaking to my daughter anymore. I told her put my child on the phone and she flat out said no Im her mother now you are only an egg donor and that they put in papers to have my rights removed. Now before you ladies jump on me about paying cs Ive been working with my doctors and the support enforcement agency to work it out the current order and any arrears. Ive been unable to work due to a medical condition and my only income right now is my VA benefits which are $420 a month which goes to my car payment, my husband does work but all that money goes to our rent, bills, and food. Now this bitch has no right what so ever to control the contact between my child and I. I dont think they can take my rights away just because I am unable to work at this time and havent been able to see her as much due to money and my medical problems right?? They cant claim abandonment as the reason to remove rights because I talk with her on the phone and send out school supplies, clothes, and presents (I have receipts and pictures to prove those).  I just want to strangle this woman!! She has been causing problems for over a year now and my exhusband doesnt believe that she is doing anything wrong. I dont have a lawyer or even have the money for one plus I cant travel a million times to CT for court dates. As it is I can barely even leave my own home without either passing out or shitting all over myself. I just want my child back the way she was before this woman. Oh and I want to add I never lost custody of her, my ex just has primary physical custody and we have joint legal custody. The divorce happened while I was still active duty and the judge found it best she lives with my ex. Yes I am out now and believe me I am trying to change the custody order but again money is tight.

 

UPDATE

Well I talked to my exhusband this morning and I got to talk to my daughter as soon as she got home from school (she is home by 3 EST). Things went better because he was there during the call. My daughter seemed happier today and we talked almost 30 mins. I asked if she liked the calls after school instead of at night and she said yes. I hope that maybe with the change of timing it will help the calls better. 

by on Apr. 25, 2013 at 8:00 PM
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Replies (1-10):
lucky2Beeme
by Ruby Member on Apr. 25, 2013 at 8:05 PM
1 mom liked this

hugs momma. I'm sorry . I can only imagine how much pain you are feeling. I hope someone comes to their senses and helps you out.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Apr. 25, 2013 at 8:06 PM
1 mom liked this
If the gf is causing the problem, that is wrong. However, if your dd says she doesn't want to talk, you yell and say yes you will talk to me, and then gf takes the phone and says she is done talking to you for the night, then I dont see the issue. At 8, your kid is old enough to decide if she feels like talking to you that night.

As far as child support, welcome to the world dads live in. Suck it up and figure out how to pay.
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Apr. 25, 2013 at 8:06 PM
Sorry mama :(
I fear when my sons father finds a gf that we won't get along and it'll cause problems. My son is MINE. And your daughter is YOURS. Ugh I hate that so much when people act like that. Good luck!
hautemama83
by Emerald Member on Apr. 25, 2013 at 8:09 PM
1 mom liked this
She shouldn't.be interrupting your phone time. Frankly its not her business or place to anyway.
that said, you need to pay cs. Even something is better than nothing. And right now you're giving nothing in means if support to your child.
ksueditz
by on Apr. 25, 2013 at 8:11 PM

you need to explain to the gf, she is NOT your child's mother, and that in court, and IRL, child support is not connected to visitation. she cannot stop you f/ your contact w/ your child, b/c you are not paying child support. i would document any time you hear her saying anything negative about you to/around your child. you can use alienation of affection to help your case.

SilverOcean84
by Silver Member on Apr. 25, 2013 at 8:13 PM

 First I didnt yell at her, second if she wants to or not its ordered as to keep some type of bond. There are times where I do give her the night off, for example if I am in the hospital due to a flare of my Crohns (which happens a lot lately) or if she has an activity that night (sports, girl scouts, school function). As for the child support I am already working with the enforcement office to pay what little I have. Its not like I am trying to get out of paying cs or have it stopped.

Quoting Anonymous:

If the gf is causing the problem, that is wrong. However, if your dd says she doesn't want to talk, you yell and say yes you will talk to me, and then gf takes the phone and says she is done talking to you for the night, then I dont see the issue. At 8, your kid is old enough to decide if she feels like talking to you that night.

As far as child support, welcome to the world dads live in. Suck it up and figure out how to pay.

 

Sarafinn2012
by on Apr. 25, 2013 at 8:15 PM

Damn your situation really sucks. I am sorry. Can't you get a court appointed attorney? your ex sounds like a jackass and his girlfriend a controlling beast. I hope thiings start looking up for you. :(

Kodysmommy928
by Platinum Member on Apr. 25, 2013 at 8:16 PM
14 moms liked this
You don't have custody of your child and you feel that a car is more important than supporting her. I can't feel sorry for you.
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Apr. 25, 2013 at 8:18 PM
3 moms liked this

I'll refrain from saying what I want to say and just say I don't think very highly of women who don't have custody of their kids OR pay cs!  Oh ya and save the excuses because that's what they are excuses!

WifeyC
by Platinum Member on Apr. 25, 2013 at 8:18 PM

Are you paying anything in CS? You should be paying at least something every month.

You didn't abandon your child and they can't get your rights taken away.  

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